Page 9

T he opening theme of Evangelion echoed through Xavier's room, familiar as a lullaby. I settled against his chest, the warmth of him steadying my still-raw nerves as I balanced my laptop. On his screen, lines of code scrolled past in endless green rivers while his arm lay heavy and possessive around my waist.

"Seriously? This again?" His voice held that mix of exasperation and fondness that always made my chest tight. "Dude, you've seen this like fifty times."

"Rich coming from the guy who made me sit through your two-hour TED talk on xenomorph reproduction yesterday." I tilted my head back, watching the code reflect in his eyes. Sometimes it felt like I could read his thoughts in those patterns, if I just looked hard enough. "Besides, you're not even watching. You're too busy doing your cyber stalker thing."

I expected a quick comeback, but instead, Xavier's gaze flicked from his screen to my face, lingering there with an intensity that made my skin warm. Something in his expression had softened, a momentary crack in his usually impenetrable armor.

"I can multitask." The words brushed against my ear as his hand slid to my throat, a casual possession that sent electricity through my veins. His fingers found my pulse, and I wondered if he could read my need in its rhythm. "I can hunt bad guys and keep an eye on you at the same time."

But for all his confidence, I caught the way his attention kept drifting from his work to the anime, to my face, back to his screen. Something was distracting him. Something he wasn't saying.

Unit 01 raged silently on screen, but the familiar comfort of anime couldn't ground me anymore. Not with Xavier's touch burning into my skin. Not after the promise he’d made earlier.

"You're thinking too loud again." Amusement colored his voice, dark and rich like smoke. "Tell me what's happening in that beautiful brain of yours."

I hit pause on the show, gathering every ounce of courage I possessed. My heart hammered in my chest as I turned in his arms, pressing my lips to his in a kiss that started tentatively but quickly grew bolder. My hands found his shoulders, gripping tightly as I pulled myself closer, practically crawling into his lap. Heat flooded my face at my own boldness, but I couldn't stop—didn't want to stop—as months of simmering tension finally boiled over.

When I finally pulled back, Xavier was looking at me with an expression I'd never seen before, something between surprise and hunger. I ducked my head, suddenly unable to meet his eyes, mortified by my own forwardness.

"Sorry," I mumbled, face burning. "I just…I've been thinking about…You know. What we talked about before." I couldn't even say the words out loud.

Xavier caught my chin, tilting my face up to meet his gaze. "Tell me what you want, Leo." His voice was low, commanding in a way that made my stomach flip. "I need to hear you say it."

"I want—" My voice caught, and then suddenly the words tumbled out in a rush. "I want to be inside you. I want you to show me how to top you, how to make you feel good. I want to please you, to use my body for your pleasure. I want...you." My face burned so hot I thought I might combust, but I couldn't look away from his eyes.

Xavier went perfectly still, that predator stillness that always sent shivers down my spine. For a terrible moment, I thought I'd said too much, been too forward. But then I saw something shift in his expression—surprise melting into hunger, calculation giving way to raw desire. His hand came up to cup my face, thumb brushing across my lower lip in a way that made my breath catch.

"Look at you," he murmured. "So honest about what you want. So eager to please." His eyes darkened, pupils dilating visibly. "You have no idea how rare that is, Leo. How refreshing."

The praise wrapped around me like a caress, making me lean into his touch instinctively.

"I like honesty," he continued, shifting our positions so I was sitting more fully in his lap. "Especially when it's as beautiful as yours." His fingers tangled in my hair, tugging just hard enough to send electricity racing down my spine. "And I want to reward it."

Xavier pulled me into a kiss that was anything but gentle, his teeth grazing my lower lip as his free hand slid beneath my borrowed shirt. I melted against him, overwhelmed by the intensity of his response, by the knowledge that my candor had pleased him this much.

"Yes," he breathed against my lips. "I'll teach you exactly how to please me. How to be inside me. How to make me feel good." Each promise punctuated with another kiss, another subtle shift of his hips against mine.

"I want to teach you how to touch me," Xavier said, his voice dropping to that commanding tone that made my dick twitch. "How to fuck me properly." He leaned back against the headboard, legs spread with casual confidence. "Get over here."

I moved toward him, heart hammering so hard I thought I might pass out. My skin felt too tight, too hot, like I might burst into flames at any moment. Xavier was still completely in charge, even sprawled half-naked on the bed. His eyes tracked my every movement, hungry and calculating.

"Give me your hand," he ordered.

I reached out, my fingers shaking. He took my wrist in a firm grip and guided my palm to the health bar tattoo over his heart. The ink was slightly raised against his skin, his heartbeat strong beneath my touch. My throat tightened as I realized I was finally— finally —touching him in a way I'd dreamed about for years.

"Feel that?" he asked, his pulse racing faster than his calm expression suggested. "That's what you do to me."

"Fuck," I whispered, overwhelmed that I could affect him like this. A wave of heat washed through me, settling low in my belly and making my cock strain painfully against my borrowed sweats.

His mouth curved into that dangerous smile. "Yeah. Fuck is right." He pulled me closer, his teeth grazing my neck in a sharp bite that made me gasp. The sudden pain bloomed into pleasure so intense I had to bite my lip to keep from moaning. "I'm gonna let you explore me, Leo. Learn how to make me feel good. But remember who's in charge here."

"You are," I responded automatically, earning another of those rare, genuine smiles that made my chest ache.

"Damn right." He guided my hand down his chest, over the ripple of muscle beneath the pale skin. I traced the tattoos I'd spent years admiring from afar—the WASD keys along his ribs, the triforce at his navel. Each one was a landmark on the map of his body, a map I was finally allowed to touch. My fingers trembled against his skin, half from nerves and half from the overwhelming need to touch him everywhere at once.

"Take these off," he commanded, nodding at his sweatpants.

My fingers fumbled with the waistband, nerves making me clumsy. A thin sheen of sweat broke out across my forehead as I tugged at the fabric. Xavier lifted his hips to help, the movement fluid and controlled. And then he was naked before me, and holy shit, I couldn't tear my eyes away.

His cock was bigger than I'd imagined, half-hard against his thigh with a slight curve that made my mouth water. The hair at the base was dark brown, the same color as the roots showing beneath his blue-dyed hair. Against his pale skin, it looked even darker, a stark contrast to my own light brown complexion as I reached toward him. I licked my lips unconsciously, a small whimper escaping before I could catch it. I'd seen plenty of dick pics in porn and group chats in the Army, but seeing one in person, especially Xavier's, was something entirely different. The sight of his circumcised head, pink and flushed, sent a surge of heat through me that left me lightheaded.

"You can stare later," Xavier said, amused. "Right now, I want you to touch me."

He wrapped my fingers around his cock, and the heat of him nearly burned my palm. The skin was impossibly soft over the hardening skin beneath, and I stroked experimentally, watching his face for any reaction. My own erection throbbed in sympathy, a wet spot forming where pre-cum had soaked through my sweats.

"Tighter," he instructed, squeezing my hand to demonstrate. "I like it rough. Don't be so fucking gentle."

I tightened my grip, stroking more firmly, and was rewarded with a catch in his breath. Coming from Xavier, that tiny reaction was like a scream of pleasure from anyone else. Pride welled up in my chest at being able to draw even that small response from him. My free hand drifted toward my own aching cock without conscious thought.

"Did I say you could touch yourself?" Xavier's voice cut through my haze of arousal.

I froze, face burning with embarrassment. "But I'm so horny," I whined, unable to keep the desperation from my voice. "I can barely stand it. Please, Xavier."

His expression hardened, that dangerous edge returning to his eyes. "Are you questioning my decision?"

I shrank back immediately. "No. Sorry."

He guided my hand back to his cock. "If you're a good boy, if you please me well, I'll let you come later, and it’ll feel so good, Leo. Even better because you’ll have been so good for me and waited. Because I’ll be so pleased with you.”

My brain flatlined before coming back online with: Yes. That. Want that. Make him happy. "Okay.”

"That's better," he said, his voice dropping lower. "Now touch my balls, too. Feel how they tighten when you stroke my cock."

I cupped them with my free hand, marveling at the weight, the texture, the way they drew up slightly with each stroke of my other hand. Xavier's breathing changed—just barely, but I could hear it. The knowledge that I was responsible for that change, that my touch was affecting him, made my chest tight with emotion.

"You're getting hard for me," I said, unable to keep the wonder from my voice as his cock swelled further in my hand. I was painfully aware of my own neglected erection, aching for touch, but the promise of eventual release kept me focused on Xavier's pleasure rather than my own.

"I told you," he replied, "just because I don't experience attraction like you doesn't mean my body doesn't respond." He shifted his hips, pushing into my touch. "Touch me lower."

His legs fell open wider, an invitation that made my cock throb painfully against my borrowed sweats. I stroked behind his balls, over his perineum, watching in fascination as his cock jerked in response, a bead of pre-cum forming at the tip. My mouth watered at the sight, and I had to swallow hard to keep from begging to taste him.

"Do you like that?" I asked, encouraged by his reactions. My own need was a constant presence, an ache that sharpened every sensation, made every touch feel amplified.

Xavier's eyes darkened. "I do. And I'm going to like it even more when you're inside me." He pulled me into a bruising kiss, all teeth and dominance, biting my lower lip hard enough to make me whimper. The sharp pain sent electricity racing through my body, straight to my cock. "Keep touching me," he ordered against my mouth. "Lower."

My finger traced down until they reached his hole. I circled it gently and he let out an encouraging moan against my lips. My cock jerked in my sweats, another surge of pre-cum soaking through the fabric. I shifted, trying to press against the mattress for just a hint of friction.

"God, Xavier," I whispered, my voice breaking. "I need—I want—"

"Did I say you could do that?" Xavier asked sharply, noticing my subtle movement.

I stilled immediately, a whimper escaping me. "No, but I'm dying here. Please, just a little friction."

"Tell me what you want," he commanded, his fingers tangling in my hair and pulling just hard enough to make my scalp tingle. "Be specific."

"I want to be inside you," I gasped, beyond shame at this point. "Want to feel you around me. Want to make you feel good. Please, I'm so fucking hard it hurts."

"What does it feel like?" he asked, ignoring my pleas but watching my face intently. "Touching me there?"

"Like..." I struggled to find words through the fog of desperate arousal clouding my brain. "Like you're trusting me with something nobody else gets to see. Something precious." My hips rocked involuntarily, seeking friction that wasn't there. "Please, Xavier. Can I touch myself? Just a little?"

His expression softened for just a heartbeat before his usual control snapped back into place. "Not yet. You're doing so well, Leo." He reached for the lube in the nightstand, squirting a generous amount onto my fingers. "Now make me feel good, and I promise I'll make you feel good too."

The cool gel warmed quickly between my fingers as I returned to his entrance. Everything I knew about this was from porn and hastily read articles, but the theory was nothing like the reality of actually touching someone this way—of touching Xavier this way. I circled his rim slowly, fascinated by how the tight muscle twitched beneath my touch. The intimacy of it was overwhelming.

"You can massage it more," Xavier instructed, his voice slightly breathier than before. "Don't rush to push inside. Take your time."

I followed his guidance, working the lube around his entrance with gentle pressure, marveling at how responsive he was to my touch. It felt incredible to explore him like this, to discover what made his breath catch or his cock twitch. I continued massaging him, alternating between soft circular motions and firmer pressure, watching his face for reactions.

"Fuck, that feels good," Xavier murmured, his hips shifting slightly to press against my fingers. His eyes were darker than I'd ever seen them, pupils blown wide with arousal. "You're a natural at this."

Pride bloomed in my chest at his praise, even as my own neglected cock throbbed painfully. Sweat beaded on my forehead, my breathing ragged with the effort of restraining myself. Every cell in my body screamed for release, but Xavier's command held me in place more effectively than any physical restraint.

"I love touching you like this," I admitted, my voice rough with need. "Could do it for hours."

A small smile played at the corners of his mouth. "We'll have to test that theory another time." His eyes locked with mine, burning with intensity. "Now push inside. Slowly."

I pressed forward gently, watching in awe as my finger disappeared into his body. The tight heat gripping me was unlike anything I'd ever felt, silky and strong. I whimpered at the thought of that heat surrounding my cock, my hips jerking again in desperate need.

"Oh my god," I breathed, unable to tear my eyes away from where we were connected.

"Keep going," Xavier encouraged, his voice rougher now. "Feel how tight I am? That's what your cock's gonna feel when you're inside me."

As if to emphasize his point, he deliberately clenched around my finger, the sudden tightening of his muscles making me gasp. Then he relaxed, only to clench again, the alternating pressure sending my imagination into overdrive.

"Holy shit," I breathed, mesmerized by the control he had over his body.

A smirk played at the corner of his mouth. "One of many talents you'll discover." He clenched again, tighter this time. "Imagine how that's going to feel around your cock."

The crude words from his usually precise mouth sent heat flooding through me. I pushed deeper, mesmerized by the way his body accepted my intrusion. My own neglected cock throbbed in time with my racing heart, every brush of the fabric against the sensitive head sending shocks of pleasure-pain through my system.

"Curl your finger," he instructed. "Toward my stomach. Find my prostate."

I followed his directions, searching carefully until I felt a slightly firmer spot. When I pressed against it, Xavier's hips jerked, his cock twitching hard against his stomach.

"Fuck, yes," he hissed, the most unguarded reaction I'd seen from him yet. "Right there."

I rubbed the spot again, watching in fascination as a drop of pre-cum beaded at his tip, then slid down his shaft. The visible evidence of his pleasure made me dizzy with want. I squeezed my thighs together, trying to provide some relief to my aching erection without disobeying his command.

"Xavier," I pleaded, voice breaking. "I'm so hard. Please. I need to touch myself. Need to come so badly."

His eyes darkened at my desperation. "No. Not yet. Be good for me just a little longer." His voice was firm, but not unkind. "Another finger. Stretch me open."

The second finger met more resistance, but I worked it in alongside the first, watching Xavier's face for any sign of discomfort. There was none. Only that intensity I'd come to associate with him being fully engaged in something. My neglected cock throbbed with each movement of my fingers inside him, my need building to nearly unbearable levels.

"Scissor them," he demonstrated with his own hand. "Open me up."

I spread my fingers inside him, feeling his body gradually yield, accepting me deeper. Curiosity overwhelmed me, and I couldn't help but look down to see what was happening. The sight of my fingers disappearing into his body, the pinkish rim stretched around them, was mesmerizing. When I scissored my fingers wider, I caught glimpses of his inner walls, slick with lube and flushed a deep rose color that contrasted sharply with his pale skin. It was the most intimate thing I'd ever seen, and knowing that Xavier was letting me see him like this, vulnerable and open, made my chest tight with emotion.

His breathing had quickened, his chest rising and falling more rapidly than usual. A flush had spread across his collarbones, creeping up his neck. My own breathing was ragged, my entire body trembling with the effort of restraining myself. I couldn't help rocking my hips slightly, desperately seeking any friction against my painfully hard cock.

"Be still," Xavier commanded, noticing the movement immediately. "Did I give you permission to move?"

"I can't help it," I gasped, tears of frustration pricking at the corners of my eyes. "I've never been this turned on in my life. Please, Xavier. You're so fucking beautiful like this," I said without thinking, then felt my face heat as the words escaped.

Xavier's eyes locked with mine, something unguarded flashing in their depths. "You too," he admitted roughly. "When you're focused like this. When you're learning to please me."

The praise sent warmth flooding through me, made me want to be even better for him. I added a third finger carefully, watching as his body stretched to accommodate me. His cock lay fully hard against his stomach now, leaking steadily. My own erection strained against my sweats, so sensitive that even the slight movement of air as I shifted sent shudders through me.

"When I let you fuck me," he said, voice hoarse but still unmistakably in charge, "this is what you'll need to do first. Make me ready for you."

The thought of actually being inside him—my cock replacing my fingers in that tight heat—made me groan, my hips jerking involuntarily. A wet spot had formed on my sweats where my cock pressed against the fabric, obvious evidence of how turned on I was just from touching him.

"You want that, don't you?" Xavier observed, a knowing smile playing at his lips.

"Fuck yes," I admitted, beyond embarrassment at this point. "More than anything. Please, Xavier. I'm going crazy here. I need to come so badly."

His smile widened, satisfaction evident in every line of his body. He reached up, tangling his fingers in my hair and pulling me down for another biting kiss.

"You've been so good for me," he murmured against my lips. "So patient. So focused on my pleasure." His hand slid down my chest, over my stomach, to hover just above the waistband of my sweats. "I think you've earned a reward."

I whimpered, my entire body quivering in anticipation. "Please. Yes. Please touch me."

His hand slipped beneath the fabric, wrapping around my achingly hard cock. The first touch of his fingers nearly undid me completely. I had to bite my lip hard to keep from coming instantly.

"Fuck," I gasped, hips jerking into his touch. "Oh god, Xavier. I'm not gonna last. I can't—"

"Let go," he commanded, voice deep with authority. "I want to see you come for me.

It was all the permission I needed. His hand stroked me once, twice, and then I was coming harder than I ever had in my life, pleasure crashing through me in waves that left me gasping and shaking. I couldn't control the direction — some of it splashed across Xavier's thigh and onto his ass, white streaks stark against his pale skin.

"Fuck," I breathed, followed immediately by, “Sorry.”

“It’s all right,” Xavier said and shifted to grab the tissues by the bedside. “Clean it up.”

I did as I was told, trembling and breathing hard.

“Sorry,” I muttered again. I knew he didn’t like to get fluids on him. I should’ve been more careful. Should’ve…

Xavier took my face in his hands. “Stop apologizing and put your fingers back inside me, Leo.”

"What?" I gasped, still dazed from my orgasm.

"Your fingers," he clarified, voice rough with arousal. "Put them back inside me so I can come."

The request sent another aftershock of pleasure through me. Trembling, I squeezed some more lube on my fingers and carefully slid them back into the tight heat of his body. His cock jerked hard at the sensation, another surge of pre-cum spilling onto his stomach.

"God, Xavier," I whispered, awestruck by the intimacy of the act.

Through the haze of my release, I somehow managed to keep my fingers moving inside Xavier, targeting that spot that made his cock jerk and leak.

When my vision cleared, Xavier was watching me with hungry eyes, his own arousal evident in the flush spreading across his chest, the hard length of his cock against his stomach. I curled my fingers deliberately against his prostate, watching as his cock twitched and leaked.

Xavier's breathing had become ragged, his usual control slipping slightly as I continued to work that sensitive spot inside him.

"Keep your fingers right there," he commanded, voice tight with restrained pleasure. "Don't move them. Just press hard when I tell you to."

I nodded, watching in fascination as he wrapped his own hand around his cock. The sight of Xavier Laskin taking control of his own pleasure while using my fingers as a tool sent heat rushing through me all over again.

“Fuck, I’m going to come so hard…” His cock looked impossibly hard in his grip, flushed a deep red at the head, veins standing out prominently along the shaft. "Now," he ordered suddenly, his eyes locking with mine. "Press hard. Right there."

I pushed firmly against his prostate, exactly where he'd shown me earlier. Xavier's back arched, a low groan escaping him as his hand sped up. His muscles clenched tight around my fingers as he worked himself closer to the edge.

"Harder," he gasped. "Milk it out of me."

I increased the pressure, massaging the sensitive spot with firm, circular motions. The crude command coming from Xavier's usually precise mouth sent another jolt of arousal through my spent body.

"Fuck," he hissed, his hips lifting off the bed. "Right there. Don't stop. Oh, fuck. Leo…”

He groaned, my name sounding like both a command and a plea on his lips. Then he was coming, thick white ropes shooting up his stomach and chest, some reaching as high as his collarbone. I'd never seen so much cum from one person before—the evidence of how rarely he allowed himself this release. Each pulse seemed to draw more out as I continued massaging his prostate, his body clenching rhythmically around my fingers.

The intensity of his orgasm left him breathless, his chest heaving as the last tremors subsided. When I started to withdraw my fingers, his hand shot out to grip my wrist.

"Not yet," he said, voice hoarse. "Just hold still for a moment."

I did as instructed, watching in awe as he slowly came back to himself, his breathing evening out, the flush gradually receding from his chest. Only when he gave a slight nod did I carefully withdraw my fingers.

He reached up and pulled me down until our foreheads touched, his hand cupping the back of my neck.

A knock at the door froze us both.

"Xavier? Leo? I made nachos if you boys are hungry!"

Xavier's head dropped back against the headboard with a frustrated groan, his entire body tensing. "Not now, Mom!"

"Are you sure? They're still hot and I got that good queso you like..."

"We're busy!" Xavier's voice had a dangerous edge that would have terrified anyone who knew him well.

There was a pause, then: "Oh! Oh, gotcha. Well, there are condoms and lube in the bathroom cabinet. The good stuff, water-based. And remember, consent is sexy!"

I froze, mortified. The heat of embarrassment spread through me like wildfire, clashing violently with the intimacy of moments before.

"Mom. Jesus Christ. Go away."

"I'm going! Just stay hydrated! And maybe put a sock on the door next time?"

I couldn't help it. The laughter bubbled up from somewhere deep in my chest, hysteria mixing with relief. The absurdity of the situation—of being caught like this, of Xavier's mom offering sex advice through the door—broke through the tension like a sledgehammer.

"Not funny," Xavier growled, but I could feel him fighting back a smile, the muscles of his jaw working against my temple.

"It's kinda funny," I whispered, pressing a kiss to his neck. His skin tasted like salt and smoke, a flavor I was quickly becoming addicted to.

I carefully set about cleaning us both up. Xavier looked equal parts frustrated and amused.

He pulled me close once we were relatively presentable, his arm wrapping around me possessively. "We should probably get dressed and go get those nachos before she comes back with diagrams or something."

I laughed, the sound lighter than it had been in days. "Yeah, that sounds like a solid plan."

As we dressed, I caught Xavier watching me with an expression I'd never seen before—something between wonder and determination, like he'd made an important discovery he was still processing.

"What?" I asked, suddenly self-conscious under his scrutiny.

He shook his head slightly, a small smile playing at his lips. "Nothing. Just thinking about how much more there is for us to explore together."

The promise in his words sent a shiver of anticipation through me, even as my body was still recovering from what we'd just shared. Whatever path we were on, whatever we were becoming together, I knew one thing with absolute certainty: I was exactly where I belonged. With Xavier.