Page 22 of Promises & Petals in Nettleford-on-the-Wold (Escape to… Nettleford-on-the-Wold #1)

A s she neared the top, she glanced beneath her, immediately regretting her decision as her eyes blurred at the shock of how high she was.

Turning back, she squeezed her eyes tight shut and gripped on tighter to the rung in front of her, her knuckles turning white as her ears filled with the noise of her heart hammering.

‘You’ve got this, Hannah. Just a few more rungs.’

At the sound of Josh’s voice, she opened her eyes again and tilted her head back to look above her.

Sure enough, Josh was there, holding his hand out towards her.

Reaching out, she waited until he’d taken her hand and gripped it tightly.

As soon as she felt his grip, her heart rate slowed, and she felt more confident.

Climbing the last couple of rungs, she paused when her head peeped above the platform, and she saw what he’d set out for her.

More fairy lights had been wrapped around the poles of the scaffolding, twinkling away and illuminating the platform on which he’d set a flask, two mugs, a blanket, a book and a telescope.

‘Good evening.’ Josh grinned at her as he helped her onto the platform.

‘Evening.’ Sitting down, she sidled across to him and crossed her legs, her hand still enveloped in his.

‘I’ve missed seeing you around the cottage today. Did you have a lot of work on?’ Reaching out, he gently tucked her hair behind her ear before cupping her cheek gently in his palm.

‘I’ve just been busy. I missed you too.’ She omitted that she’d been busy staring blindly at one email whilst battling with her heart and her head. She looked into his eyes as he leaned forward, their lips millimetres apart before she spoke again. ‘I really have missed seeing you about today.’

‘So have I.’

Reaching around his neck with her free hand, Hannah placed her palm against the back of his head and pulled him towards her, the few millimetres between them closing as their lips touched. How could something so wrong, something that had the power to hurt so many people, feel so good? So right?

Leaning back, he kissed her lightly on the forehead before looking away. ‘Take a look at the view.’

Shifting on the platform, she turned to face where he was indicating before she gasped. Because the cottage was located at the edge of the village, there was limited light pollution, and they were surrounded by a limitless blanket of darkening sky, stars twinkling above. ‘It’s beautiful.’

‘It’s gorgeous up here during the day too. You can see right across to Nettleford from here.’ Wrapping an arm around her, he pointed ahead of them.

She picked up the book, grinned as she read the title and then turned it so the cover was facing him. ‘The Beginner’s Guide to Stargazing?’

‘Yes.’ He chuckled. ‘I don’t know the first thing about stars and constellations, so I thought it might be pretty neat for us to learn together. Even if we just locate one named star a week or something.’

‘One a week?’ She frowned as she flicked through the pages, not that she could make out the text or the diagrams in just the glow from the fairy lights, but more so that she could roll the words, ‘one a week’ over in her mind and try to process what he was saying.

How many stars were visible from Earth? A hundred?

Five hundred? A thousand? She didn’t have a clue, but it definitely sounded as though Josh was hoping they would be together for the long haul.

Did she? She did. Without hesitation, but could she? Now, that was the question.

‘Are you okay? You look kind of sad?’ Josh ran his fingers down her cheek.

Keeping her eyes focused on the book in her hands, the book she couldn’t actually read because of the lack of light, she shrugged.

‘I want to be. You know how long I’ve liked you like this, how long.

...’ She shook her head. He knew. ‘But what with everything Sophie’s going through at the moment, I just don’t know if it’s the right thing to do. ’

‘You know how I feel and what I want.’

‘I know.’ Looking up from the book, she caught his gaze and smiled sadly. ‘And if you were anyone else, I’d be jumping for joy.’

‘If I were anyone else?’ He rubbed at his jawline, thinking.

‘Yes, no. I mean if you were you, but you weren’t Sophie’s brother.’ She wasn’t explaining herself very well. ‘I’m just worried that the two of us getting together will ruin my friendship with her in some way. Especially if we were to break up.’

‘I see.’ Josh nodded slowly. ‘I understand that. In fact, I’ve got to admit that was the reason I didn’t ask you for coffee as soon as I clapped eyes on you when you got back into town.’

Reaching out, she took his hand in hers, lacing her fingers around his. ‘What changed?’

‘I realised Sophie loves me and she loves you too. She’d hate for us to be even contemplating not seeing each other because of her.’

Hannah nodded. He was right. Lucy had literally said the same thing too, so why could she still hear Sophie and her parents warning about the repercussions when friendships and relationships mixed? ‘I know.’

‘So?’ Josh raised an eyebrow.

‘So, I don’t know. I don’t like all this sneaking about. I feel as though I’m lying to her.’

‘We’ll tell her. Tomorrow we’ll tell her.’

Hannah chewed on her bottom lip. Were they being selfish by launching this on her plate just after her own relationship had broken down? Possibly, but it would be worse if she found out from someone else. She nodded.

‘Shall we do some stargazing then? I’ll turn off the fairy lights so we can see them better.’ Grinning, Josh shifted position so he was almost lying down on the platform with his head leaning on the thatch.

Looking at Josh lying there with his arm outstretched waiting for her to join him, she felt a rush of warmth forming in her chest. She nodded.

She’d enjoy tonight and face the consequences of their actions tomorrow.

Moving so she was sitting next to him, she then wriggled down until she was resting the nape of her neck on his arm.

Opening the book, she squinted and laughed. ‘I can’t read a thing now.’

‘Oh, hang on, I have my phone somewhere.’ Shifting to his side, Josh pulled his mobile from the back pocket of his jeans before turning the torch app on and shining it towards the book.

‘Thanks. Okay, let’s take a look.’ Flicking through the book, Hannah scrunched up her nose. ‘Where do we even begin? Shall we try to find a constellation or a named star?’ She twisted her head to look at him and laughed as he kissed her on the tip of her nose.

‘Let’s start big and see if can find a constellation or one of the star patterns.’

‘Right, so which one? There’re loads.Cassiopeia, Cepheus, Draco, Ursa Major and Ursa Minor. Any of those take your fancy?’

‘How about the last one?’

‘Ursa Minor? Umm., okay. I’m not even sure I’m saying that right.

’ Hannah grinned. ‘Ooh, another name for it is the Little Bear! I’m sure I’ve heard of that before!

’ Twisting again, she held the book up between them both so they could both see the diagram of the Little Bear in the book and the night sky above them.

‘Ah, I think we need to find The Plough first and then we can find the Little Bear from there.’ Josh pointed to the page.

‘You’re right. Let’s find The Plough tonight and save the Little Bear for another time.’ Hannah smiled. She suddenly needed to believe Josh was right and that they could stay the course and search for a new star or constellation each week.

As they searched the night sky for the stars which formed The Plough, Hannah smiled as Josh took her hand in his, lifted it towards the sky and used her forefinger to trace along seven stars, drawing an imaginary dot-to-dot.

‘There, those seven bright stars must be the bowl of The Plough. And if we look up here,’ he continued to etch a line through the dark sky, ‘that must be the handle.’

‘We found it.’ Hannah grinned.

‘Yes, we did. We’ll be expert stargazers soon enough.’ Josh chuckled.

‘Haha, we could both retrain as professors for Cambridge or Oxford.’

‘Or go the whole hog and relocate to America and teach the students of Harvard.’ Lying the book, on his stomach, he leaned up slightly and flicked the switch for the fairy lights, which flickered to life forming a comforting glow over the platform.

After which, he pulled her towards him into the crook of his arm and kissed her on the side of her head.

Lifting their clasped hands towards the stars, Hannah turned them over, the illumination from the fairy lights enough to see the calluses and scars on his skin. ‘Why did you really move back to Nettleford-on-the-Wold?’

‘For you.’ He kissed her on the side of her head again.

‘What you told me at your grandad’s funeral, about how you felt about me, it made me realise that I didn’t want what I had.

It made me realise that what I wanted was the love that makes your heart flip or skip a beat when you see your partner.

And that I didn’t have that type of love with the ex who had already left me hanging whilst she decided whether to end it or not. ’

‘But all I was to you was your little sister’s mate.’ She ran the pad of her forefinger across the edge of his ragged nails.

‘Yes, and no. When I arrived back in the village after being away in London all that time, I really saw you.’ Bringing his hand down, hers too, he ran the back of his across his face before letting Hannah lift them again.

‘I can’t explain it. I saw you for Hannah rather than Sophie’s friend, and I felt that spark, that connection. I wanted to explore it.’

Hannah frowned. ‘So, you’re telling me you waited four whole years to explore something with me not knowing if we’d ever end up in a proper relationship?’

Josh let out a soft chuckle. ‘In my defence, I didn’t know you weren’t going to come back for four years. Every time I asked Sophie, she’d tell me she was hoping you’d come back soon. And I took soon as being next week, next month at the most.’

Hannah smiled. Sophie had never begged her to come back, but by the sounds of it, she’d wanted Hannah to. That was Sophie’s way; she’d never ask anything of anyone. ‘Plus, I’m guessing you were preoccupied with setting up our business and everything.’

‘Yep, retraining, the business, moving out of my parents’.’ She felt Josh nod beside her. ‘I’ve certainly rammed a lot into the four years. As have you.’

‘And you don’t regret it? Moving from the hustle and bustle and excitement of London to sleepy old Nettleford-on-the-Wold?’ Hannah lowered their hands to her lips and kissed his.

‘Not one bit. I love it here. This is my home.’ Rolling onto his side, he looked at her. ‘And it’s only got better since you’ve returned.’

‘I’m glad I came back.’ Shafting to face him too, Hannah felt him pull his hand gently from her grasp before he traced his finger down the side of her face.

‘We’ll tell Sophie tomorrow. After Florrie’s birthday party.’ Josh’s tone was confident. ‘And then we can spend every spare minute of every day together. Make up for the missed time.’

‘Okay.’ Leaning forward, she kissed him, hoping some of his confidence would rub off onto her.

After she turned back to face the sky as he leaned his chin on the top of her head.

Closing her eyes, she wished this night would never end.

He made her feel everything she ever wished, safe, wanted and giddy with excitement about their shared future.