Page 163 of One Good Crash

"Well…" I hesitated. "I guess I wouldn't put it past her."

"You don’thaveto guess," she said. "I'm telling you, she's totally faking."

"How do you know?"

"Because, she's standing in the doorway, blathering on about how awful she's got it, and what a rotten niece you are—"

"I'm notreallyher niece."

"Yeah. I know. But she's milking that cow for all it's worth."

Well, that was an image I didn't need.

Allie was still talking. “According toher, you're totally breaking her heart."

Sure I was.I muttered, "As if she had one."

"No kidding," Allie said. "But anyway, I go to slam the door in her face—"

"Seriously?"

"Well, yeah," Allie said. "I mean, there's only so much Tabitha I can take."

I knew the feeling. Still, I had to say, "Yeah, but didn't you feel at least alittlebad about her arm?"

"Hell no. Because like I said, she's totally faking."

"Yeah, but—"

Allie held up a hand. "Just lemme finish, okay? So I go to slam the door, and quick as anything, she grabs it..."Allie grinned. "…withthe arm that's supposedly hurt."

"Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm sure. She's wearing the sling remember?"

Ididremember, but the whole thing still bothered me. "Yeah, I know." I grimaced. "But I still wish that security guy hadn't done that."

Allie gave a decisive shake of her head. "It wasn't a guy."

"It wasn't?"

"No. It was a woman. You didn't know?"

"Actually, I didn't ask." Probably, I should've, but it was a subject I'd been studiously avoiding.

"And besides," Allie said, "even if the armwashurt, it was Tabitha's own fault.'

"Why? For not leaving?"

"No." Allie paused. "Well, yes. That too. But what I mean is that she fell on her arm when she took a flying leap for Rosie."

I shook my head. "Rosie?"

"Yeah. The so-called goon." Allie gave a distracted flutter of her hands. "But you didn't let me finish. So last night, I tell Tabitha that she's a giant faker, and she flips out."

I frowned. "What'd she do?"

"Well, first, she rips off the sling and throws it on the floor, and then…" Allie gave a dramatic pause. "She yells, 'Where's my fucking lobster!'"