Page 92 of Reckless At Raleigh High

“All right. Noted. Noted.” She’s still grinning nervously, unable to keep still; I slowly walk around her, making a show of studying her closely. “Nasa called and they’ve invited you to become their youngest ever astronaut.”

She rolls her eyes. “Do you have any idea how much studying I have to do before they’ll even think about letting me near a shuttle, Alex? There’s a reason why astronauts are ancient by the time they get to go up.”

“Okaaay. So...your Dad told you he’s dating Maeve, and you’re excited about getting a new mom?”

She freezes, eyes growing wide. “What?”

“Never mind. Joking. I’m joking. What are you so excited about,Argento? The suspense is killing me.”

“Go back to what you said about my dad and Maeve.”

“Or you could just pretend I didn’t breathe a word about that and spill your guts instead.” Having circled her fully twice, I come to a stop in front of her and plant my hands on her hips, snatching her up off the ground. She squeals, wrapping her legs around my waist, her tits crushing up against my chest, and my dick begins to throb hopefully.

God, you are never satisfied,I tell it. Unfortunately, the universe might have seen fit to give my cock a mind of its own, but it neglected to give it ears. It doesn’t listen.

Silver, so breathtakingly beautiful in the summer dress she’s wearing—the material’s a rich blue tone that really brings out her eyes—laces are arms around my neck, planting a delicate kiss on my forehead, right between my eyebrows. “I did something for you in the bedroom. I hope you don’t mind.”

“Inevermind when you do things for me in the bedroom.”

“You’re so bad,” she laughs. “Come on. Put me down. I wanna show you.”

“You sure you wanna show me? ’Cause you’re looking a little panicked right now.”

“I’m not panicked! I’m just…” She shrugs, her cheeks coloring. She’s definitely panicking. “I’m just hoping I haven’t taken over something that you wanted to do is all.” It’s too damn easy to screw with her sometimes. She’s goddamn adorable when she’s embarrassed.

“Fuck,” I rumble, butting her nose with mine. “You bought yourself a strap-on, didn’t you? Kinky. I’m a firm believer that the anus is anouthole, but I’ll try anything once if it’ll make you happy.”

She looks scandalized. “I donotwant to dominate you with a strap-on. Wherever you got that idea from, you can send it right back because it’s never gonna happen. Ju—for fuck’s sake, come with me. We’ll be here all night otherwise.” She grabs me by the hand, and that’s it, she’s physically dragging me through to the bedroom.

There are physics textbooks and notebooks all over the bed—she’s been studying hard while I was gone—but there are also plastic wrappers and cardboard packaging all over the floor, too. “Looks like you had a party in here without me. What have you been up to,Arge—” I stop talking, because when I back at her, Iseewhat she’s been up to. Opposite our bed, dozens of picture frames have been mounted on the wall in a collage style, slotted together like a jigsaw puzzle. From plain black wood, to raw pine, to fancy old fashioned gilded gold, every single picture frame is different. Like, not a single one of them matches any of the others. Of course, inside the frames are Giacomo’s drawings of my mom. But not only that. There are photos of Ben in the frames, too. Pictures I’ve never even seen before. Shots of him playing baseball and posing with his friends. And, oh god…there…there are pictures of me and him together, too. Selfies I took for him on his phone, for him to keep, so that he knew I was always going to be there for him.

I sit down heavily on the bed, right on top of one of Silver’s textbooks.

She looks at me worriedly, covering her mouth with her hands again. “I’m sorry. I know…it’s a lot, isn’t it? It’s like…I just went and ahead and gathered up everything that made you hurt and I plastered it all over our bedroom wall. God, I’m so stupid. I can…fuck, I can take it down. I’m sorry.” She lifts a picture of Ben from the wall, looking for somewhere to put it so she can take down the others, too.

“Silver, stop,” I say softly.

“God, I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I have no idea what I was thinking.”

“I love it, Silver.”

“You don’t have to say that.”

“I know I don’t. Please, just…Silver, wait, wait, wait. Don’t take that down. Listen to me.I love it.”

She sniffs, daring to glance over at me. Her eyes look glassy, like she’s on the verge of tears. Her pain is enough to have me back on my feet and hurrying across the bedroom to her. “Seriously, please do not cry,Argento. I’m not upset. It’s fucking beautiful, what you’ve done for me. I adore it. I love it. I wanna keep it. It was just a lot to take in all at once is all. I just needed a beat to process it.” I cup Silver’s hand with my face, and she leans into my palm, closing her eyes. Sniffing, she says, “You don’t talk about him. I know how much it must still hurt.”

Just to prove how right she is, my chest squeezes sharply, grief tightening around my heart like a fist. Normally I’d avoid this conversation, moving onto a lighter topic, but that’s the whole point, isn’t it? Silver notices when I do that and she takes note. “Some days, it feels like I should shut myself away from the world and never show my face again. The guilt…the guilt’s crushing. I know, I know. Before you say it, I know his death wasn’t my fault. Not really. Itwasan accident. But he should have been in Hawaii, Silver. He should have been playing soccer on a beach, and instead Jackie was bringing him back to see me. I’m gonna have to live with that knowledge somehow. Some days, Ican’tlive with it. It feels like I’ll die from the weight of that knowledge, pressing down on me.”

I take a shaky breath, pausing while I pull my shit together. “Other days are easier, though. The sadness lets up for a minute, or an hour, and I get to remember the good stuff. I get to laugh at the goofy, stupid shit we’d do together. And I think those minutes and those hours will become more frequent, the more time passes. It’s fucked up, y’know. A part of me doesn’t want to stop being sad. It feels like, if I stop being sad all of the time, I’m betraying him. Forgetting him.”

“You’re never gonna forget him. He’s a part of you, just like you were a part of him. He’s going to be with you for the rest of the life, no matter where you go or what you. You’ll live your life for him, and experience as many things as you can.For him.” The way she looks up at me makes everything come into focus. She’s a lens. I look into her eyes, and everything that has been blurry and confusing for the better part of a lifetime suddenly just…makes sense. She is cool water, after years of thirst. A soothing balm, after far too much hurt.

“And soon, we’re going to have a family of our own…” she says, trailing off.

I carefully tuck a rogue strand of her hair behind her ear, aching to kiss her. I hold back, though. “Hmm. A family. You’re saying you actuallywantme to knock you up one of these days?”

Smiling, trying not to, suddenly shy, Silver nods. “Yes,” she says quietly. “One of these days. When we’re done with college, and we’ve learned the lessons we need to learn, I am going to want that more than anything, Alessandro Moretti. One day, we’ll have a son of our own. And you are going to be an amazing father, you know that?”

Fear prickles at the back of my neck, a thousand worries and concerns trying to make themselves heard all at once. I shut them down with one quiet thought, though: Silver believes I’ll be a good father, and so I will. For her, I’ll be anything she believes I can be.

“A son?” I muse.

Still a little shy, Silver dips her head, but she manages to look up at me when she tells me in a firm, unwavering voice, “Yes. And when we meet him for the very first time, we will call him Ben.”