Page 14 of Princess Josie (Littleworld)

Chapter Eleven

Josie

I haven’t stopped smiling since my Daddy made love to me. I’m floating through the entire bath and as he dries me off with the new special towels he purchased. When he pats my sore bottom to encourage me to head toward the bed, I giggle and skip that direction.

I wait for him to turn out all the lights. Any modesty I had before tonight has mostly fled. I stand naked next to Daddy’s bed and wait for him. He returns with my doll Emma in his hands, lifts me onto the mattress, and climbs in next to me.

It’s weird having him with me, but I like it. He pulls the covers over us, hauls my back against his chest, and holds me. His lips come to my ear. “Are you comfortable, Baby girl?”

“Yes, Daddy.” I hug Emma against my naked chest. I’ve slept naked for years, but not with a man. A naked man. My naked man.

“You’ll let me know if you don’t like me touching you.”

I wiggle into him closer, aware of his erection against my butt. “I like it when you touch me. I want you to hold me.”

“I want to hold you too, Baby girl, but if you change your mind, you need to tell Daddy.”

“Okay.” His attentiveness and thoughtfulness are off the charts, and I fall asleep with a smile on my face and warmth in my heart.

It seems like only moments pass before I open my eyes to find the sun up. My Daddy is still holding me close. His lips are on my neck, tickling me as he nibbles around my ear.

I smile, and I don’t stop smiling as he dresses me, feeds me breakfast, and takes me to play in my new nursery. I spend all morning exploring my new toys, coloring, and playing with my dolls.

Daddy is preoccupied. He regularly checks on me, but he’s on his phone a lot and runs his hand through his hair often. Finally, he comes into my nursery, sits on the rocking chair, and reaches for me. “Come here, princess.”

I leave my dolls on the floor and head toward him, so excited when he lifts me off the floor and settles me on his lap sideways. He rubs my back and meets my gaze. His brow is furrowed.

“I hate to do this, princess, but Daddy has to go to work for a while. There’s a problem with one of my cases, and I need to go handle it.”

“Oh.” My heart sinks. Bad thoughts run through my head. Maybe he’s making that up because he’s tired of me. I’m a handful. Heck, my adult is a handful by herself. When my Little is added to the mix, I’m a lot of work.

I swallow and nod.

“I’m so sorry, Baby girl. I know we were supposed to spend the entire weekend together, and I hate this. I don’t know how long it will take me, but as soon as I fix this problem, I will be all yours again.”

“Okay,” I whisper.

“Do you want to stay here in Daddy’s house? I’d love for you to. But if you’d rather go to your own apartment while I work, I can drop you off there first.”

I think about it. I don’t want to be here alone in Daddy’s house without him.

I’m scared I’d panic. I do better in my own environment.

I’m pretty sure I could slay a red, fire-breathing dragon wearing a zipped-up hoody with flashing lights and chomping on potato chips if Daddy was with me.

But I don’t want to wander around his house alone.

“Can you drop me off, please?”

He holds me tight. “Yes, Baby girl. And again, I’m so sorry. Sometimes Daddy’s job requires me to go into work unexpectedly. I hate that it happened on your first weekend here.”

Will there be more weekends here? I know he’s saying all the right things, but my brain isn’t wired to trust people as well as other people do. I keep worrying he’s tired of me.

He keeps a close eye on me as he puts my shoes and socks on and then my coat. He grabs my purse from the counter and hands it to me, squatting down in front of me. “We can leave your suitcase here if you want.”

I shrug. “Whatever.”

He holds my gaze, taking a deep breath.

I stare at him. I’m not mad. I keep telling myself I’m not mad. And I’m not. I’m scared.

He hauls me into his arms and kisses my forehead, letting his lips linger before releasing me.

I stay very little on the way to my apartment and offer him a forced smile after he helps me inside.

He tips my head back, kisses me, and says, “I’ll text you when I know what time I’ll be done, and I’ll come back and pick you up.”

I nod. “Okay.”

He flinches, and I know it’s because I didn’t call him Daddy.

After he leaves, I stand in my spot for a long time, staring at the door, my heart beating fast. Finally, I turn and run to my room.

I kick off my shoes and crawl under the covers.

I don’t even care that I’m dressed. I just want to fall asleep and escape before I have a panic attack.

I’m crying uncontrollably when I call my mom later that night. It’s after ten, but she picks up instantly. She always does. She keeps her phone close by at all times, always worried I might need her. I try not to be needy with my parents, but I need her more than ever tonight.

“Honey, calm down. Take a breath. What happened?”

“He didn’t come back,” I tell her between hiccupped sobs. “He said he would text and then come back. He said he would always be here when he got off work. He said he would always let me know if he was running late. He didn’t.”

“Deep breaths, honey. Tell me exactly what happened.”

I fill her in on all the details I know, including the fact that I went to his house last night for the weekend, but leaving out the part about having sex with him. When I’m done, she sighs.

“Honey, he’s a detective. He probably got busy. He might be in a dangerous situation tonight that’s preventing him from texting or calling.”

I’m surprised she’s on his side. I thought she would be more skeptical.

She only met him the one time a week ago.

She knows he’s been over every night this past week, but she hasn’t spoken to him again.

We were supposed to go to my parents’ house tomorrow evening for dinner.

Now I feel like I’m never going to see him again.

It’s irrational and frustrating. My brain mostly knows that, but I can’t stop myself from feeling like he has gotten tired of me. “I’m a lot of work, Mom. Maybe he decided he doesn’t want to deal with me.”

“Honey, from what you’ve told me, you’ve hardly had any sensitivity issues when you’re with him. Plus, he’s a Daddy, so he isn’t likely to tire of your Little side, Josie.”

“But, Mom, I’m really Little, like all the time. Maybe it’s too much for him. Maybe he wants someone who can be an adult more often and leave the house. Mom! I can’t even leave the apartment.”

“Honey, you left your apartment yesterday. You went to his house.”

“That’s not the same. I can’t go to the movies or to a restaurant or a party.” I cringe at the thought of any of those things.

She calmly responds. “I bet you could do any of those things if he was with you.”

I draw in a breath and keep pacing my apartment.

I’ve been pacing for hours. She’s probably right.

The image of the red, fire-breathing dragon comes to mind.

I could even do that. I bet if my Daddy held my hand, I could even go to the theater, as long as it didn’t have red seats and we didn’t get red vines.

Popcorn sometimes makes me nervous, but it’s not as loud as chips.

“Josie, you’re letting your imagination get away from you, honey. He has only been gone ten hours. He’s at work. Or maybe he got off recently, and now he’s at home because he thought you would already be in bed asleep and he didn’t want to wake you because he assumed you would be asleep.”

I keep sniffling.

“Honey, I think you should do exactly that. Get in bed. I bet he’ll call you first thing in the morning.”

“I don’t want him to call me in the morning, Mom. I want him to call me now,” I whine.

“Well, you’re going to need to dig into your adult side and think more rationally.

I know you love this man, Josie. It’s obvious.

And I bet he loves you too. You’re going to have to find a way to trust him.

When he can’t call you, it doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you. It means he’s tied up with work.”

I nod even though she can’t see me. Rationally, I know she’s right. But I’m sad and scared. My Little is very nervous. My adult is in a panic.

Suddenly, there’s a knock at the door, and I gasp. I rush over and look through the peephole. “Mom, he’s here,” I whisper before I hang up and set the phone down.

I throw the door open, swiping at the tears on my face. I’m a mess. My pigtails have almost fallen completely out. My dress is wrinkly from napping in it and balling the front up in my fists.

“Princess…” He comes into my apartment, shuts the door, and pulls me into his arms. “I’m so sorry.”

I start crying again. I can’t stop it. I want to be stronger than I feel, but I’m not.

“Baby girl…” he picks me up and carries me to the armchair where he sits with me in his lap. He cups my face. His brow is furrowed. “Have you been crying all day?”

I swallow, not wanting to admit such a thing, but he can tell. My face is puffy and red. I’ve cried so many times there are tear tracks on my cheeks. And my hair. Jeez.

“I scared you, didn’t I, princess?” He rubs my back.

I nod.

He holds me, rocking me, rubbing my back, kissing my neck until I start to breathe regularly.

“Are you mad at me, Daddy?” I finally call him Daddy.

“No, Baby girl.” He brushes my hair back. “Not at all.”

“I’m so needy.”

“I love you, Josie. Just exactly the way you are. We’ve only been together for a week.

It’s understandable that you would panic when I abruptly dump you back at your apartment and take off for ten hours without a word.

And I’m so very sorry that happened. I thought about you all day, but I had an intense situation to deal with, and there was no chance for me to call.

By the time I was able to leave, all I wanted to do was run for my truck and get here as fast as possible. ”

Tears track down my cheeks again. “I’m a terrible girlfriend.”