Page 8 of One Lustful Summer (Texas Summer #14)

Maggie

The Pauling Farmer’s Market is a buzz on Saturday morning. There are tents set up with vegetables, fruits, sourdough bread, cookies, muffins, meat packages, eggs, and different homemade items.

I have tried to stop by each tent. Currently, I’m browsing through a tent that offers goat’s milk soap. I take my time smelling the different concoctions, each one a new and intriguing smell. I settle on a lavender brick and a blueberry brick of goat’s milk soap; I pay the vendor and walk out of the tent in search of Lauren.

I almost declined Lauren’s invitation last night when she texted, but I’m glad I didn’t. It’s a pleasant reprieve from working on the house. I had hopes that my little adventure today would get me out of my funk. I’ve spent too much time thinking of the could have been kisses with Rowan.

I had heard of farmer’s markets, but never visited one before. It seemed everyone that lived in Pauling was downtown, visiting the tents and getting their purchases for the week. My fabric grocery bag is over loaded already with two large zucchinis, a bunch of carrots, and a head of broccoli. All great ingredients to make a large stir-fry.

I find Lauren coming back from the lemonade trailer, two big, oversized plastic containers filled with freshly squeezed lemonade. Half lemons still resting in the container’s bottom.

”Here you go, girl,”

Lauren says as she hands one to me.

“Thank you,”

I answer, bringing the straw to my lips. I take a sip, the taste explodes on my tongue. The sweetness, the bitterness, everything working together. It is cool and refreshing on this hot and humid morning.

“Oh, thanks. I needed that.”

“Did you find some soaps?”

Lauren asks.

I nod and show her the soaps I found, and she takes a sniff, oohing over the smell.

“Lulu,”

a little girl yells as she runs up to Lauren, throwing herself against her legs and squeezing. She’s so cute, her lopsided pigtails swaying with her movements.

Lauren’s eyes light up in excitement at the little girl. She bends down to her eye level.

“Hey, Jodi. Who you here with today?”

“Daddy and I came to take a look at what everyone has, and then to the diner for a late breakfast.”

There is a familiarity between Lauren and Jodi. Like they have known each other forever. Green eyes stare back at me, reminding me of eyes that I have been trying to forget all morning.

“Jodi-bug,”

a gruff voice calls from behind me. The voice is familiar, sending goosebumps down my arms. I turn to the side and see Rowan, his eyes on the little girl as he walks closer to us.

“Hey, Daddy!”

Jodi answers with gusto.

Daddy? Rowan is a dad? Is he married? Where is her mother? Is that why he wouldn’t kiss me? Is he involved with Jodi’s mother? My breath rushes out as the questions swirl in my head.

Rowan’s head whips my way. His eyes widen when he sees me standing next to Lauren. He must have been so focused on his daughter that he didn’t notice me.

His daughter. I did not expect this turn of events. I guess I have been misreading every interaction I have had with him.

“Maggie,”

Rowan states with a smile. He doesn’t look guilty or concerned that I’ve come face to face with his daughter. That eases a little of my confusion.

“Hi, Miss Maggie. I’m Jodi.”

The little girl steps away from Lauren and stands in front of me. She is so outspoken and cute. She isn’t aware of the internal turmoil I’m having.

“Nice to meet you, Jodi,”

I tell her as I crouch down to her level like Lauren did. She sticks her little hand out and I give her a gentle shake.

When I stand back up, Jodi is telling her dad that she’s ready to eat. Jodi asks Lauren and me to come as well. Lauren agrees and looks over to me.

“I don’t want to impose,”

I tell the group.

“You’re not,”

Rowan answers as he comes to stand closer to me.

“I’d like you to come,”

he says quietly so that only I can hear.

“I’d like that, too.”

I tell him. Rowan slips the bag off my shoulder and walks next to me with his hand on my lower back as we follow Lauren and Jodi to the diner.

“So, you have a daughter?”

I ask after a minute. I know I should probably keep my thoughts to myself. But there are so many things I want to know.

“I do,”

he answers with a smirk.

“What about her mom?”

Shit, did I really just come out and ask that.

“Sorry, it’s none of my business.”

“She’s not in the picture. It’s just me and Jodi.”

He stops a few feet from the entrance and looks at Lauren and Jodi.

“Y’all grab a booth. We’ll be right in.”

Lauren nods and heads inside with Jodi. I turn towards Rowan so we are face to face.

“I’m gonna be completely open with you here, Maggie. I know we don’t know each other that well, but there’s something there. I want to see what that is. But, I also have a little girl that is my world. If you think there’s something here as well, then let’s go eat. If it’s too much for you, then I ask that you bow out now.”

Rowan takes a breath and watches me.

There’s so much to unpack in his words. And while he’s direct, I admire how he is looking out for his little girl. I also love the fact that he has voiced the pull between us. It lets me know that this feeling is not one-sided.

“I feel it, too. And I respect that your daughter comes first. Now let’s go eat.”

He grins and shakes his head. A deep chuckle escapes his lips. His hand clasps mine and we head into the diner.

I thought his hand at my lower back was exquisite. Scratch that, his hand in mine — palm to palm, shoots warmth up my arm.

Lauren raises an eyebrow when we approach the table. Her eyes ping from our joined hands up to mine, a small smile gracing her lips. She has Jodi on her side of the booth, allowing Rowan and me to sit next to each other.

I’m not sure if that was intentional or not, but I’m not complaining. Now that I know where he stands, some nerves and uncertainty have disappeared.

The waitress is quick to take our orders. Jodi insisted I try the French Toast. And I couldn’t complain, because who doesn’t like pan fried bread lathered in butter with powdered sugar sprinkled on top.

While we wait for our food, Jodi captivates the whole table.

“What did the mother cow say to her calf?”

Jodi asks the table. Lauren and Rowan snicker at her question. Jodi looks at each adult and then blurts out.

“It’s pasture bedtime!”

Her giggles are infectious and we all laugh along.

Jodi catches her breath and hits us with another one.

“Why did the cow want to get in the rocket ship?”

She gives us less time to think of an answer before she gives us the punch line.

“He wanted to go to udder space!”

We all laugh at her antics. She is the cutest little girl.

Before she has time to give another joke, our food is being delivered. Throughout the meal, I notice the small things Rowan does for her. He’s attentive to her needs, but also allows her to try to figure things out herself first. He waits for her to ask for help.

He doesn’t fuss when she gets syrup on the table, or dribbles a little milk on her shirt. There’s no frustration from him when she asks for some of his eggs. He takes it all in stride.

It’s so different from how I was brought up. You didn’t dare to make a mess, no matter how small of a crumb. There was no way I could have been cracking jokes at a public outing. It would have been unheard of. My upbringing ingrained in me the idea that children should be seen and not heard.

It was refreshing to see the grass was greener on the other side. Watching Rowan with his daughter enforced my thoughts on how I wanted to be as a parent. Patient and understanding. Helpful and guiding. Yes, there would be times I had to discipline, but it would be different from what I had endured.

After we finished eating , and Rowan’s insistence with covering the bill, we all headed out and say our goodbyes.