Page 39 of Omega's Fever
“Stocking up.” My voice comes out steadier than I feel.
“Smart. Never know when you might need extra supplies.” He begins stacking his supplies on the belt behind mine. “Dangerous city sometimes. Weather can turn bad, power outages, all sorts of unexpected problems.”
The cashier scans my items. Beep. Beep. Beep.
“Just last week,” the man continues, voice conversational but with an undertone that makes my skin crawl, “lawyer friend of mine got mugged. Broad daylight, right downtown. Two blocksfrom the courthouse, can you believe it? Makes you think about being careful.”
I hand my card to the cashier, proud that my hand barely shakes. “That’s unfortunate.”
“Very unfortunate. Poor guy ended up in the hospital. Broken ribs, punctured lung. All because he wasn’t paying attention to his surroundings.” His smile widens. “Makes you think about being careful. Watching who you associate with. Some people bring trouble just by existing, you know?”
The threat is so politely delivered that for a moment I wonder if I’m imagining it. But the cold calculation in his eyes tells me I’m not.
“Have a good day now,” he says, as the cashier hands me my receipt. “Stay safe out there.”
I gather my bags and leave quickly, not quite running but not exactly walking either. Outside, the morning sun feels too bright, too normal for what just happened. I pull out my phone with fingers that have progressed from trembling to full-on shaking.
“Milo?” Kao answers on the second ring, and the sound of his voice almost makes me sob with relief. “How’s big and handsome treating you?”
“I need you to come over.”
“Now?”
“Please.” The word comes out cracked and desperate. “I just... I need backup. I need a friend. I just want someone to talk to.”
His tone shifts immediately from casual to concerned. “What happened? Are you okay? Did Hayes do something?”
“No, no, Kellen hasn’t... It’s not him.” I start walking, needing to move even though I’m not sure where I’m going. “Can you just come? Please?”
“Where are you?”
“I’ll wait in the park across from my building. The one with the fountains.”
“I’ll leave in five.”
I lug the groceries back, taking them with me as I cross to the park. I keep my eyes peeled as I move but the man is gone and I relax. He delivered his message and he left.
I can see my windows from here, three floors up, curtains drawn tight courtesy of Kellen’s midnight redecorating.
He’d moved furniture for hours last night, creating defensive positions and blocking sightlines, turning my apartment into a fort. I’d thought he was paranoid. Now I’m not so sure.
I laugh out loud. One paranoid alpha, one drugged to the gills omega. Aren’t we the perfect pair?
The suppressants weight down my jacket pocket, their home for weeks now. I pull the bottle out and stare at the label.
I’ve been taking more than the recommended dose for weeks.
This is what I’ve become. Twenty-seven years old, successful lawyer, prime matched to an accused criminal, and I can’t function without chemical assistance. The trembling in my hands is from the suppressants so is the endless nausea. The pills are literally poisoning me. But knowing doesn’t make that doesn’t mean I can stop.
Uncle Kenneth’s voice echoes in my head, years of criticisms compressed into a greatest hits album. Stand up straight, Milo. Speak clearly, Milo. Don’t embarrass the family, Milo. Omegas have to work twice as hard for half the respect, Milo.
A woman jogs past pushing a running stroller. She doesn’t spare me a glance, just another man having a crisis on a park bench. The city’s full of us.
I look at the suppressants again. Such small things to cause such massive damage.
They’re supposed to give me control, to let me function in an alpha’s world without being overwhelmed by the demands of my body.
Instead, they’ve turned me into exactly what Uncle Kennethalways said I was: weak, shaking, unable to handle the real world without chemical assistance.