Page 21 of Realms of Shadow and Sun (A World of Sun and Shadow #3)

Sion couldn't believe he was finally returning home to the Snow Lands. After he crossed back through the portal to return to the Shadow Realm, he thought he'd never see them again. He knew he had Renya to thank for that, and he would never stop being indebted to her.

He lifted his face up to the sun, feeling the warmth hit his cheeks and brow. After spending so much time in the darkness of the Shadow Realm, the sun energized him and made him feel like a new man. Sion still had scars, both physical and mental, that would stay with him for the rest of his life. But riding on Phillippe's horse, Nectaria, with a slight breeze fluttering the open neckline of his tunic, felt like a rebirth.

"You better watch where you're going,"

Selenia said from slightly behind him.

They'd traveled into the night without stopping, and now it was almost midday. They hardly spoke, and Sion knew Selenia was lost in her own thoughts. He himself took Jurel's passing incredibly hard, but he didn't know how close Selenia and Jurel were until Grayden took him aside and provided him with the facts of Jurel's passing. He made sure to give Selenia space, also while protecting his best friend's little sister.

Selenia caught up to him, and he studied her features. Although she wore a large hat to protect her fair complexion, it was clear that she was no longer the churlish girl he'd chased away with play swords and teased for most of his life. Her auburn ringlets hung prettily behind her shoulders, and her posture had changed. She carried herself with more grace, and took herself a little more seriously than she did before. Sion wasn't sure if it was the loss of youth or the loss of Jurel that changed her so significantly.

As she rode beside him, Sion found his gaze lingering on the curve of her neck, the way her riding clothes hugged her figure. He quickly averted his eyes, surprised by his own thoughts.

"Are we near where you made camp before?"

Sion asked, his voice slightly rougher than he intended. They planned to rest during the most intense heat of the day, and then take off again during the cooler evening hours. Their route would take them past the Spring Lands into the Snow Lands. It was a much more direct route than heading back to the Twilight Kingdom and up the Mountain Pass.

Selenia looked around, her eyes shaded by her hat. "Yes, I think it's just behind this dune."

Sure enough, the small cave came into view. The pair dismounted and walked towards it, with all three horses trailing behind them.

"Wait, stop,"

Sion said as Selenia went to enter the cave.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I hope. I just want to check it and make sure nothing is in there before you go in."

"It was fine earlier,"

she argued.

"Absolutely not. I will see you safely to the Snow Lands, Selenia."

Sion entered the cave and came back out almost immediately. "It's all clear."

"Told you,"

Selenia said under her breath. Sion just shook his head. That was the Selenia he remembered. Quick to argue, quick to anger, and even quicker to forgive. He ignored her comment and began to unpack the saddle bags. Selenia started to help, carrying a small trunk over to the cave.

As if in slow motion, he watched Selenia drop the trunk, close her eyes and then fall into the desert sand.

"Selenia!"

he yelled, dropping the supplies he was carrying and rushing over to her. He felt her face, and noticed she was incredibly clammy and even paler than usual. He bent down and scooped her up, careful to support her head. Once he was inside the cave, he laid her down carefully on the floor.

"Selenia, wake up!"

Sion patted her cheeks gently, and then ran back to the horses to grab the water pouches. He hurried back to the cave, and felt her forehead again. She was sweating profusely and needed to cool down.

Gods, forgive me for this, he thought, as he undid the buttons at her collar. He continued unbuttoning until her silk shirt was completely open. He averted his eyes, trying hard not to notice the skimpy bralette she wore. He said a silent prayer, hoping that Grayden would never find out that he saw his sister in her undergarments.

He removed her shirt completely and soaked it in water from one of the water skins, and then began wiping her face gently with the damp shirt. "Selenia, come on. Wake up,"

he whispered gently. "Please!"

He untied her sunhat and removed it. Her hair was silky smooth under his fingers, so much different than Cressida's coarse hair.

Finally, one of her eyelids began to flutter. "Thank the Fates!"

he exclaimed, relief flooding through him.

"What happened?"

Selenia asked, her voice a dry whisper as she regained consciousness.

"You got overheated and fainted. You can't travel in those clothes, at least not through the desert."

She looked down, realizing she was exposed. Her hands went to cover herself, but Sion shook his head. "No time to be modest, Selenia. You need to cool down fast and drink. Now."

He pressed one of the water pouches to her lips and she drank greedily. After a few sips, he took it away from her.

"More,"

she said, her lips patched and cracked.

"I'm sorry, Selenia. You need to rehydrate slowly."

She nodded weakly and attempted to sit up, struggling.

"Stay here, I'll go get the sleeping rolls."

"Where am I going to go?"

she teased, weakly, but with a slight smile.

Sion's breathing finally returned to normal. Grayden would have killed him if something happened to her. Fates, he would kill himself. Selenia was sweet and innocent, and needed to live a full life.

He grabbed the trunk she dropped, as well as the sleeping rolls. He brought them back to the cave, setting the trunk in the corner and unrolling the sleeping rolls. Once he was satisfied with their arrangement, he walked over to Selenia, and picked her up in his arms.

"Sion, I can walk!"

she protested, but rested her head on his shoulder.

"I'm not going to take any chances with you,"

he said, and laid her down carefully on the bed roll. He grabbed the water skin and pressed it to her lips again, allowing her a few sips.

"How are you feeling?"

"I have a pretty bad headache, and my shoulder hurts from where I fell."

Sion frowned. "Let me look at your shoulder. It might need to be wrapped."

Selenia obeyed, and turned her back so Sion could examine her. He tried to be gentle, but she winced sharply as he palpated her shoulder. His fingers brushed against her bare skin, and he felt a jolt of electricity run through him. He quickly pulled his hand away, confused by his reaction.

"I'm so sorry, Selenia. I think it might be dislocated. I could pop it back into place, but with your fainting spell, I'm afraid it will be too painful and you'll lose consciousness again. I'd rather wait until we are home and have Almory look at it. He can give you something for the pain."

She nodded, trying to pull her shirt back on.

"It's too hot for that blouse, Selenia. Do you have anything else?"

"I have...a nightgown. It's in the trunk."

Sion wasted no time, and started rifling through her belongings. He pulled out a lightweight silk nightgown. It only had thin straps to hold it up, and Sion felt guilty that she'd have to be dressed so immodestly in front of him. But, survival was more important, he told himself.

As he pulled out the nightgown, he noticed a large, carefully wrapped package that fell to the bottom of the trunk.

"Selenia, what's this?"

She looked almost embarrassed. "It's...a wedding dress. When I bought my hat from the market in the Sun Realm, I saw it in the shop, and I knew it was meant for Renya."

Sion was speechless. He was away from the Snow Lands for so long, he forgot how selfless Selenia could be. He tucked the dress back carefully, and closed the lid to the trunk.

"Selenia, that was incredibly sweet of you."

She brushed off his praise. "As much as I like to give him a bad time, I love my brother. I know he'll love Renya in that dress, and I want her to feel like the princess she is when she marries him."

Sion helped Selenia into the nightgown, trying to avert his eyes as much as possible. However, he couldn't help but notice the way the silk clung to her curves, the thin fabric leaving little to the imagination. He swallowed hard, pushing away the unwelcome thoughts.

Sion watched Selenia sleep, still concerned after her fainting spell. He stared as her chest rose and fell, her breathing slow and easy. Leaning against the wall of the cave, he closed his eyes for a little bit, trying to protect them from the dry heat of the desert.

"No! Please, no!"

Sobs came from the corner where Selenia slept. Sion opened his eyes and saw her thrashing and moaning.

"Gods, please don't!"

Her entire body trembled. Without thinking, Sion pulled her onto his lap and held her close to his chest. His arms wrapped around her tightly so she wouldn't injure her shoulder any more than it already was.

"Shhh...it's okay, darling. It's just a bad dream."

He stroked her hair carefully. Her body was covered in a sheen of sweat, but he didn't care. He just continued to rock her, murmuring comforting words into the shell of her ear. Finally, she pulled herself out of the nightmare and looked around at the cave and where she sat on Sion's lap. She tried to push herself away, but Sion held on to her tightly.

"Stay here a moment longer, I don't want you to faint again, especially after you've worked yourself up into a sweat."

At least, that was what he told Selenia. He surprised himself, enjoying the comfort her lithe body provided, resting easily on his lap. It had been so long since he'd had contact like this. Gentle and tender, easy and sweet. Cressida tortured every inch of him, and he forgot how good a woman's touch could be. He breathed in deeply, smelling the floral scent seeming to surround her, even in the dry and desolate desert.

Selenia held incredibly still, not responding to him, yet not fighting him either. Her injured shoulder was hanging limply. Sion could feel the warmth of her body through the thin nightgown, and he found himself acutely aware of every point of contact between them.

"Sion?"

she asked tentatively.

"I get nightmares too,"

he confessed, closing his eyes and pressing his forehead against hers. "The last six months have been...excruciating for me."

He squeezed his eyes shut, trying hard not to relive them in his thoughts.

"Sion...what exactly occurred at the Shadow Realm?"

Selenia pulled herself back, tears in her eyes from her nightmare, but concern for him in her gaze. He closed his eyes again, ashamed and unsure if this was something he wanted to share. Grayden and Renya knew, as well as Phillippe, but it appeared as if Selenia was sheltered from the truth.

He kept silent, his eyes open but downcast and focusing on her bare shoulder as he held her. Her nightgown's strap slipped down her upper arm, revealing smooth, pale skin. Without thinking, without realizing what he was doing, he placed a soft kiss there.

She looked at him, puzzled, but didn't push him off. Instead, he felt her shiver slightly, her breath catching. "Sion, tell me what happened to you."

Her tone was soft, but commanding.

He sighed and held her closer, looking past her shoulders and at the wall of the cave. He couldn't make this kind of confession with her looking at him.

"While I was at the Shadow Realm, I became...a plaything of Cressida's. She used my body, tried to break my spirit and infiltrate my mind. Selenia, some of the things she did to me..."

he trailed off, holding back the tears that threatened to fall. He never thought he would have to deal with the ramifications of what transpired in her castle. He thought he would die and never have to deal with the trauma of it. But seeing Selenia, shaking from her own nightmare, made him realize that they would never be free from the reach of Cressida. Even if she was defeated and put down, the invisible scars of her cruel reign would mar them forever.

"Oh, Sion..."

Selenia pulled him closer to her, clinging to him like a life preserver with her injured arm. "I'm so sorry that happened to you."

He picked his head up and looked into her eyes. Sion never realized the depth they held, the raw emotion tucked just behind her playful banter. He saw pain there, not just for herself, but for him too. As if his body had a mind of its own, he pressed his lips gently to hers.

She inhaled deeply, shocked by his actions, but then tentatively moved her mouth with his. Her kiss was shy and inexperienced, but that made it all the sweeter for Sion. After the bleakness and evil he was surrounded with, her goodness and innocence seemed like a fresh wind, blown in from the pure, crisp air of the Snow Lands.

He parted her lips slowly with his, needing more, and then deepened their kiss. Selenia wrapped her good arm around his neck, and he couldn't believe how right it felt, to have her like this, kissing him back. His hand slid down her back, feeling the silk of her nightgown and the warmth of her skin beneath. Selenia made a small noise in the back of her throat, a mix of surprise and pleasure, and Sion felt his body respond.

Suddenly, guilt and self-hatred filled his belly and he pulled back, horrified by what he had done. The loss of contact was almost painful, and he had to resist the urge to pull her close again.

"Selenia, I'm so sorry. I don't know what came over me. You were scared and upset and I...I just needed to feel something good for a change. I don't know what possessed me to take advantage of you like that."

He carefully lifted her off his lap and back down onto her sleeping roll, fighting against every instinct that told him to keep her close. "Please don't hate me."

Confusion, and perhaps something else that he couldn't detect—desire, maybe?—burned brightly on her face. "It's okay,"

she said in a small voice. "We are both broken, both shells of who we used to be. Fate knows that we could both use a little pleasure."

Her words sent a jolt through him, and he had to clench his fists to keep from reaching for her again. "It can't happen again. Your brothers trust me with your life. I won't bring shame to your family and dishonor you. Please, forgive me. You should get some rest. I'm going to sleep outside."

Before she could respond, he swept out of the cave, positioning himself at the entrance. His dark skin protected him from the damage of the sun, and he lay there on the hot sand for over an hour, sleep eluding him, trying to get the memory of Selenia's lips against his out of his mind. The feel of her body against his, the softness of her skin, the little noises she made—it all played on repeat in his head.

As the sun began to set, Sion knew they would need to continue their journey soon. But for now, he remained outside, torn between his duty to protect Selenia and the unexpected feelings she had stirred within him. Whatever happened next, he knew their relationship had irrevocably changed, and he wasn't sure if he was ready to face the consequences.