Page 7

Jennifer

I slipped into the hallway, gaze lowered, as I rushed past Steven, hand clenched so tightly around the phone I was pretty sure I’d leave dents in the case. I didn’t stop until I was outside of the building, gulping in fresh air.

I don’t know if I can do this.

If I should do this.

I thumbed open my phone. Alyssa’s name stared up at me from the Recent list like a beacon. I hit call before I could overthink the situation. Well, overthink it more . She answered on the second ring, her voice high-pitched with worry: “Jennifer? Has there been a change?”

I laughed, a short, brittle sound unfamiliar even to me. Thankfully, I’d called her back the night before and updated her in the morning. She was on board with at least half of this craziness. “Oh, there’s been a change, alright.”

A pause. Alyssa, ever the strategist, heard the warning bells behind my words. “Okay. Breathing exercises. Start with that. Then tell me, did they kick you out?”

“No.” I stared down at my hand again. “He’s awake and I’m engaged again.” There was a beat of stunned silence on her end.

Then Alyssa exclaimed, “You’re WHAT?”

I rubbed my forehead with my free hand, feeling a myriad of emotions: foolish, relieved, scared, hopeful, overwhelmed. “When he woke, he remembered me. Looked right at me like I was the center of his damn universe, Lys. And then he asked where my engagement ring was.”

“Oh, shit. Does he have brain damage?”

“I don’t think so. Just partial amnesia.”

“What did you say?”

“Nothing at first. His heart started racing, and I was asked to step into the hallway.”

“Oh, boy.”

“The doctor said Dylan’s memory should come back, but not to push it. He also said we should keep him calm. He wanted to know my exact relationship to Dylan. Steven told him I’m Dylan’s fiancée, then that morally gray human bulldozer slipped me the ring.”

“Not a ring? The ring?”

“Yes.”

“That means Dylan kept it... all this time.”

“Right?”

“How did Steven get it?”

“He works for him. Maybe has access to his place? I don’t know. I didn’t ask. He didn’t say. He just handed me that grenade.”

“And you pulled the pin,” Alyssa said flatly.

I choked out a laugh that sounded dangerously close to a sob. “What was I supposed to do? Throw it back at him like I threw it at Dylan?”

Alyssa whistled low under her breath. “Damn, girl. That’s some next-level rom-com chaos.”

I closed my eyes, feeling the tile cold against the back of my head. “There’s no comedy in this one.”

“That’s a matter of opinion, but I understand that it’s too soon to make jokes. Seriously, how are you holding up?”

“Fine?” I said weakly. “As soon as Dylan saw the ring, his monitors calmed. His heart rate dropped. The nurse smiled at me like I’d personally invented medicine.”

“I don’t know how I feel about that.”

“And then Dylan told me he loved me.”

Alyssa sucked in a breath. “Oh, girl . . .”

Hand over my eyes, I confessed, “And I said it back. Because apparently, in this romantic tragedy, the same man gets to break my heart twice.”

Alyssa was silent for a beat, then said softly, “Technically, the first time, you broke his.”

A rough laugh escaped me. “Not helping.”

“Hey, you don’t want honesty? Don’t call your best friend.”

My lips twisted in reluctant humor. Even married, with two young children probably duct-taping the dog to the couch back home, she was still my sanity call. Still the one who could sort through my chaotic thoughts and help me find my footing. “Thank you for always being there when I need you.”

“Same, sis. If this ends badly,” Alyssa said gently, like she could hear my spiral even through the crackling cell reception, “come here to heal. Remember, we bought a four-bedroom instead of three because of you. We love it when you take a vacation from your vacations.”

“Technically, those vacations are work since the videos are what support me.” I sniffed and joked. “In the world of travel influencers, I’m kind of a big deal.”

“Then I should definitely upgrade your Snoopy bedspread to something more sophisticated.”

I laughed, blinking back stupid tears. “Never. It keeps me humble.”

“Should I break it to you that the kids have begun to use your room as their extra play area?”

“Just means they miss me.”

“Now that’s the truth.” She sighed. “You’re going to be okay, Jen.

You’re a good person with a good heart. I know you’re beating yourself up about this, but don’t.

If Dylan’s memory returns and he doesn’t see how lucky he is to have you back in his life, come see us.

Ted says you’ve always been crazy so don’t worry if you go a little off the rails.

That last part was a joke. He thinks he’s funny. ”

He is. “Thank you for marrying a man who accepts me the way I am.”

She laughed. “You’ve done him the same favor. We’re all crazy in this house. Now, no spinning, no editing, no guilt-tripping yourself to death. Tell me everything, the good, the bad, and the ugly. We’ll figure it out. Like always.”

I looked down at the ring again: bright and blameless.

The good?

He remembered loving me.

The bad?

Being with him this way felt like a mockery of what we had.

The ugly?

I couldn’t tell if I was protecting him or setting us both up for a heartbreak we wouldn’t recover from a second time.

I pressed the phone tighter to my ear, grateful for the only person I knew could unravel this upside-down universe: Alyssa.

“So,” Alyssa said, dragging the word out like she was about to diagnose me with something, “what happens now?”

I groaned and dropped my head back against the building. “I try not to faint when he says something sweet and forgets what year it is?”

“Jennifer.” The voice that answered me wasn’t teasing anymore. It was her mom-voice. The one that could stop any tantrum cold, including mine. “What’s your plan?”

“To pray that someone smarter than me will figure out how to undo amnesia with essential oils and stubborn optimism?”

“Jen,” she said again, firmer this time.

“There is no plan, okay?” I snapped, too loud. “I don’t know what I’m doing here or how long I should stay.”

A woman passed me, giving me a concerned look.

I moved to a bench and lowered my voice.

“Being here while he remembers me, but only the good parts, feels wrong, Alyssa. He doesn’t know I broke his heart and disappeared into years of a self-improvement sabbatical that included three continents and a very unflattering haircut. ”

“It wasn’t that unflattering.”

“You’re contractually obligated to say that.”

“It was brave,” she added diplomatically. “And by brave, I mean... misguided but emotionally important.”

I let out a half-laugh, half-sob. “How are you taking all of this so calmly?”

“It’s called exhaustion,” she said. “It comes from having kids. And also from knowing love includes accepting that Ted will always leave wet towels everywhere... forever, and I can both love him and want to cut holes in his favorite socks whenever I find them in the living room.”

“Romantic.”

“Marriage is beautiful. Emotionally. Metaphorically. Spiritually. But occasionally there are laundry-related homicidal hiccups.”

“Homicidal hiccups. Please don’t kill Ted. I like him.” I laughed again, and it broke the panicked hold on my chest just enough to let me breathe.

“I’ll probably keep him alive so I can torture him by buying more chickens next spring. He thinks we have enough. Are there ever enough?” she asked.

“I plead the fifth on that one.”

After a pause, Alyssa’s tone became serious. “All joking aside, this is complicated and risky for both of you. Dylan almost died. You’re lying to protect him, but also lying .”

I looked down at my ring again. It gleamed in the sunlight like a promise of good things to come.

“I need to do this for him,” I whispered.

“If pretending we’re still together gives Dylan time to heal, it’s worth risking that he might be angry with me when his memory returns.

I feel like this is the right choice.” My voice cracked. “I hope it is.”

Alyssa said, “He needs this for now. But prepare yourself, Jen. This could go sideways fast. One wrong word. One memory returning. He might misunderstand your motivation. Are you prepared for that?”

“No.”

“Good,” she said. “Because if you said yes, I’d call the hospital and have you admitted for delusions of romantic grandeur.”

“Is that a clinical term?”

“It should be.” She sighed. “I’m worried about you.”

“I’m worried about me too.” My joke fell flat.

“Ted says his mom can come to mind the kids if I want to go sit with you and watch this play out firsthand.”

I smiled. “Ted’s a good guy.”

“Do you need me?” she asked.

“No,” I whispered. “You belong with your kids.” I thought about Dylan’s parents. It gutted me that they weren’t at the hospital. “I need to run an idea by you. Tell me if it’s a bad one.”

“Oh, boy. I mean, yay.”

“Jerk. Something has been bothering me: no one has mentioned Dylan’s parents since I arrived.”

“You told me he stopped talking to them.”

“Yes, but he also stopped talking to me .” I looked across the parking lot at the cars whizzing by on the road. “No matter how angry your child is with you, wouldn’t you want to know if they were hurt?”

“I would.”

“Then I should tell them.”

“He might hate you for that.”

“He can add it to the list.”

“They might upset him. Didn’t you say he needs to be kept calm?”

“They were good people, Alyssa. Not perfect, but neither was I. If I tell them the situation, I don’t think they’d do anything to endanger him.”

“You know them better than I do.”

“Knew them.” I swallowed hard. “Alyssa, I was part of the reason he stopped talking to them.”

“Don’t you dare put the blame for all of that on your shoulders. For a relationship to explode the way theirs did, there were already problems.”