Page 119 of Return of the Spider

“Angry at life before we told him. Astonished at life by the time we left.”

“That must have made you feel good.”

I nodded. “It did. But I can’t help wondering if it’s enough. Honestly, it makes me question if I want to go on being adetective. I mean, my reputation, my career—it was all built on lies, Nana.”

My grandmother set the casserole dish down on the stovetop. “First of all, getting Harold Beech out of prison isnotenough. It’s a start, but you’ll have to keep at it, doing good deeds in his name and in Eamon Diggs’s memory. And second, enough of this woe-is-me stuff. You were born to be a detective, Alex Cross. You were born to right wrongs.”

“Even my own?”

“Especially your own,” she said. “That’s the mark of a real man.”

For reasons I couldn’t explain, I felt overwhelmed at that. I went to her, leaned over, and hugged her tiny little bird body tight.

“What’s this about?” Nana said, sounding baffled and patting me on the back.

“I love you for always setting me straight, for always seeing a smart way forward.” I pulled back and looked down at her. “I don’t tell you that enough. I don’t know what I would have done without you after Maria died. And I don’t know what I’d do without you now.”

“Well, thank you for all that. My God,” she said, wiping tears off her cheeks after I kissed her on the head. “And I love you too, Alex. But I’ll have you know, according to my cardiologist, I’m not going anywhere anytime soon.”

I thought of everything I’d been through that day and started chuckling.

“What are you laughing at?”

“I don’t know. I’ve spent years going after evil spiders in all sizes and shapes. And here you are, this little old lady in hernineties, and you are the strongest person I’ve ever known, and you remember everything. You’re like… you’re like an elephant or something.”

Nana Mama laughed. “I’d say I’m more like a tortoise these days. But a lot of themdolive to be a hundred years old or more.”

“I’ve heard that,” I said, hugging her again. “Lucky me.”