Page 42

Chapter 41

Nazriel

T he air is cold in the courtyard, the stone beneath my feet is damp, chilled from the drizzle earlier, and the wind carries the scent of rain and earth. I pace the perimeter of the courtyard, my boots scuffling against the uneven stones, each step loud in the silence.

Selestina.

Her name clings in my mind, impossible to get clear of. Every time I think that I've pushed her out, she worms her way back in with that sharp tongue and those defiant eyes. My fists clench at my sides as I stop at the edge of the fountain, water trickling softly in the background, its cadence mocking my turmoil. Sprites play about like they have no idea of the shitstorm happening all around them.

What was she bruised from? Who did that to her?

“Pacing like that won't solve anything, you know.” Nasarea's voice cuts through the quiet, light but sharp enough to catch my attention. She leans against one of the pillars, arms crossed, her usual smirk absent.

I don't answer immediately, instead letting the silence stretch between us. She steps closer to me, her boots silent in the damp stones. Eventually, I blow out a breath, tension not budging in my shoulders. “What do you want, Nasarea?”

She rolls her eyes, unimpressed by my tone. “To know why you're looking like you are in a mood to set all of the academy on fire.”

“Maybe I should,” I mutter, raking a hand through my hair. “It might save us all some trouble.”

Her gaze narrows, and she takes another step closer, the space between us contracting. “Selestina is?—”

Her name shoots a spike of more rage through me and I face her fully. “Don't,” I warn low. “Don't start.”

“Start what?” she snaps, her arms dropping to her sides. “Start defending her? Because someone has to, Nazriel. Gods know you’re doing enough tearing her down for all of us.”

I scoff, turning back to the fountain. The cool mist sprays my face, a welcome reprieve from the heat building in my chest. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Don't I?” she replies , her voice rising a little. “Because it sure seems like you're letting whatever this is between you and her get to you. And for what? Because she bruises your ego? Because she doesn't bow to you like everyone else?”

I whirl back around, my fists clenched at my sides. “She's dangerous, Nasarea. You don't see it, but I do. She's a walking storm, waiting to destroy everything in her path.”

“And yet here you are,” she says, stepping closer, her voice softer and no less cutting. “Destroying everything in your path.”

She cuts too close to the truth, and I despise it. Despise how right she is, how Selestina has me coming unraveled in ways I have no control over. My jaw tightens, clenching hard. “She's tearing us apart, Nasarea. Look at us. Look at you. You're defending her like she’s some saint, but she's not.”

Nasarea's face changes then, her features hardening into something I rarely see on her; anger, cold and unrelenting. “You don't get to talk about her like that,” she snaps, her voice breaking with emotion. “Not after everything she's been through.”

The raw edge in her tone cuts me short, and for one moment, all I can do is stare at her. She takes a breath, her shoulders rising and falling as she struggles to steady herself. “You don't know her, Nazriel. Not really. You see what you want to see, but you don't know her.”

“And you do?” I snap, my tone bitter. “What, did she bare her soul to you in some kind of midnight confession?”

My eyes widen. “You saw her memories.” I rush to her. “Tell me everything.”

Her eyes flash, and she takes a step backward. “I've seen enough to know that whatever judgment you've passed on her, she doesn't deserve it. I am not betraying her trust, Nazriel. I love you. You are my brother, my best friend. But…I need other friends too. And Selestina is someone I want in my corner.”

The silence hanging in the air is louder than I can take. Behind us, the fountain bubbles, its sound a sad companion to the tension hanging between us. I swallow hard, my throat tight, and look away, the weight of her words settling deep in my chest.

“She's not innocent,” I say finally, quieter but no less firm. “She's hiding something, Nasarea. I can feel it.”

“Of course she's hiding something,” she snaps, irritation lacing into her tone. “We all are. But maybe, instead of tearing her apart for it, just leave her the hell alone.”

Her words sting sharper than I'd like to admit. A bitter laugh forces its way from my lips and I shake my head. “Playing her friend like some grand act of charity?”

Her face sags a little, hurt dancing across her features before solidifying into defiance. “She doesn't need my charity, Nazriel. She’s stronger than either of us can imagine. But she does deserve a friend, and gods help me, I'm going to be one for her, even if you won't.”

Her words render me momentarily speechless, the fire in her voice more than I'm prepared to face. I don't know what to say, how to bridge the widening chasm between us. I feel like I'm losing her, losing us, and I don't know how to stop it.

“I don't trust her,” I admit finally, my voice low and raw.

“And maybe that's your problem,” Nasarea replies, her voice soft now, though the fire within her eyes hasn't dulled. “You don't trust her because you're scared of what she makes you feel.”

The words hang between us, undeniable. I look away, hands clenching and flexing at my sides. The truth is, she's right. Selestina terrifies me, not because of what she's hiding, but because of what she's doing to me. I love the way she challenges me. How she makes me feel. Running into her, arguing with her, is always the highlight of my day. What I look forward to.

Nasarea steps back, her face unreadable now. “You don't have to trust her,” she says quietly. “But maybe you should start asking yourself why she gets under your skin so much. ”

And with that, she turns and walks away, leaving me alone in the courtyard, the chill of the air refusing to douse the fire burning in my chest. I stare after her, my head a muddled mess, but all I can see is Selestina's face, as if she is some ghost I am unable to shake from my mind.