Page 30 of Priceless (Return to Culloden Moor #7)

CHAPTER THIRTY

J acob heard the scream all the way at the opposite end of the house, out in the hoogah. No matter what he did, he felt he couldn’t move fast enough. Was he dreaming?

Jess popped out of her room into the hallway, and he jumped to the side to avoid her, slamming his shoulder into the wall and proving he was wide awake.

He took the stairs two at a time. Laira’s voice led him to the blue room.

He turned the knob and flung open the door.

She was sitting up, eyes closed, still screaming like she was falling off a building.

He took her shoulders and gave her a gentle shake. “Laira, wake up. Wake up, love. It’s just a dream. Just a dream.”

She blinked, tried to jump away from him, like he was the threat.

“It’s me, love. It’s Jacob. Ye’re safe. We’re at Jess’s house, remember?”

She stopped resisting, shook her head, and her eyes finally focused. Her arms came around his neck and she pulled herself against him for only a few seconds before twisting away, lifting her hands to her head and burying her face in the bedding. He couldn’t tell if she was greetin’ or groanin’.

“Lass? Come on, now. Tell me. Was it the whales?”

She nodded and growled in frustration, then lifted her face just high enough to be heard. “Run away, Jacob. You should get far away from me. I’m a mess.”

He laughed and pulled on her, refusing to relent until he had her back in his arms. “Ye’re no mess. Ye’ve had a fright is all. Terror is no small thing. Ye need to give yerself time.”

She shook her head, but at least she clung to his shirt with both hands, which literally made his heart swell. “It’s not just that. I’m a monster. I’m going to leave you. I’m going to walk away and go home, no matter what. No matter how it breaks my heart, I have to go back.”

“Ah. I see.” He petted her hair. “Ye believe ye can save me some pain if ye push me away now, aye?”

She nodded against his chest. “I know it’s too late, I know we feel the same about each other. But we should start…mitigating damages.” She pulled back to see his face. “We’d be stupid not to.”

“Well then, I’m sorry.”

Her face fell, but she kept still, waiting for him to agree to ending it.

“I’m verra sorry for the pain. Sorry to add to the misery ye suffered before ye came.”

Tears leaked from her eyes and down her cheeks. “No one will convince me it wasn’t worth it.”

He cupped her face and wiped the tears with his thumbs. “Then ye won’t curse me for addin’ more?”

She finally understood that he wasn’t going to walk away, and she shook her head, ready to argue.

“Wheesht.” He laid a finger across her lips. “The foolish thing would be to waste the time we have. If ye must go back, I will not stand in yer way. But once ye’re there, would ye not regret the time we could have savored together and didn’t?”

Her heavy sigh was a surrender in itself. “What I will regret is leaving you, but I don’t have a choice.”

“Then I will try not to make it harder than it has to be.”

“She’s going to shower and join us downstairs,” Jacob told his friends waiting in the hall. “She thanks ye for the clean things.” He smirked. “And says she never intends to sleep again.”

“Poor lass,” Banner said. “We should do something special to keep her mind off the sea.”

Jess’s eyes lit. “Let’s have a bonfire. Call some of the 79 over to have a real ceilidh .”

Her husband nodded. “Done.”

“Wait.” Jacob lowered his voice. “I have decided not to tell her about Jocko until the end. Maybe it will make it easier for her to say goodbye.”

Jess squeezed his arm. “We won’t say a word. But ye’d better pray she doesn’t figure it out on her own. It’s a miracle she hasn’t already.”

He grimaced. “I’ll pray Jocko doesnae do anything daft.”

I wore my fingers out typing a slightly detailed message for Jocko before getting in the shower.

I wouldn’t have bothered, but I was back to needing advice again.

I had plenty of items left on my itinerary and little interest in checking them off.

But I decided not to be too hasty. Considering the gauntlet my emotions had been through, I was in no condition to think rationally.

After laying out what had happened since I’d messaged last, I asked…

How can I simultaneously go home at the end of the trip and not cause Jacob a lot of heartache?

Let me list yer options.

#1. Make him dislike ye.

#2. Sneak away without telling him

#3. Pretend to fall for someone else.

#4. Pick yer nose and eat the result.

The last was only a jest, of course. Hearts, obviously, are not my forte.

Thanks a lot. That was no help at all.

My apologies. Perhaps what ye ask cannot be done.

But I have to go back.

He took his time answering.

Is it plausible to take him with ye?

I would do it in a heartbeat, but it’s just as impossible as me staying in Scotland. He has a staff and hundreds of friends who adore him, not to mention his generations-old bar. An entire city that loves him, including some sexy widow who will be more than happy to help him erase all memory of me.

Pity. Ye say it is impossible to stay?

It is. I don’t have much of a life back home, but it is my life.

And if I replace it with a new one, if I just walk away from everything, it will be saying that my life, up until now, was meaningless.

That the life I built with Paul and Peaches was just a way of killing time, waiting for something better.

Peaches is still here, building her own happy life. But Paul? It would be like erasing him.

I’m still holding his keys and wallet. It’s still my job.

And if Paul were here, what would he want for ye?

A clean house. A good car. And money in the bank. He didn’t have a will, didn’t like speculating about the future, but he made sure I always had that.

I also have to go back to handle the business.

I remember. A laundering business. Ye manage it?

No. But without a will, it came to me. Now his cousin wants to buy me out. He had a little piece, has been running it since Paul retired. Now he wants to own it outright. And all that will take a minute.

Let me know if ye’d like a list of single males in Denver, Colorado with fine Scottish surnames.

No. There will never be anyone else.

Then perhaps ye will want a dog. It worked for John Wick. Ye could name it Jacob.

Very funny. Even the dog didn’t work out well for John Wick.

I chose a poor example.

Would you like a list of ways to mitigate yer own heartbreak once ye’re home?

Give it up, Jocko. No one can save me.