Page 5 of Rejected Sold Mate (Crystal Creek Wolves #4)
Maybe you’ve set your standards too high, and that’s why you were so hurt by Jayce, something treacherous in my mind hissed. Could it be that when he rejected you, it was the final clue you needed that the kind of men you’re into will never pay you an ounce of attention?
That odd, sad feeling crashed over me again, and I had to blow out a slow breath to not tear up. I didn’t think that’s what the girls wanted when they made me confront my own reflection. I pasted on a fake smile and nodded once. “Yeah, I guess I’m not too bad.”
Nayeli patted my shoulders, “That’s the spirit. You—”
“Nayeli.”
All four of us turned at the sound of the deep voice, and my heart sank. It was Scott speaking, and he looked both glad to see his wife and annoyed that she was out in her condition. But it wasn’t Scott that bothered me.
It was the other three Alphas with him.
Gwen, Nayeli, and Kiera went to their husbands to greet them, and I hung back, my heart in my throat, my gaze lowered so I didn’t have to meet the eye of the only lone Alpha left.
Jayce, for his part, wasn’t looking at me either. He’d stared straight at me when we all turned around, looking like a deer in the headlights, but he’d quickly switched his aloof Alpha mask back on and had returned to pretending like I didn’t exist.
And, oh, God, was it a punch to the gut.
Out in broad daylight, he was even more striking than he’d been the night we hooked up.
There was nothing left of the easygoing man who had taken me back to his cabin and made me sob out of pleasure and kissed me like I meant something.
Instead, his shoulders were back, his expression blank, and his eyes hard.
The girls were chatting with their men, voices happy and light, but it all sounded like static to me. I was trying my best to blend into the brick wall of the shop, my eyes locked on the sidewalk, wishing that I could have been anywhere but there.
It was like I could feel Jayce, barely six feet away from me, and something was pulling me towards him, but I forced myself to ignore it.
The sad, nostalgic ache had returned tenfold in his presence, and something deep within my mind was telling me that if I were just able to touch him, the ache would finally subside.
I swallowed once, and then twice, my mouth bone dry, and miserably waited for my friends to finish their chat.
I was sure it was about to wind down and my torture would be over when the Lunas started to kiss their men goodbye, but then Kiera chirped, “Oh! Rhie, you’ve met Jayce, right? He’s the Alpha of the new alliance back, the Blacktides.”
I almost groaned out loud, but I was able to keep my composure. “In…in passing, yeah.”
Kiera looked at Jayce, who surprisingly gave me one silent, grouchy nod before he went back to glaring into the distance, but apparently that behavior wasn’t too out of line for him, because Kiera just shrugged and said, “Okay! We’ll see you boys later. We’ve got shopping to do.”
I endured a miserable ten more seconds while they all kissed goodbye, way too intensely in my opinion, and then finally the Alphas were on their way.
Jayce passed by me like I was invisible, but I still caught hints of his scent, evergreen with something chill like freshly fallen snow, and it nearly made me double over in agony.
I’d never wanted anything so badly as I wanted to touch him at that moment.
It was like I was starving in a totally new way.
No food or drink could bring me any sort of satisfaction. Only Jayce.
I was, undoubtedly, losing my mind.
It was a sweet relief to be in the bookshop finally, and I begged a moment away, saying I needed to seek out a book in a niche section I knew none of the other girls were interested in.
Once I was there, I leaned against the shelf, plucked a random title from the shelf so I’d look more convincing if any of my friends came to find me, and closed my eyes, taking a much-needed breather.
My heart was still racing, my muscles ready to chase down the Blacktide Alpha and demand he give me his attention, and I inhaled and exhaled slowly to try to regain control of myself.
It was working, incredibly, and breath by breath, I was able to regain the calmness I needed to get through the rest of the day. I’d survived. It would be okay.
I felt him before I saw him, and I still kept my eyes closed, hoping beyond hope that I was wrong, and that if I didn’t look at him, he’d disappear. Then the book I forgot I was holding was plucked out of my grasp, and Jayce laughed.
“Do you spend a lot of time reading about…” he paused, flipping the book over to look at the cover, “ Coins of the Roman Empire?”
Snatching the book back, I held it close to my chest to disguise how fast I was breathing. “What do you want?” I hissed, voice low.
Jayce moved forward, so close that I had nowhere I could run, and lowered his head so he could speak quietly to me. His hands hit the top of the shelf on either side of my head, and I felt like I was about to jump out of my skin.
“I wanted to get a moment alone with you to make something very, very clear, Omega. Every time I see you out in public, I need you to act just like you did on the street a moment ago. Like we are strangers, because that’s all that we are.”
I tried not to flinch, but I know my expression wasn’t as neutral as I wanted it to be. I refused to look at him and focused on his shoulder instead. “Yeah, I know. You don’t have to spell it out for me. I’m not an idiot.”
“Are you sure?” he scoffed. “Because it was pretty idiotic to hide your identity just to sleep with me.”
I’d never wanted to run away from something as bad as I did in that moment, but I was trapped. “You weren’t exactly forthcoming about who you were, either.”
“Because fucking an Alpha isn’t anything to be embarrassed of.
But you? If the other Alphas knew I slept with you, I’d be humiliated.
It would be embarrassing enough that it might jeopardize my trial period as part of the alliance.
So keep your pretty mouth shut, okay? Or I can make things a lot more difficult around here for you. ”
Tears were burning in the corners of my eyes, and I blinked rapidly, willing them not to fall.
How could he be so damned hurtful when I’d already done exactly what he asked by ignoring him?
Jayce was just twisting the knife, making sure I knew once again that someone like him would never willingly stoop to my level.
“Fine.” I managed to get out, but that wasn’t good enough.
“I think you mean, ‘Yes, Alpha.’”
The thought of stomping on his booted foot was almost irresistible, but the longer he had me cornered, the more likely it would be that my friends would see him with me and have a million questions.
What did it even matter? He’d already shamed me to an unbelievable point.
What would a little more humiliation hurt? ”
“...yes, Alpha.”
Jayce said nothing more, just pushed away from the bookshelf and was gone. I had to steady myself, my knees like water, the urge to cry so strong that I could barely take a breath.
Somewhere in the shop, the three best friends I’d ever had were browsing, laughing, and enjoying the lives that they deserved, none of them aware of what had just happened to me.
I didn’t deserve their friendship, just like I didn’t deserve a place in the pack.
I’d ruined the little pocket of peace I’d finally been able to build for myself, just like I ruined everything else in my life that could possibly be good.
I didn’t even tell them goodbye; I just sent out a group text saying I’d gotten sick and had to rush home. It was a lie, and a goodbye, all in one.
It would be the last they ever heard from me if I had anything to do with it. I’d failed to go rogue so many times before, but maybe this time I would succeed. There was nothing left for me to do but run. It was the only thing I was good at anyway.
I couldn’t exist another day so close to Jayce, whom I hated and ached for in equal parts. The idea of having to see him around town and pretend like I’d never been in his arms was too painful.
So, when I got home, I dug out the faded old duffle bag that I’d packed more times than I could count, and started gathering the important parts of my life I couldn’t bear to leave behind.
I was going to make it alone this time, or die trying.