Page 5

Gabe

I ’m giving myself an internal pep talk while Mika and I feed and exercise the dogs. Focus, Gabe. Just focus. Keep it together. Don’t think about how you tackled the man and practically dry-humped him into the bed earlier.

I’m not a prude—God knows that—but this unrelenting, primal need I feel for Mika is shaking me. It’s not just attraction. It’s something deeper, something that bypasses logic entirely and drills straight into me.

And then there’s what happened when Mika started to…change.

I still don’t fully understand what I saw. One moment he was standing there, looking like he was about to bolt, and the next, fur was sprouting from his arm. My brain short-circuited, and every thought I had was replaced by a wild mix of panic and possessiveness. Before I even realized what I was doing, I tackled him.

Maybe it wasn’t the smartest move, but it worked. He stayed.

Now I can’t stop thinking about him. The feel of him under me, the taste of him, the way he looked when he came—it’s burned into my mind, and no matter how hard I try to focus, my body keeps reminding me that I want more.

I toss a ball for Jojo, trying to shake off the thoughts. The heeler bolts after it, a blur of energy and enthusiasm that makes me grin. But when Jojo trots back with the ball, it isn’t to me.

It’s to Mika.

He’s sitting nearby, his hand outstretched as Jojo drops the slobbery toy into his palm.

Mika looks at me, his cheeks flushing as he shrugs apologetically. “Sorry, it’s an…alpha thing,” he says, his voice unsure.

An alpha thing?

Guilt and irritation twist together in my chest. If Mika’s the alpha, what does that make me? The beta? The…bitch?

“I don’t think so,” I mutter under my breath, the flicker of resentment surprising even me.

Jojo clearly doesn’t care who flung whom onto the bed earlier.

The thought is so ridiculous it makes me laugh out loud, the sound bursting from me before I can stop it. Mika glances up, startled, but I shake my head, grinning despite myself. Of course Jojo would see Mika as the alpha—the man is part wolf, for God’s sake. And no matter how crazy it sounds, I can’t deny the pull I feel toward him.

I fold my arms, arching a eyebrow at Mika. “You two about done?”

He kneels and gives Jojo a final round of praise, his hands gliding over the dog’s short fur with a gentleness that makes something in my chest tighten.

“Sure,” he says as he stands.

I look away quickly, but not before I catch myself envying Jojo. I know how those hands feel—just not as well as I want to.

“ So…” I clear my throat, forcing my voice to sound casual as we head back toward the house. “Breakfast, I guess? Any preference? What do…uh…”

God, I’m fumbling . My cheeks burn as I stumble over the words, feeling like some awkward teenager trying to impress a crush.

Mika’s lips twitch, amusement lighting his face. “Shapeshifters?” he offers, his tone teasing.

I glare at him, but it only makes him smirk.

“Right,” I say, my voice flat. “Shapeshifters. So, uh…what do you eat? Regular food, or do you have some kind of special diet?”

The question feels absurd even as I ask it, and I know my face is probably glowing red.

Mika doesn’t seem fazed. He considers the question seriously as we step into the kitchen. “Pretty much whatever you eat, Gabriel—”

“Gabe,” I interrupt, stopping short to face him. “Just Gabe is fine. I mean, I did just have my hand wrapped around your cock and your cum on my fingers…and stomach…and…”

Mika’s eyes darken, the heat in his gaze slamming into me like a physical force. My words trail off as my brain grinds to a halt, my body reacting faster than my mind can process.

I lean into him, my palms finding his chest. The solid warmth of him steadies me even as confusion and fear swirl inside me. I don’t understand this pull, this need, but I can’t resist it.

My stomach growls, loud and insistent, breaking the moment. Mika lets out a breathless laugh, stepping back slightly.

“Come on,” he says, his voice rough as he takes my hands and presses them to his chest. “Let’s get you fed.”

His touch lingers as he pulls me toward the stove, and I know I’m in trouble.

“ Breakfast, Gabri—Gabe. And maybe some kibble, if you have extra.”

The teasing warmth in Mika’s voice sends a flutter through my belly, though I narrow my eyes at him, pretending to take offense.

“I should give you kibble, just for that. And for backing away from that kiss. That was just cruel, Mika.”

I smile, softening the sting of my words. The last thing I want to do is hurt him. From what I’ve seen, someone else has already done that far too well. There’s a lost, hurt look in his eyes that tugs at something deep inside me, like a mirror to the way I felt when my parents kicked me to the curb.

If it hadn’t been for my grandparents…

I shake off the thought. I can’t leave someone else feeling like that. Especially not Mika.

“Let’s see what we have,” I say, tugging him by the hand toward the refrigerator.

I open the door and bend over, making a point to bump my ass into his groin. The sharp hiss of indrawn breath behind me makes me grin like a lunatic as I pull out bacon and eggs.

But before I can fully straighten, strong arms wrap around me, locking across my belly. The food nearly slips from my hands as Mika’s lips brush the side of my neck. The caress sends a shiver down my spine, but when he sucks hard and his teeth graze my skin, my knees nearly buckle.

“Gonna drop the…breakfast,” I manage to gasp.

Mika doesn’t seem to care. He tugs me toward the table, taking the bacon and eggs from my hands and setting them down. My head spins, my pulse hammering in my veins so hard it makes me dizzy.

Then I see his ey es.

The raw heat in his gaze sends need and panic tumbling through me in equal measure.

“No. I…can’t.”

I shake my head for emphasis, the words leaving my mouth before I can think. The effect on Mika is immediate. He freezes, his expression shifting as a flicker of pain cuts through his features.

I feel like shit.

“I’m sorry,” I say quickly, running trembling fingers through my hair as I glance away. “I shouldn’t have teased you.”

I take a steadying breath, forcing myself to face him again. “I don’t know why I did it. I mean, I want you—who wouldn’t? But this, what’s going on between us, it scares the shit out of me.”

I can feel the heat rising in my face as I try to put words to the hurricane of emotions swirling inside me.

“There’s this clawing need in my gut to…to…”

The blush spreads to my ears, and I have to look away again.

“It’s like all I want to do is taste you, touch you, feel you,” I admit, my voice barely above a whisper.

And then it hits me—a humiliating flash of insight that makes my stomach drop. My breath hitches, and my heart thunders in my chest as the realization claws its way to the surface. The feeling isn’t entirely mine, though. It’s foreign and yet familiar, like it’s weaving itself into me through the bond I share with Mika.

It’s overwhelming.

Heat floods through my body, a flush that starts deep in my chest and radiates outward, making my skin feel too tight, my senses razor sharp. It’s a sensation that doesn’t belong to me—or at least, it shouldn’t. But through Mika, I’m aware of every flicker of tension, every surge of need as if it were my own.

“ Shit,” I mutter, my voice trembling. The word catches in my throat, thick and clumsy as I try to make sense of it. “I don’t even know how the fuck I know this, but I feel like…”

I trail off, heat prickling my skin as the truth settles over me, thick and suffocating. I don’t want to say it, but I can’t hold it back.

“I feel like I’m in heat around you.”

The words barely leave my mouth before shame and confusion rear up like a wave, threatening to drown me. It doesn’t make sense—how could this be happening to me? My human body wasn’t built for this, wasn’t supposed to feel like it’s on fire with need so intense it borders on primal.

But I do.

Through the connection, I can feel it rolling off Mika like an inferno, his own longing, his instincts bleeding into me. It’s not just physical—it’s something deeper, something ancient and wild that my human mind can’t quite comprehend. My body is reacting to him as if it’s answering a call I didn’t know existed.

The heat isn’t only arousal—it’s a compulsion. My body feels drawn to his in a way that’s terrifying and thrilling at the same time. My pulse pounds in my ears, and every inch of me feels hyperaware of him. His presence is magnetic, pulling me closer even when I’m not moving.

I can feel the change happening inside me, as though my body is syncing with his on a level I’ve never experienced before. This is emotional, mental, even spiritual. Like my entire being is reshaping itself to fit with his, as though the bond between us is rewriting the very rules of what I am.

The sensation is equal parts intoxicating and unsettling. My breath comes in short, shallow gasps, my body buzzing with a need I can’t control, and I hate it.

I h ate the loss of control, the vulnerability of it. But at the same time, I can’t help but crave it. To lean into it. To see where it takes me.

“What the fuck is happening to me, Mika?” My voice is low, ragged, desperate. I don’t even know if I’m asking him or myself, but I need answers—need him to help me make sense of this.

I meet his gaze, and the intensity there is almost too much. His eyes burn with something I can’t quite name, but it settles me in a strange way, like he’s my anchor in this storm.

Through the bond, I can feel Mika’s own emotions swirling—desire, protectiveness, and something deeper that feels a hell of a lot like awe. It’s grounding and overwhelming all at once.

He steps closer, his hand cupping my jaw, and I realize I’m trembling under his touch. “You feel it too, don’t you?” he asks, his voice soft but charged with meaning.

I nod, swallowing hard. There’s no point in denying it—not when it’s written all over me, inside and out.

“It’s the bond,” Mika murmurs, his thumb brushing over my cheek. “I’m sorry, Gabe. I didn’t know it would be like this.”

I close my eyes, leaning into his touch despite myself. His words make sense in a way that cuts through the chaos in my mind. As disorienting as it is, I can’t deny how right it feels, even as it terrifies me.

“Mika,” I whisper, the word trembling on my lips, “what do I do?”

His hand slides to the back of my neck, guiding me with the strength of his grip. “You don’t have to do anything, babe,” he says, his voice a low rumble that sends shivers down my spine. “Just let me take care of you.”

My hands are shaking. I can feel the panic and I’ve no doubt it’s as plain as day on my face. I dart a glance at Mika.

What I see stops everything else cold.

His shoulders are slumped, his fists now clenched at his sides as he takes a step away, and the look on his face is so hopeless it’s like a punch to the chest.

It’s not frustration or impatience. It’s…resignation.

That one look pulls at me harder than any of the other emotions I’ve been wrestling with. The panic fades, replaced by an uncontrollable need to fix it, to comfort him.

I finally take a deep breath and step toward him without thinking, the urge to soothe him stronger than anything else.

I push off the countertop and close the distance between us, covering Mika’s white-knuckled fists with my hands. His tension is palpable, radiating off him in waves, and the sight of his tightly clenched fingers makes my chest ache.

I can’t resist leaning in, brushing my lips against his. The soft contact sends a shiver through me, my own desperation to comfort him almost overpowering. Hell, at this point, I’d drop down on the floor and spread myself wide open if it meant getting rid of that cloak of dejection hanging over him. If I can feel him through the bond, he must also be able to feel my emotions.

Not smart, jackass.

It’s that sort of unrelenting need that freaked me out in the first place.

Well, that and the whole wolf thing.

I press another kiss to his lips before resting my forehead against his. The warmth of him relaxes me, steadies me even as my heart races. “It’ll be okay,” I whisper. “Eventually. I’m sorry I freaked out on you. It’s just confusing, and pretty fucking scary to be honest.”

Mika’s pain flickers, momentarily visible in his eyes, before it starts to fade. I feel the tension ease out of him, his fists unclenching beneath my han ds. He turns his palms upward, linking his fingers through mine, his grip light but steady.

“I know it’s a lot to take in,” he says softly, his lips quirking into a smile that should come with a damn warning label. The sight of it sends a jolt straight to my gut, a mix of warmth and heat that makes it hard to think.

“But it isn’t just you,” he continues, his voice dropping lower. “I know it’s new and frightening. I feel the same way. It’s like nothing matters other than burying my cock as deep inside you as I can and—”

“Oh shit, you can’t say things like that when I’m this damned horny!”

The words tumble out of me before I can stop them, my entire body shivering at the image his words plant in my head. It takes everything I have not to throw caution to the wind and let him do exactly what he just said.

If we both feel this pull, this need , then why shouldn’t we act on it?

My prick certainly thinks it’s a great idea, throbbing insistently as if to emphasize its point. But no matter how persuasive that argument is, I’m not ready to let that particular part of me take the lead.

I take a half step back, putting just enough distance between us to keep myself from losing control entirely.

“No matter how bad my body wants you—and believe me, it wants you very bad—I can’t just shut off my brain.” My voice comes out uneven, my breath catching on every word. “I don’t understand this, but you said you feel it, too. Yet…” I narrow my eyes, studying him. “This doesn’t surprise you. Not really.”

Mika releases one of my hands, his expression thoughtful as he gently guides us back to the counter where the makings for breakfast sit forgotten.

“ You’re wrong, partially,” he says, his voice steady but quiet. “Finding you—that surprised the living hell out of me. But this feeling…” He pauses, his gaze meeting mine. “It’s something I’ve heard of before, among shifters.”

I reach up, cupping his chin and forcing him to meet my eyes. “I think I found you, buddy.”

The words come out stronger than I expect, a small surge of confidence bubbling to the surface. “As for the other, you can explain it after we eat.”

Mika smiles, his lips twitching with that grin that does dangerous things to my self-control. A rush of heat pools low in my stomach, and I have to grip the edge of the counter to keep myself from giving in.

Some of my inner struggle must show in my expression, because Mika’s grin falters. His eyes darken, his gaze turning feral for a brief, heart-stopping moment before he shakes his head and exhales slowly.

“I don’t think so, Gabe,” he says, his voice dropping into a low growl that makes my pulse race.

His hand moves, stroking me through my jeans, and a near-breathless moan tears out of me. My hips jerk forward instinctively, chasing the pressure, and I grab his hand, trying to hold it against my aching cock.

But Mika shakes his head again, gently pulling his hand away.

“You’d regret it,” he says softly, his tone filled with certainty. “Once we were done, you’d regret it. And I don’t want that.”

I groan, letting my chin drop to my chest. Mika’s right—I know that. Intellectually, anyway. My body, however, isn’t interested in reason.

Mika releases my other hand and steps toward the table, pausing with one hand on the back of a chair. He watches me carefully, waiting for what I assume is permission to sit.

“ Do you need help with breakfast?” he asks, his voice steady but soft.

I sigh, frustration threading through me as I shift, trying to ease the pressure of my cock against my zipper. “No, go ahead and have a seat. It won’t take long to fix this stuff.”

I turn away before I can watch him sit down.

Big mistake.

Out of the corner of my eye, I catch a glimpse of him settling into the chair, and my breath hitches. He looks…right. Too right. Like he belongs there, at my table, in my house.

I want to keep him.

And he wants to stay.

The thoughts send a small shiver through me, one that’s equal parts excitement and unease.

Smiling to myself, I grab a skillet and set it on the stove. It’s not just my body anymore—my head’s finally caught up. I want to keep Mika.

As I lay strips of bacon in the pan, I can’t hold back a bigger grin. It looks like I’m going to have to broaden my horizons, open my mind, and let go of whatever reservations I’m holding on to. That’s what it’ll take to have the man sitting at my table.

Twice now, I’ve seen that broken, hurt look sweep over Mika’s face, like a shadow he can’t quite escape. I don’t know why it’s there, and maybe I’ll never fully understand what’s happening between us.

But I do know this—I’ll do everything I can to make sure he never wears that look again.