Page 8 of Raised at Rosings (Elizabeth and Darcy True Love Multiverse #4)
Chapter Seven
Elizabeth was insanely grateful when the butler entered the room and announced dinner. In his characteristically cheeky way, Richard approached his aunt, extending his arm with a flourish that was as exaggerated as it was unconvincing. With a frustrated huff, she snatched his arm and exited the room, her posture stiff and full of outrage. This left Mr. Darcy able to offer an arm to Anne. They walked to the dining room in silence, which Elizabeth supposed was to Lady Catherine’s liking. Following behind them all, Elizabeth shook her head. Lady Catherine probably thought they did not speak out of respect for her. Lost in her own world, Lady Catherine couldn’t comprehend that their silence stemmed from the profound disgust and outrage they felt.
Their meal progressed in silence, and Elizabeth wondered if Lady Catherine had not yet recovered from the stand that Mr. Darcy had made. Normally, she was the sort to lecture throughout the meal when given the opportunity and an audience. It was a relief to be able to enjoy the relative peace, even if she found the meal unpalatable. She did not have an opportunity to talk with Mr. Darcy until they removed to the Music room.
“I believe music is in order,” announced Lady Catherine. She looked down her nose at Elizabeth, her gaze icy and sharp, and added, “Miss Bennet, if you would.”
Elizabeth maintained a polite facade until her back was to Lady Catherine. Then, with a subtle, almost imperceptible twitch of her lips, Elizabeth rolled her eyes. Who else was going to provide musical entertainment? Lady Catherine had never learned an instrument, having given up early in the endeavor according to Uncle Lewis. Anne, on the other hand, had never been permitted to take lessons.
Going through the sheet music, Elizabeth searched for something Lady Catherine might approve of. Mr. Darcy approached, just as she had picked something out, and inquired, “Would you permit me to offer my services to turn the pages, Miss Elizabeth?”
Smiling up at him, Elizabeth nodded and said, “That would be most welcome, Mr. Darcy.” Settling on the bench, Elizabeth smoothed out her dress and Mr. Darcy stood at her side, ready to turn the pages as she played the sonata she had chosen.
For a time, she focused on falling into the pattern of the notes and the emotions that they evoked. It was not easy with Lady Catherine lecturing in the background about how, if she had learned, she would be more proficient than a mere companion. Elizabeth stumbled over several notes on hearing herself called such. It was one thing to know that Lady Catherine meant to relegate her to the life of a servant. It was entirely another thing to hear herself demeaned in front of two people that she respected.
“Pay her no mind, Miss Elizabeth,” murmured Mr. Darcy as he stood next to her. “She’s so caught up in her own misguided ignorance that she is utterly oblivious to the truth right before her eyes.”
Elizabeth glanced up at Mr. Darcy, a smile ghosting about her lips. Her fingers danced along the keys more confidently as she looked at Mr. Darcy. Feeling playful, she asked, “What truth is that?”
Mr. Darcy, his voice low and measured, turned the page for her before saying, “While you may not have the grand parentage that my aunt claims, you, Miss Elizabeth, exhibit more refinement and integrity in a day than she ever shown in her whole life.” Pausing briefly, he then quietly added, “I believe her aggression stems from feeling threatened by you, as you embody what she herself pretends to be.”
A hot blush spread across Elizabeth’s cheeks, and she knew that she could do nothing about it. She could not remember ever being so complemented or ever felt so muddled. How was it that this was the same man who had insulted her so badly all those years ago? She knew he had apologized, but how had his view of her changed so much in only a few years?
Swallowing, Elizabeth had to force her fingers to continue to move. Thank goodness she had chosen a piece that she knew fairly well. Still, she had to ask, “What do you suppose Lady Catherine is pretending to be?”
“A lady of worth,” came his honest reply.
They might have moved on to another topic had Lady Catherine not interrupted them by saying, “This will not do. You are talking too much for a proper performance. If you cannot do it correctly, Bennet, then it is better that you should stop and remove yourself from the instrument.”
Scoffing, Richard was quick to speak up. “Aunt, do not be ridiculous. It is not as if she is playing a concerto for the king and queen. This is a small family gathering. It is meant to be enjoyed by everyone, including Elizabeth and Darcy.”
Lady Catherine was too restrained to roll her eyes, but she certainly looked down her nose at her nephew. “I am the Lady of this house. As mistress, I have the authority to say or do whatever I want. If I want to tell my daughter’s companion to stop playing, I can.”
“I know you must mean to say your daughter’s friend and companion. Elizabeth is not employed to be a companion. She was Uncle Lewis’s ward. My parents have embraced Jane, her older sister, as a beloved member of our family. By extension, Elizabeth is family as well, a family member whom I hold dear and will not see misused.” From where she sat, Elizabeth could easily see the hard lines of Richard’s face. Even though he never enlisted in the military as he intended, Elizabeth could imagine how he would have appeared facing an enemy on the battlefield at that moment. Richard held his ground, his voice unwavering, his authority absolute. Whatever she was thinking, Lady Catherine’s reaction was only a slight widening of her eyes before they narrowed in ire.
There was a moment of heavy silence as the room waited for whoever was going to make the next move. Elizabeth found her gaze swiveling from one strong-willed opponent to the other. It was a relative surprise when it was Anne who broke the stalemate by saying, “As much as I enjoy your playing, Lizzie, I am tired and must retire for the night.”
Jumping up from the piano bench, Elizabeth moved to her side, murmuring, “It seems we both yearn for the comfort of rest. We have had a long day, and our hearts are heavy with grief. Let us go up together.”
The act of bidding everyone goodnight seemed to dispel the powder keg of animosity, at least slightly. After all, one couldn’t claim to be part of civilization without adhering to certain social graces, however put out one might be. Elizabeth accepted the hug Richard offered, whispering, “You know that as long as Anne wishes to stay here, I will stay by her side. While I am grateful for your powerful show of support, I need you to remember that I will have to live here with Lady Catherine after you return to Matlock. Do not do something foolish.”
Richard chuckled softly, a barely audible sound that belied the tense set of his shoulders. A crinkle appeared in his eyes as he looked down at her and said, “I will mind my tongue if that’s your wish, but I remain concerned. My aunt grows more self-important with every passing moment. Already she has made herself a throne to sit on. She will soon become too entrenched to topple easily.”
Sighing, Elizabeth nodded and hurried to catch up with Anne as she walked towards the stairs. Elizabeth understood the perilous nature of the game she was about to play, yet she would take the chance. If this was how Anne wanted to handle things, she had promised to try. She was not about to back out just because she feared the outcome.
Darcy waited impatiently in the empty hall, hoping to catch Miss Elizabeth as she emerged from the house and onto the garden path. Perry had been good enough to inquire about Miss Elizabeth’s habits from the staff. They discovered she shared his habit of waking early, often enjoying a refreshing stroll as the sun rose. He wanted to get the chance to speak with her about the situation at Rosings without interference from his more hotheaded cousin or supercilious aunt.
There was also the matter of their promised conversation that never happened. A strange disappointment settled over Darcy after Miss Elizabeth’s premature departure the night before. For some reason that he could not quite place, he had been looking forward to confiding in Miss Elizabeth about the loss of his father and Darcy was determined to follow through this morning.
Movement at the kitchen door had Darcy standing straighter as he watched Miss Elizabeth exit the house and shut the door quietly behind her. He cleared his throat, a subtle sound in the tranquil morning, to avoid startling her. Miss Elizabeth’s face lit up with a smile when she spotted him waiting for her and Darcy found himself wanting to smile in return. Never before had he found himself so drawn in to another person’s emotions and for all that he found it odd he did not hesitate to smile back at her.
“Mr. Darcy, do you have need of something, or have you simply come to greet me?” she asked.
With hushed steps, Darcy approached Elizabeth, his voice a low murmur as he said, “Actually, I had hoped that you would not mind if I joined you on your morning walk. We did not have that conversation I promised last night, and I did not want to miss the opportunity.”
Miss Elizabeth took his offered arm without hesitation and said, “I would love to have company on my walk, Mr. Darcy. Anne’s health is too poor to accompany me, so it will be a rare joy to share the sunrise.”
They both took a moment to look to the east and appreciate the rosy glow that was emerging over the trees. By some silent agreement, they moved together down the garden path. They had walked some distance, the sounds of birds chirping a gentle melody in the background, before Darcy finally ventured to say, “Before I forget Georgianna, my younger sister wanted me to convey her most sincere condolences to both you and Anne.”
Looking up at him, her face earnest, Miss Elizabeth gushed, “Oh, that is so sweet of her. Tell her thank you for me.”
“You could write her and tell her yourself if you wish. I am sure she would enjoy the opportunity to exchange letters with a young lady closer to her in age.” Though the comment had been made with little thought once the words left his mouth, Darcy realized that it was a splendid idea to have Elizabeth exchange letters with Georgianna. He had only recently realized that Georgianna was lonely without friends her own age, and in Miss Elizabeth there was a chance at a meaningful friendship.
“I would very much enjoy writing to your sister. She must be entering her teen years by now. What is she, thirteen, fourteen?” asked Miss Elizabeth.
His reply was swift and simple, “Georgianna is thirteen; she is ten years younger than I am.”
Just as Darcy rounded a corner into the fragrant rose garden, the scent of a thousand blooms filling the air, Elizabeth asked, “I’m curious, with such a large age difference, how are you both navigating your sibling relationship now that your father is gone?”
Her question required Darcy to think for a moment before answering. “It has been an adjustment. Father’s death has left me in charge of her care, along with Richard, and neither of us has any experience with young girls and what they need to thrive. More than that, I was away at school for much of her life, so we did not have much of a basis to build a relationship on, but I think we are growing close.”
Chuckling softly, Miss Elizabeth said, “I once told Uncle Lewis that it was not fair that boys got to go away to school and learn all that they did.”
Part of Darcy wanted to laugh at such an unusual idea, but he caught himself before he did. Uncle Lewis had told him that Miss Elizabeth had been an eager student, so it would make a certain amount of sense that she would have wanted to take advantage of any opportunity to learn. Curious, he asked, “How did he react to that?”
“I am afraid I quite shocked him, though after he recovered, he asked if I would also like to be away from Rosings for years at a time, spending all of my time with strangers. I did not like that idea very much at all, which seemed to satisfy Uncle Lewis, but I mourned the opportunity to learn. Uncle Lewis’s offer of tutoring filled me with joy; I eagerly accepted, relishing the prospect of learning at home with Anne nearby.” Miss Elizabeth paused, leaning over to smell one of the newly budding roses.
Darcy could not help but be charmed by the way she relished nature, her tender smile enjoying something so simple, so completely. She was so unlike the many women of the ton who would have never noticed the rose, let alone enjoy its fragrance. Such women judged value by price alone; Miss Elizabeth, conversely, would probably reject costly perfume, finding the delicate fragrance of a rose infinitely more appealing.
Turning away from the rose, Miss Elizabeth looked up at him and asked, “Between Eton and Cambridge, I’ve heard it can take upwards of eight years, with only brief, infrequent trips home allowed. Did it bother you to be away from home for so long?”
Surprised by her question, it took Darcy a moment to compose his answer, but the silence between them was not uncomfortable. They walked down the rose-lined path while he thought and eventually, he said, “My only true regret was that my time away from Pemberley meant that my relationship with my younger sister was practically nonexistent until I was done with school.”
When Miss Elizabeth looked eager to hear more, Darcy continued, “I was always a studious boy, so I enjoyed learning, but school was a shock. It did not help that my mother passed away only a short time before I was sent to school, and I was by no means handling her death well. My reticence made it difficult to make friends. Sadly, it was a habit that persisted all the way into Cambridge. Frankly, though, home was not a place that I think I would have fared much better. My father was unbending and intolerant. He offered no comfort, consumed by the weight of the Darcy legacy and his expectations of me as a representative of the Darcy name, not a grieving child. To make matters worse, he became more demanding with every year that passed by, requiring a ridged adherence to what he thought was required of a Darcy. Though I question his methods, I’ve become a man who effectively oversees Pemberley and its estates, providing for my tenants and servants and maintaining a respected position. My father’s approach, therefore, had some merit, I suppose.”
With unexpected strength, Miss Elizabeth pulled him to a halt by gripping his coat and declared, “You have turned into a man of note in spite of your father not because of him. I will not speak badly of a man who has passed, but I would suggest that the best traits that I see in you are not something you learned from your father. Rather, they are the parts of you—your kindness, your strength, your defiance—that he couldn’t extinguish.”
Elizabeth saw the confusion etched on Mr. Darcy’s face, his brow furrowed in a way that spoke of bewilderment. Though she knew she was overstepping the boundaries of what a young lady might get away with, especially on a walk alone with a gentleman, she continued to lecture him, the words tumbling from her lips like a waterfall. “You stood up to Lady Catherine last night and insisted that I not sit on that stool. You defied her, and it was your inner kindness that prompted such an action. I may be wrong, but the type of man your father was urging you to emulate wouldn’t stoop to such behavior, I think. The very idea seems contrary to the man you have described. His sort of Darcy would have ignored Lady Catherine’s behavior and allowed her to get away with behaving poorly. But you did not, and I am very grateful for your actions.”
“I have not always been so.” Shaking his head ruefully, Mr. Darcy continued, “You may remember the comments I made that inspired you to kick me in the shin?”
Chuckling, Elizabeth found herself unexpectedly leaning into Mr. Darcy before jerking herself upright. “We all have bad days, Mr. Darcy. I can tell that you are striving to better yourself, as any person of true worth is wont to do. Life, like a river, is not stagnant; we must keep flowing, growing, or we’ll miss the person we were meant to be, the landscapes we could have seen.”
Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy continued their walk, their steps synchronized, the soft sound of the breeze accompanying their progress. Feeling slightly foolish for her grandiose statements, Elizabeth had just started to relax when Mr. Darcy said, “That is a remarkably mature idea for a lady of your tender years. Did you come up with it yourself or were you inspired by something?”
“I half remember my father saying something similar before he passed. I was seven and had been struggling with something, though I do not remember what now. It is one of my only true memories of him. The rest of my memories of him are more ephemeral. I remember the feeling of his voice, a deep resonant hum against my skin as he held me while he read aloud, and the lingering scent of pipe tobacco and polished wood from his study. He died not a month later and my life change forever.” Elizabeth was glad that her feet had long ago memorized the path because her eyes had grown misty as she remembered her father.
Mr. Darcy surprised her when he offered her a handkerchief. “It sounds as if you had a wonderful father for all that he did not stay in your life for long.”
Elizabeth blotted her eyes and smiled. “Yes, he was a wonderful man.” Then hesitating, she tilted her head and asked, “Did you know that the Uncle Lewis and Reggie found Jane and I abandoned on their way home from your mother’s funeral? It seems that we both lost our one good parent around the same time. I hope the positive legacies of my father and your mother will provide a strong foundation for both of us to grow into the people we aspire to be.”
Though Mr. Darcy remained silent, a subtle nod and a small smile played on his lips, leading Elizabeth to believe he agreed with her sentiment. They continued their walk with her hand nestled in the crook of his arm, choosing the path that veered to the left that promised a more leisurely, scenic return to Rosings. It was a special treat for Elizabeth to be able to walk so far without a specific task that she was after. Though not as confined as she once had been, her many responsibilities limited her time to simply enjoy nature.
Despite her initial apprehension about Mr. Darcy’s visit, his presence, and Richard’s too, turned out to be a blessing. They had had helped keep Lady Catherine in line the night before and were willing to go along with Anne’s plan, albeit reluctantly. As a final touch, Mr. Darcy had sought her out for a walk. As their conversation continued, it became clear that it was both insightful and deeply enjoyable, a blend of wit and wisdom that she quite enjoyed.
So much of her life recently had been somber with Uncle Lewis’s illness and eventual passing and the moving to be exactly what she needed. Elizabeth appreciated the fact that Mr. Darcy was willing to let her mind wander and simply absorb the tranquility that nature offered. Wanting to express her gratitude, Elizabeth broke their silence. “It has meant a lot that you have come to Anne and me at this time. I know that you and Georgianna have only recently dealt with your own loss. Please know that your support has meant the world to me at a time when I had grown weary of doing it all on my own.”
Halting their forward movement, Mr. Darcy took both of Elizabeth’s hands in his own larger ones and said, “I well understand the requirements of taking an estate in hand while at the same time dealing with the weight of grief. Though somehow, I think you grieve Uncle Lewis more deeply than I grieved my father. I am glad that you have found some solace in my presence.”
With a slight shake of her head, Elizabeth raised one eyebrow, it seemed to her that Mr. Darcy often was self-deprecating, and it would not do. He was too good a man to belittle himself so often. His inability to recognize his own good qualities might explain his cynical view of others. Elizabeth could tell he was fighting the habit that she saw during his last visit, but it was always nice to have a reminder of one’s own worth. So she explained, “Grief is not something to compare or measure it is simply felt. Do not belittle your experience, Mr. Darcy.”
Eyes widening, Mr. Darcy hesitated before smiling widely. “Before I forget, I wanted to say that the condolence you offered last night was, in fact, the sincerest of all that had been offered to me in regard to my father’s death. Shall we continue?”
“Yes, as much as I am enjoying this walk, I do have responsibilities to get to.” As they walked the rest of the way back to the mansion, they spoke of the responsibilities that Elizabeth oversaw at Rosings. It was a relief for Elizabeth to share her common burdens with someone who knew exactly what she was going through.
Soon enough though, Rosings was within sight and they had to part, at least for the moment and Mr. Darcy said, “Since you promised to write Georgianna, don’t hesitate to share any questions or concerns about the estate, staff problems, or difficult neighbors. I may not have all the answers, but I will do my best to assist you and Anne.”