Page 15 of Queen Crow
“If you scratch them, I will end you. Chanel doesn't make them anymore, why couldn’t you take my Diors?” I murmur, and he huffs at me, flicking the cigarette on the ground and stomping on it.
Lips shoots him a look and it’s impressive to watch him blanch and pick it up without even seeing the death in her eyes.
“You have more money than God, according to Lips; you can get a new pair made. These ones suited me best, my blood is too rich for the cheaper ones.”
Lips groans quietly and rolls her eyes, squeezing my hand. “He asked me for an allowance last night, as if I’m his goddamn mother. I told him to earn it but his ideas for that make me want to murder something, so that’s not going to happen.”
The priest turns back in our direction and I seal my lips shut again. I’m not religious, but I do try to be respectful of these sorts of ceremonies, especially when they mean so much to people I love.
Aodhan planned this entire service out for his cousins, and Harley also cares deeply about giving Jack the burial he deserves. They’ve argued for days about the expenses, and I’m not entirely sure who won, but they’re standing together now, shoulder to shoulder, and it’s good to see them supporting one another.
The moment the priest ushers Aodhan forward to throw more dirt onto the coffin, I have to pat my eyes dry. Ash shoots me a look but I wave him off. This isn’t about me, I don’t want his overprotective dramatics to make a scene right now.
As Harley steps up to take his turn, Lips leans into my side, supporting me as she murmurs into my ear, “They’ve done a good job. They’ve given him a much better burial than most get down here. He’s with his girl again.”
I nod and try to clear my throat as we watch each of the O’Cronin family say their final goodbye to Jack. “I should’ve done something. I should’ve spoken up or dragged him out. I’ll never forgive myself, I don’t care what the guys say.”
“This is all about guilt?” Noah scoffs, and Lips pulls away from me to pinch his wrist between two fingers. It looks like nothing, like she’s gently grabbing him to stop him from tearing me down, but I see the wince and that wide-eyed terror he has with her sometimes when he oversteps the mark.
She’s a flick of her hand away from breaking his wrist.
“This is about loyalty. This is about Jack doing everything for his family and making the ultimate sacrifice. If you learn nothing else from me, Noah, learn this; I would do anything to keep my family safe. You need to decide if you’re a part of this family or not, and then get your shit together. If you’re in, it’s all in.”
She lets go of his wrist and he clutches it to his chest, glancing around like he’s worried everyone is watching him being disciplined by his sister and laughing at his expense. He doesn’t know us at all.
Because despite everything we’ve hissed at him or snapped at him whenever he’s run that mouth of his, we’re all also very aware of who and what he is. There’s no way that any of us would joke around in that way with this very obviously broken child. God, there’s only two years difference between us but also a thousand years of life. Sure, he’s had to fake a death for some reason, but his trauma couldn’t ever touch his sister’s.
Two years ago, Lips was killing crime lords and being stalked by the Jackal, Senior, and the Devil himself. She was being tested over and over again, and every time she came out of those trials stronger.
I can’t imagine this brat surviving anything.
The moment the music starts up again, Aodhan turns to come over and collect me, his eyes still rimmed in red even as his face is stern and gruff looking.
Men always have trouble with emotions, but there’s no shame in grieving your blood, your best friend, the man who would have happily given his life for you and yours. Jack was all of those things.
He was also desperate to be with his girl again.
“We’re heading back to the compound for the wake now,” he says needlessly, because I’m already on top of the entire plan for the day, but it’s easier to talk details right now than the hard stuff.
Lips squeezes my hand one last time and then jerks her head at Noah. “We’ll meet you over there.”
She hesitates for a second, always touch-shy, but then she leans forward to give Aodhan a squeeze. “You did him proud, all of you.”
Aodhan gives her back a single pat and nods his head, swallowing roughly without a word, but if anyone in the world understands this sort of thing, it’s Lips Anderson.
We all walk together to the cars, Ash coming to my side as a show of support. Aodhan helps me into the Impala, waiting until I’m buckled in before he shuts the door behind me. There’s a small moment between him and Ash, just the tiniest passing of respect between them that I would’ve missed if I’d blinked, and then Aodhan is sliding behind the wheel and getting us on the road back to the compound.
I love my brother.
No matter how he reacts to things, no matter how much he hates the idea of me belonging to a man who might hurt or disrespect me, he has only ever loved me and protected me. He’s lived and breathed for me even in the darkest days we’ve faced together.
I start to weep again because Aodhan has lost that, over and over again. His sister, his cousin, his best friend. Everyone has been ripped away from him.
We pull up outside his house and I wait dutifully for him to open the car door for me. He pulls me into his arms the moment I stand up.
“No more crying, Queenie. That part is over with,” he says, and I pat my eyes with a silk handkerchief. He huffs at the sight of it and I smile, even through my tears.
“No more death. I can’t handle any more of it,” I croak, and he nods, pulling me into his arms even as the wake begins to get loud around us. There’s people everywhere, bodies coming and going from the houses regardless of who they belong to.