Page 38 of Rejected by My Shadow Alpha (Mate to the Fallen #1)

Raven

“Who would have thought a worthless runt like you would end up getting mated into the prestigious Blackwell family?”

Ivy's cutting remark might have hurt if I hadn't spent the better part of a decade on the receiving end of similar tirades as the heir to the Ivory Moon Pack who ‘couldn't even shift’.

“Try not to sound so excited about it, cousin,” I deadpanned without a glance in her direction, accepting another offered cup of spirits from a server with a bright smile.

Nothing could dim my mood. My mating ceremony was tomorrow; tonight was my Prenuptial Bonfire, a sacred pre-mating tradition the Ivory Moon Pack still held on to despite the modern age. The ceremony might have been drawing to a close but the dancing around the bonfire was still going strong.

A low vicious growl rippled through the air as Ivy took a threatening step towards me, her blood-red hair framing golden eyes lit with the fury of her wolf.

“You—” She growled only to stop abruptly when Elias appeared in front of us, his dark hair mussed and his pale blue gaze focused on me.

“Raven,” My fiancé’s sweet shy smile lit me up from within. “I've been looking everywhere for you.”

Then he registered Ivy's presence and his smile cooled with indifference.

“Ivy,” He nodded briskly.

“Elias,” Ivy responded with a tight smile, her hateful glare quickly hidden and her eyes back to their regular brown.

“Happy Pre-nuptials,” Ivy said in farewell with a quick kiss on my cheek, her claws digging into my shoulder in the mimicry of a warm hug between cousins.

The moment Ivy was gone, Elias was at my side, his voice heavy with concern.

“Are you alright?”

“You know, just typical Ivy,” I shrugged, ignoring the slight pain in my arms from the movement.

The injuries from Ivy's claw marks would be gone in a day. Compared to what she'd done to me in the past, this was nothing.

Ever since Elder Dawson, Ivy's father adopted me and took over as regent in the Ivory Moon Pack after the death of my parents, Ivy made it her sworn duty to make my life a living hell.

In public, she was the perfect cousin to the tragic orphan, the sister I wished I never had. In private, she tormented me, never letting me forget the fact that my parents, the Alpha Couple, were dead and it was my fault.

As though he could hear my dark thoughts, Elias pulled me into a solid, comforting embrace.

“Once we are mated, no one will ever dare cross you again,” He promised fiercely and I believed him.

After all, who would dare cross the mate of Elias Blackwell, the unofficial Alpha heir of the Shadow Thorn Pack?

Even without considering their estimated net worth in the hundreds of billions, the Shadow Thorn Pack was one of the largest and most powerful werewolf packs on the North American continent.

“This will be the last night we spend apart,” Elias vowed, kissing the back of my hand after escorting me back to my room as the celebrations wrapped up.

At the sight of the soft expression on his face, I tensed already knowing what was coming. Elias didn't seem to notice as he drew closer, stars in his eyes as he leaned in to kiss me.

I stayed still.

I wanted Elias to kiss me. I wanted to kiss him.

I felt the warmth of Elias's breath on my skin, but I turned away before his lips could meet mine, and his kiss landed on my cheek.

“I'm sorry,” I whispered, unable to meet Elias’s gaze.

We'd been in a relationship for a year, engaged for six months, and getting mated by dawn, yet I could count the number of times on one hand that Elias and I had kissed passionately.

For shifters, our love wasn’t the loud and frenzied kind. Rather, it was gentle and steadfast. However the complete lack of intimacy between us was solely my failing.

I trusted Elias. I really did. I wanted to be with him with all of my being but every time he reached for me, all I could feel was a crippling sense of unexplained… fear.

Elias settled for kissing my forehead.

“It's alright,” He whispered but I could still detect the strain in his voice. “We have the rest of our lives ahead of us.”

Elias’s quiet acceptance made me feel terrible. So much so that I couldn't fall asleep after he left.

Elias was understanding, kind, sweet, supportive, and ridiculously handsome. He was everything I could have ever asked for in a future mate. Kissing him shouldn't have been nerve-wracking.

But maybe it didn't have to be. Maybe if I took the initiative for once…

I bolted upright from my bed. Hastily pulling on some clothes before my confidence could leave me, grabbing my cell phone before heading out.

Misha, my best friend, picked up on the first ring just as I anticipated she would. Her cyber security job knee-deep in human territory often kept her up longer than most wolves.

“I’m going to do it,” I informed her.

“Don't you think this is a bit drastic?” Misha sounded concerned. “Your mating ceremony is tomorrow. What’s the rush?”

I walked briskly, closing the distance between my room and the room in the guest quarters that had been assigned to Elias.

“Elias has been fully committed to this relationship but I haven't been honest with him or myself. The real reason I have been unable to be with him that way is because deep down… I was scared.”

Scared that the moment I fully committed to him, I'd lose him the same way I'd lost my parents, and I wouldn't be able to bear the loss. It was an irrational fear. One I’d let control me for far too long.

“But I’m tired of being afraid, Misha. I won't let the next step of our relationship start on this foot.”

Misha clicked her teeth worriedly.

“But Raven surely this can wait till—”

“I'll update you in the morning,” I promised, ending the call before Misha’s reasonable words could get to me.

Was this impulsive? Definitely.

But if I was going to be Elias's mate, this threshold was something I needed to cross myself.

All my bold thoughts ended the moment I reached the hallway to Elias's room.

I stared down at my casual fit feeling silly and self-conscious.

Maybe I should have worn something lacy, seductive or—

The sound of an almost pained, low-pitched grunt filled the air, and I paused.

Did that come from Elias's room?

I hurried down the hallway—

“Ivy,” A familiar voice grunted, the sound followed by unmistakable wet sucking noises. “You're so fucking perfect.”

No.

No.

No.

It couldn't be.

I took a step forward even as my entire body told me to leave and from the small crack between Elias's partly open room door and the frame, I witnessed a scene I could never have imagined unfolding.

Elias was still in his clothes from the earlier ceremony, only his pants were now at his knees, his face tense, his hips thrusting and his fingers buried in the hair of the redhead kneeling at his feet.

The woman pulled back from him, her tongue moving teasingly against his erection.

“Better than that frigid bitch you are getting mated to tomorrow?” Ivy quipped.

Something in me shriveled and died.

My fiancé, the man I was getting mated to in hours, the man who'd just held me outside my room, the man who'd promised me forever was cheating on me with my cousin.

It couldn't be. It just couldn't. But the evidence was right in front of me.

“Are you still mad about earlier?” Elias seemed frustrated at Ivy's abrupt pause.

“You know I'm only playing this sweetheart role for you. Because you want this damn pack. Once she gives me the Alpha position tomorrow, I can reject her and take you as my mate, giving you the Ivory Moon Pack you've always desired.”

My knees went weak, another avalanche of betrayal hitting me.

Our relationship had all been an act for Ivy to steal my birthright?

Ivy straightened from her crouch, refusing to be pacified.

“You kissed her during the ceremony,” She pouted.

Elias wrapped his arms around Ivy, kissing his way up her neck.

“I also deceived her into signing over her shares in Ivory Enterprise to you last week,” His lips touched hers. “Why would I bother myself with something so petty if I wasn't fully committed to you, Ivy?”

I went completely still with shock as I recalled how Elias had dropped in at the office to assist me since I was completely swamped between work and the preparations for our pre-mating ceremonies.

Grateful for his help and completely drained, I'd signed so many documents that day, some with barely a cursory glance and Elias's input on what was important and what wasn't.

Ivy's bad mood dissipated with a single dark chuckle of amusement.

“That wolfless runt won't know what hit her tomorrow,” She remarked, her red lips curving into a seductive smile as she stared up at Elias. “How can I thank you for this gift, my love?”

Before Elias could respond, she was on her knees again taking him back into her mouth.

My chest hurt with the intensity of pain so gut-wrenching that it felt almost physical. But I wasn't just hurt, I was enraged.

I wanted to charge in and demand an explanation from the man I’d thought I loved. To wring Ivy’s neck and ask what I had ever done to her to make her go this far to get to me.

But the survival instincts honed from years of being bullied and pitted against Ivy’s viciousness didn't let me.

Ivy was extremely strong for a Beta wolf, and Elias was an Alpha while I was... a wolfless runt, as Ivy so accurately said. After losing my wolf that night a decade ago, I was barely stronger than a human. If I walked into that room, there was little chance I would come out unscathed if at all.

So, with shaky hands that didn't seem to belong to me, I pulled out my cell phone, made a video recording of the couple, and left.

I just left.

I'd barely made it a few meters from the guesthouse when the nausea hit me, and I puked into the garden bed.

A sob of pain and anguish left my throat and I crumbled on the cold hard ground.

I hated myself for being so weak that I couldn't even confront them. For being so stupid that I had never seen through Elias's act. But mostly, it just hurt. A lot.

Because once more, I'd lost someone I loved. Only this time unlike with my parents, I hadn't really lost Elias— I'd never had him to begin with.

It was all a lie. Everything.

My phone buzzed, the screen lighting up as a message came in.

Misha: Good luck!

My chest hurt as I stared at the message, stared beyond it at the lock screen that was a quirky selfie of Elias, and I frozen mid-laugh.

Had all of it truly been a lie?

And why the hell was l still crying over someone who wasn't worth my tears?

I cleaned up and wiped my tears, heading for the pack's garage.

There was no way I could go back to my room tonight, see my dress hanging in the corner, my shoes and jewelry already laid out for my mating ceremony in the morning, and not lose my mind.

The wolves on duty, mostly drunk and distracted by the festivities, easily let my car through the gates unquestioned.

Tomorrow, I would confront Elias and Ivy in front of the pack and call off our mating ceremony. Tomorrow I would decide what to do about my stolen inheritance.

But for tonight… for tonight, I just wanted to rage, cry, and sob privately, where no one could hear me or smell my emotions.

Naturally, the only decent hotel still open was farther from the pack than I had intended and fully booked except for a recently vacated room the help was still cleaning out.

Maybe I should have just stayed in my room.

“I'll take it.”

“The room will be ready in twenty minutes,” The receptionist took my payment with a practiced smile. “You can check out our bar in the meantime.”

With the night I had, if there was ever a good reason to get drunk, I had it.

I’d taken one step into the bar when it hit me.

My stomach lurched, my heart palpitating hard as though I had just run a marathon. I went completely still, my skin feeling too tight, my palms too sweaty and my head spun as though the alcohol I'd consumed hours ago at the bonfire was just kicking in.

Then I heard a low growl that had my hackles rising.

I took a step back instinctively raising my head to meet the golden gaze of a predator stalking towards me, his nostrils flared.

My instincts slammed into me and I broke out into a run.