Page 51 of Of Rime and Ruin (Sirens of Adria #2)

Chapter forty-eight

Aethan

We fall into a pattern: Lucas’s magic pierces my skull, the Beast ruins the spell, and I let it happen again and again.

Searching, pulling, searing pain. As soon as the Beast awakens, it’s over.

I lose control, the Beast fights back, and I’m left panting and sore.

Each time we fail, Lucas glares at me, that disappointed scowl plastered on his face.

So fucking predictable.

My head throbs with an insatiable ache, right behind my eyes. No tincture can ease the pain.

When the session is over, I absorb into the darkness of my chambers, shying away from all sources of light. No candles. No fire. Just shadows.

It’s what I deserve. What I asked for—this is the price to pay for Nahla’s safety, and I will pay it, no matter the cost.

I let my magic consume me, leaking from my hands without direction. I fill my chamber with snow. Ice. It drips from the ceiling, crawls on the floor. I shiver in the dark.

At some point, my magic takes direction, and my hands carve and bend, forming soft shapes in the snow.

A face. Button nose. Smooth, plump lips.

Her hair tumbles past her waist, and I smooth her hips with care, tracing each perfect curve, until she stands before me in perfect replica.

Her face is white, her eyes glassy and unseeing.

Full of pain. Along her ribs, I carve three scars. There.

Even in ice, Nahla tortures me.

My chest aches with grief, heavy and cold. I deserve this. I’m a monster.

I touch her face, and she crumbles beneath my thumb.

***

Come for me.

Her Voice reaches through the fog of my thoughts, hooking me like a lure. My spine straightens at her call. Scales rise on my neck, and my heart lurches into a desperate rhythm.

My body moves, rising from my desk chair. I do not stop myself. I do not fight. Her sweet melody rings in my ears, wraps around my soul, and I am weak to the sound. I can’t resist her any longer.

I stumble into the dimly lit hallway, down the corridor, and into the East Wing.

Come.

The closer I get to her, the stronger the pull.

Perrin stands guard at her door, wringing his hands nervously. “Your Majesty!” he balks. “I didn’t know if I… Should I make her stop singing?”

I hardly hear him. Her Voice is strong, the only thing that can hold my attention.

I growl, too far gone for words. He steps back and hands me the key. I jam it into the lock and turn it with a satisfying click. The door swings inward, and I inhale her sweet scent.

She’s aroused.

My hand grips the doorknob, suddenly the only thing grounding me in time and place. Nahla stretches out on the rug before the fireplace, propped on her elbows like a fire-lit goddess. Singing her summoning spell with a glorious smile. Completely naked.

Her fingers dangle in front of her pussy, glistening wet.

Fuck.

I clear my throat. “Perrin, leave us.” Stepping into the room, I close the door before he can answer.

She beckons me with a crooked finger. Her alto Voice rolls through my head, low and seductive. Come to me, Beasty.

My cock hardens instantly. Goddess above. Why have I been resisting her so long? Is it that necessary? The Beast hasn’t ruined her beyond repair, as I feared. She’s healthy and glowing. Irresistible.

I stride toward her. Drop to my knees. Crawl. Like the fucking Beast I am.

That’s a good boy.

Her praise lifts my heart, and my chest tightens at its expanse. Why the fuck did I leave her alone?

“Nahla…” I groan, her name choking me. I don’t deserve to have that name bless my lips. Not after what I’ve done. Still, I straddle her, dipping my nose to her neck. Warm vanilla paradise. Goddess, how I missed her smell. I press a kiss to the soft hollow of her throat. “Nahla, I’m so—”

“Don’t.” Her finger stops my lips. I pull back to study her face.

She watches me with a glint in her eyes, mischief on her mouth. Her song continues, blocking out any emotional connection we’ve previously shared and making her unreadable. Warning bells ring in my mind, but I ignore them.

I need her. Now. I need to show her how sorry I am, how badly I fucked up. How much I’ve regretted every minute I’ve spent apart from her. I want to tell her everything—the curse, my plan with Lucas, how I’m doing it for her. How I’m making damn sure she’ll be safe with me.

But her finger is in the way.

I growl, pushing it aside. “I hurt you. And I’m a fucking fool for it.”

Her spell fades into silence, and the quiet crackle of the fire replaces the sound of her siren song. She cocks her eyebrow. Her knees lift from the floor, parting to cage my hips. Hooking around me. Pulling me closer.

Forget explanations. I’ll tell her everything as soon as I’ve pounded her into the floor with my cock.

I groan, heartbeat thundering through me. My erection rests between her legs, prodding her sweet, naked pussy. I can feel her heat through the leather of my pants. “Fuck, you’re so wet. Is this for me?”

Is this how she’ll forgive me? Do I even fucking deserve it?

“No,” she says.

I blink, confused.

Her legs tighten like a vise. Hands slide up my back, fingers twisting into the base of my hair. And then, with a gleeful smile, she flips me.

My head slams into the floor so hard that stars dance. Nahla perches on top of my stomach and wraps her hands around my throat.

“Asshole,” she snarls. Gone is the playful look on her face.

Gone is her smile. Tears brim in her eyes, reflecting the light of the fire.

A single drop spills over and trails down her cheek.

She loosens her hold on my neck, her thumb tracing aimless circles as her bottom lip trembles.

“Hot chocolate and romance novels. Is that all you think I need to be happy? You fucking cunt.” She spits the last word.

I see them now: the books are scattered by the fire. At least fifty, sprawled haphazardly. A few stones have been tossed into the flame, glowing red-hot among the coals. I’m a fucking idiot if I thought she’d be appeased so easily.

“But you like those things,” I say. I reach to wipe her spray from my cheek, but she grabs my wrist and pins it to the rug.

“You locked me in here for four fucking days, Aethan. And you expect I’ll welcome you with open legs.”

Heat flushes my cheeks. I knew it was too good to be true.

She smirks. “The pretty king is blushing. I suppose that’s answer enough.”

“Nahla,” I breathe. Pushing from the floor, I swivel into a seated position and pull my cloak around us to swaddle her naked form. “Come here, Sunfish.”

She melts into my chest. The point of her nose slides over my shirt, back and forth. I tuck her head beneath my chin and rest in her soft curls. My hand roams her back, catching on the fresh scars on her ribs. I skim them gingerly as a deep ache builds in my chest.

These are the marks of a monster.

“Why did you leave me alone?” she whispers, voice thick with pain. I’ve hurt her, in more ways than one. And that’s something I promised I’d never do. “I thought we were…”

“Nahla.”

“Stop saying my fucking name. Say something else. Tell me why you did it. Tell me what was more important to you. I don’t care that you got carried away. That night in the library… it was fucking perfect. I loved it. So please don’t say you did this for my sake.”

“Nothing is more important to me than you, Nahlani Mahelona. I cannot lose you.” I swallow past the lump forming in my throat.

Will she understand I must do it for her?

It’s there, on the tip of my tongue, the truth that will explain everything.

But I can’t find all the words. “I’d be lost without you.

Don’t you see? I’m…” I blow out a ragged breath. “Lost.”

Her expression softens. She places her hand flat on my chest, right over my throbbing heart. “Then talk to me, Aethan. Let me help you find your way. I’m tougher than you think.”

A smile tugs at my lips. “You’re a badass.”

Nahla’s laughter peels like a bell, brightening the entire room, and the pressure in my chest eases. “I know,” she says.

Her resistance fades. As she exhales, I feel a brush on my mind. Her emotions float to me, bathing me in her feelings of relief. Safety.

The lump in my throat hardens. “I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.”

She leans back, peering into my face with narrowed eyes. “You’re talking about locking me in my room, right? Not the fucking.”

“Right. Definitely not talking about fucking.” I let my gaze drop, drinking in the sight of her ample breasts. The perfect curve of her neck. Soft cheeks. The way her curls fall across her forehead. Those long, dark lashes. She’s so fucking beautiful. “Let me make it up to you.”

“Okay.” She blows the air from her cheeks. “But that’s a tall order. I’m picky.”

Goddess, this female.

She’s got me wrapped around her little finger. I know I fucked up. I hurt her, and I got scared—scared of how she’d react when she saw me again. Afraid she’d tell me to get lost. That she hated me. Hate, I could have handled. Nobody could hate me more than I hate myself.

I didn’t visit her because I was afraid if I opened the door, I’d find her room empty.

By some miracle, she’s still here. In my arms. Smiling. Making shit jokes. Nahla deserves the fucking world, and I’m going to give it to her.

She arches her back, dragging her nipples against my shirt. “So, how are you going to make it up to me, Aethan the Terrible?”

“I have an idea,” I say.

“Thunderous sex?”

“Likely.” I smile. “But I have something better in mind.”

“What’s better than sex?”

I tap her nose. “You’ll see.”