Page 62 of Over My Dead Boss

Outside, an old lady uses her cane to instruct a young employee of the bookstore on where to put a large stand-up display. On it is a picture of me and my debut novel. Under the picture it says: ‘Exclusive Reading With The Author Of The Memorandom Series.’

“It is,” I say and sob at the same time, then jump into my boyfriend’s arms. “You did this?”

“Well, Verna helped, and it looks like Nana has taken care of the rest.” He wipes the tears off my face and gives me a kiss, still making my insides burn just like the first time. “Well, come on then. It’s rude to keep everyone waiting.”

We exit the car and I greet Nana with a long hug.

“Alright now, my dear,” she says after a while and rubs my back. “I am still not planning on dying anytime soon. There will be plenty occasion to hug. Now you need to get inside. I hear your audience is already waiting.”

A bell rings when I step into the store, and all eyes are on me. The store is packed with people, but the first ones I discover are my parents. I shed more tears as I fall into their arms. Dad takes off his oxygen mask to give me a proper embrace while my mom’s face is covered in runny make-up.

When we let go, my dad turn towards the man behind me with a smile. “You must be Popeye,” he extends his arm and they shake hands, “it’s a pleasure to finally meet you in person.”

“The pleasure is all mine, Mr. and Mrs. Ray. Feel free to call me Phoenix though,” he answers with a laugh and greets my mom as well.

“Thank you for organizing all of this,” she says and places another kiss on my cheek.

Eventually, I am introduced to the owner of the bookstore who guides me to a microphone which is placed in front of the rows of people who greet me with a round of applause. I inadvertently blush and feel utterly unprepared. “Thank you everyone. I did not expect this. Partly because this is a surprise reading and partly because I didn’t expect that people would actually want to listen to me read my own book.” I let my eyes wander through the room and discover several people sporting shirts that say ‘Memorandom > Memorandum’ and ‘To quote Memorandom, Act III, Chapter I, Line 69, “Uff.”’. “Since my parents and Nana are present today, I think I better forego the smutty, and instead focus on some of the romantic parts. Anyone up for a Meet Cute?” A slight murmur goes through the crowd as I flip to the appropriate page and begin to read. When I stop, almost an hour has passed. Being fully entranced in my own little world, I barely noticed that anyone was present at all. I look up from my book and the first thing I spy is a pair of dark blue eyes penetrating me, not letting up. They’re complemented by deep dimples and a smile that makes me swoon. Too tall, really not all that dark, features perfectly defined, and all mine. He’s the first to erupt in applause, the crowd following suit right after. I spend the next couple of hours signing copies of my book, answering questions, and daydreaming about disappearing with Phoenix in the bathroom for just ten minutes.

“Could you sign my copy as well, Mrs. Cyrus?” Phoenix asks once the flock of people has thinned out and it’s just us left.

I take the book and give him my best smile. “Of course, I wouldn’t want to disappoint my most loyal of groupies now, would I?” When I flip to the first page, $200 fall into my lap, followed by a suggestive wink from my boyfriend. I grab my pen and quickly write:

If you ever feel stupid, just remember there are people out there who ask their girlfriend for autographs when they could be kissing her right now.

Love,

Olivia Ray

I dot my i’s with hearts and wait for my kiss.