Page 18 of Public Image, Private Heart (K-Drama Love Story #1)
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Yumi
T he days following the funeral were anything but easy. The vibrant Ji-yong I knew had been replaced by a somber shadow. Watching him navigate the public’s expectations while grappling with his grief was a painful spectacle.
The most excruciating ordeal was witnessing his public facade.
Just days after his grandmother’s passing, we had to attend the drama awards ceremony.
It felt so insignificant now, considering the context.
Nevertheless, our drama won two awards—Best Screenplay and Best Original Soundtrack—and Ji-yong even snagged the Most Popular Actor award.
But behind the dazzling smile and gracious acceptance speech, I could see the pain etched on his face when he thanked his friends and family.
Not being able to offer him solace in that moment, especially while we were hidden away, felt like a cruel irony.
The familiar ache of loss made me deeply aware of his pain.
I attended the funeral as a friend, accompanied by some of the Princess of Cosmos crew.
During those lonely nights, I offered my support, sharing in his grief.
As if the emotional turmoil weren’t enough, an off-screen drama also seemed to unfold during the awards ceremony.
Jun-ho, a fellow supporting actor from both Princess of Cosmos and Hometown Whispers , who was seated at the same table as us, shot a casual remark to Ji-yong: “Hyung, thanks again for that night,” his voice barely above a whisper.
“And I saw you go home with... M.H. Did you get lucky?” His eyebrows danced with playful mischief as he exchanged a clandestine glance with Ji-yong.
Ji-yong froze for a few seconds before glancing at me, then shot Jun-ho a warning look, but the damage was done.
My stomach lurched. M.H.? Could it be Min-hee?
A wave of doubt washed over me as I contemplated the possibility of a hidden chapter in Ji-yong’s life.
The fragile foundation of our unspoken understanding was suddenly threatened.
Unable to broach the subject given our ambiguous relationship, I retreated into silence.
After the awards ceremony, I texted Ji-yong to let him know I intended to stay at my place that night. His subsequent call, denying that anything ever happened between him and Min-hee, only deepened my uncertainty.
I thought I knew Ji-yong well enough by now.
We’d shared countless moments, filled with both laughter and tears.
But now, a troubling thought crossed my mind: was he always just a playboy, never intending to settle down?
With his looks, his physique, and his status as Most Popular Actor—confirmed by the award—why would he ever commit to a serious relationship?
For the first time, this petty thought troubled me.
Given what he was going through with his grandmother, I decided to set my concerns aside for now.
Besides, my workload was already overwhelming, and something else had happened on set with Ryan.
During one of our kissing scenes, he intentionally deepened the kiss, forcing his tongue in, even though it wasn’t necessary.
I gasped in surprise, and he mistook it for a gasp of pleasure, shooting me another creepy look.
Being an introverted woman in South Korea and a newcomer actress left me in a vulnerable position. I retreated to my makeup trailer, my body slightly trembling from the unwelcome kiss.
The contrast between how Ji-yong treated me during our intimate scenes and the way Ryan Kim was treating me now was stark—like night and day.
I knew Ryan had mistreated me, yet I couldn’t shake the feeling of confusion and guilt, as if I had somehow betrayed Ji-yong, even though I hadn’t returned Ryan’s kiss—not even for the camera.
I tried to shake the feeling and console myself before returning to the set, determined to ignore him as much as possible and not show him the power he had over me.
As the situation at work worsened, so did my personal life. Unconsciously, I started creating distance between Ji-yong and me by spending more nights at my place.
But the solitude did little to soothe my troubled mind. Sleep became elusive, replaced by a relentless replay of the past few days. The tangled web of events involving Ji-yong, Min-hee, and Ryan left me disoriented and exhausted.
The constant mental turmoil took its toll. Each morning, I forced myself to appear composed and professional on set. But behind the facade, I was crumbling.
Then it happened.
On a seemingly ordinary Tuesday, after a tense and prolonged surgical scene, I retreated to my trailer for a moment of peace. Checking the clock on my phone, I saw it was almost 9 PM at night with no sight of finishing the scene today.
As I sighed and tried to cool down, the door creaked open. Expecting Da-eun, I prepared a friendly greeting. Instead, Ryan appeared, his demeanor off, a faint scent of alcohol clinging to him. He swiftly closed the door.
I suddenly recalled that night when Ji-yong had casually entered my trailer during a break to share a game. Our relationship then was friendly and comfortable. But with Ryan, it felt entirely different—unsafe and unsettling.
Trapped in this small space with Ryan, a chilling sense of dread washed over me. “Ryan...” I tried to greet him, but my voice came out as a mere whisper. My heart pounded in my chest, fear and confusion warred within me as his predatory gaze locked onto mine.
Before I could say anything else, he stumbled toward me. The smell of alcohol grew stronger, and I could feel my breath quickening. Panic began to creep in as he closed the distance. I backed away, desperately searching for an escape route, but the confined space of the trailer offered no refuge.
“Yumi...” he slurred, his voice unsteady. “Let’s finish what we started last time, huh?” His hand reached out, grabbing my hips, and I flinched instinctively. My mind raced, desperately searching for a way out.
Surely, he wouldn’t dare, I thought, with countless crew members just outside. “Ryan, stop! What are you doing?” Desperation tinged my voice, but he continued his advance, pressing his face closer to mine.
“Oh, come on, goody-goody,” he said, a hint of arrogance in his voice. “I just want to have some fun. You know you want it too.”
“No, get off me!” My voice, sharp and panicked, startled him. I edged closer to the door, creating some distance between us.
With an irritated “tsk,” he stumbled out of my trailer. My body trembled as I tried to process what had just happened. The thought of facing him again, pretending everything was normal, was almost unbearable.