Page 25 of Once Upon a Christmas Carol

As Carol helped a very tired Maria into her pajamas, she realized she couldn’t hop on a plane and leave her like she’d imagined. Besides being selfish, it was cowardly and perhaps just plain stupid.

“Did you have a good evening?” Carol asked as she eased her into the bed.

“Yes. It was much better than I imagined possible.” Maria fumbled to tug the quilt with her good arm.

Carol reached down to help arrange the covers. “I hope it didn’t wear you out too much.”

“I expect I’ll sleep well.” She gazed up at Carol. “You know what I enjoyed the most tonight?”

“No.” Carol tucked the quilt under her aunt’s chin, then straightened.

“Seeing you and Victor dancing.” She smiled dreamily. “It was just beautiful.”

“Uh-huh.” Carol didn’t really want to dwell on Victor.

“And I was so glad when he took Victoria home.”

“Really?” Carol crossed her arms in front of her.

“You know he only took that girl to the cotillion out of obligation. But you can’t expect a fellow to play the gentleman when he’s being treated like that.” She frowned. “I suspect tonight was the end of that relationship. And I say good riddance to Victoria.”

“I wouldn’t be too sure about that.”

“What do you mean?”

Carol shrugged.

“Tell me why you’re not so sure about that.” Maria patted the bed and Carol reluctantly sat.

“Well, I, uh, overheard Victoria and her friends in the ladies’ room.”

Maria’s eyes widened. “And?”

“One of her friends seemed to have inside information about an engagement ring that Victoria was going to receive for Christmas.”

Maria laughed. “Well, that’s nonsense.”

“I don’t know. She seemed pretty confident.”

“But you saw the two of them bickering.”

“Maybe that was just a lovers’ quarrel. For all we know, they’ve made up by now.” She fiddled with the quilt pattern. “That would explain why Victor didn’t return to the cotillion.”

“Oh ...” Maria’s brow creased. “I didn’t think of that.”

“Victoria is a very beautiful woman,” Carol continued. “And I suspect when she wants to, she can be very sweet ... and persuasive.”

“Don’t you mean manipulative?”

Carol shrugged again, then stood. “Well, I know you must be tired. I know I am.”

“Victor is too smart to be manipulated by her,” Maria declared.

Carol leaned down to kiss her aunt’s cheek. “Well, I’m not going to worry about that tonight.”

Maria’s eyes flickered with interest. “So you do care?”

Carol forced a smile. “Victor is a nice guy. I’d hate to see him settle for the wrong woman.”

Maria nodded. “Especially when the right woman might be waiting in the wings.”

“Good night, Aunt Maria.” Carol turned off the light. “Sweet dreams.”

“You too, dear girl. I’m going to pray that your dream guy visits your dreams.”

“Go ahead. Knock yourself out.” Carol shook her head as she closed the door.

Her aunt was one determined woman. As for being visited by her “dream guy,” she seriously doubted it.

As she got herself ready for bed, Carol did her best to block Victor from her thoughts, but as soon as she lay down, she remembered how fun it was to dance with him and how magical it felt to be in his arms. Despite her resolve, she had a feeling her aunt’s prayers would be answered tonight.

****

Right after breakfast the following morning, Maria insisted on deep cleaning her house. “Our Christmas Eve party is just two days out now,” she told Carol, “and I always like to put the polish on the place.”

“Can’t we do that tomorrow?” Carol slid a plate into the dishwasher. It wasn’t that she was tired herself, but she suspected Maria was still worn-out from last night.

“Tomorrow we’ll go over and help Antonia get food ready for Christmas Eve. Then we bring half of it over here and Antonia brings the rest Christmas Eve. So our day will be full.”

Carol didn’t see how fixing food could take a whole day but assumed her aunt knew what she was talking about. “Well, I’ll try my best to make your house sparkle and shine,” she told her. “Just tell me what needs doing.”

“The guest bathroom, for starters. It needs a thorough going-over.”

“As soon as I get the breakfast things cleaned up, I’m on it.”

All morning, Carol did her best to stay one step ahead of her aunt.

By the time she had the bathroom spotless, she had no doubts that Maria was one of the most driven women she’d ever met.

Even with one arm, she was a force to be reckoned with.

But when Carol found her nearly toppling over as she used her good arm to sweep pine needles from the hardwood floor onto a dustpan she was balancing on one foot, she had to step in.

“Let me do that.” She took the broom and handed Maria the dustrag. “Why don’t you dust instead?”

“Yes, yes, I’m afraid I’m making more of a mess than anything. But I want to help. I feel so useless.”

“I doubt anyone has ever considered you useless. Don’t forget that yours is a temporary condition.”

“I suppose you’re right. But it does make me feel old. I hate feeling old.”

They chattered back and forth as they worked together, but when Carol got out the vacuum cleaner, she encouraged Maria to sit down.

“But I haven’t wiped the woodstove yet.”

Carol took the dustrag from her and quickly wiped down the woodstove. “There. Now let me get the vacuuming done without having you underfoot.” She pointed to Maria’s favorite chair. “You need a break.”

“Yes, I suspect I could use a little rest.”

“Thank you.” Carol smiled victoriously as she turned on the vacuum cleaner.

She was just finishing up the area rug in the foyer when she thought she heard a phone ringing and then her aunt speaking loudly.

Turning off the noisy machine, Carol listened.

After a few seconds, she realized Maria was talking to her sister.

Curious but not wanting to eavesdrop, she headed for the kitchen to make them both a cup of tea.

As the kettle heated, she couldn’t help but notice that Maria wasn’t saying much, just the occasional “yes, uh-huh, I understand” peppered in here and there, which seemed to suggest that Mom was doing all the talking.

Hopefully she wasn’t being too hard on her sister.

Just as the kettle whistled, the phone conversation came to an end. Maria thanked Rosa for calling her. Then, as Carol poured hot water over the loose-leaf tea in the teapot, she heard Maria’s footsteps behind her.

“Sounded like you were talking to my mom.” She turned with a stiff smile, setting the teapot on the kitchen table. “So I thought we might both need a cup of tea.”

“Tea and sympathy?” Maria sat down with a deflated sigh. “My sister ... she can be a bit contrary.”

Carol laughed as she set cups on the table.

“There’s a tin of shortbread in the pantry,” Maria told her. “I think I could use some.”

“Good idea.”

When they were both seated with tea and cookies, Carol asked her aunt if she wanted to talk about it.

Maria’s eyes got teary. “Rosa must really think that I’m evil. She blames me for everything that’s gone wrong in her life. And I agree that I wasn’t a very good mother to her—”

“You weren’t her mother though. You were a kid. You’d lost your mother too. My mom is so egocentric. Of course, she blames you. She can’t take the responsibility for herself.”

“Well, I’m to blame for that too. I never made her take responsibility as a child.”

“But she’s not a child now. Even if she acts like one. And think about it, Aunt Maria. Mom was a pretty pathetic mother to me growing up. And, well, I don’t like to toot my own horn, but I didn’t turn out too badly.” She grimaced. “I hope.”

Maria beamed at her. “You turned out perfectly.”

“Well, I’m not sure I’d say perfect. But thanks.”

Maria picked up a second cookie.

“Maybe the good news is that Mom wanted to talk to you,” Carol added. “I assume she called you.”

“She did.” Maria sighed. “Caught me by surprise too.”

“So, in her way, maybe she’s trying.” Carol sipped her tea.

“Maybe. And it might be my imagination, but I think she was a little more reasonable at the end of the conversation.”

Probably not reasonable enough to apologize for her bad behavior. That would be too much to expect of Mom.

“I just hope the conversation was therapeutic for her. Perhaps it helped her to work through some things.” Maria pursed her lips. “I’d like to think some good might come of it. For your mother, anyway.”

“What Mom really needs is a good therapist.” Carol snickered, then felt guilty.

“I know I don’t really understand her, but I’ve believed for some time that she’s an honest-to-goodness narcissist. And based on what I’ve read, narcissists are hard to help, because they’re so certain they’re right and everyone else is wrong.

Because of that, they seldom change. But it seems worth a try.

Maybe I’ll gently suggest she get some professional help.

” Then maybe she’ll stop dumping her problems on everyone else.

“Or maybe we just need to be praying for her.” Maria set down her empty teacup. “And forgiving her ... and loving her ... unconditionally.”

Carol nodded but felt guilty as she gathered up the tea things.

Was she honestly doing those things herself?

She remembered how she’d once told her mother that refusing to forgive another was like eating poison and expecting the one you were angry with to get sick and die.

Yet wasn’t she withholding forgiveness from Mom?

Instead of dealing with her worries, she distracted herself with housework.

By the end of the day, the house was spotless, she was exhausted, and Maria was worn-out too.

They both turned in early. But as Carol lay awake in her bed, she could no longer distract herself.

She really did need to forgive her mom .

.. before it ate her alive ... or poisoned her.

She knew she needed help to do this and so she prayed, honestly telling God that she felt powerless against her feelings.

By the time she finished praying, she could tell something inside of her had changed.

Oh, she might feel different by tomorrow and need to go through the whole process again, but for the moment, she felt that she’d forgiven her mother.

She thanked God, took in a deep breath, and prepared herself for a good night’s sleep.