Page 14

Chapter Thirteen

Nora

I throw the ball to Fate, who runs like a mad dog to catch it, and I can’t help but laugh. Today is a good day—the pain only simmers beneath the surface, something I can easily push to the back of my mind. The cool autumn air brushes against my skin, reminding me of the peace in these small moments. But even now, the memory of Rafaele’s kiss presses at the edges of my thoughts, refusing to fade. It was more than I ever expected—so passionate, so hungry. But afterward, he was cool again, as if it had never happened.

Each time I look at him, I catch glimpses of that intensity, but it’s always gone before I can grasp it. He retreated into the cool, composed, and polite version of himself as if he hadn't unleashed that fiery intensity.

I crave to see that fire again, even though I fear what it might mean—because I know he respects me, maybe even desires me. But love? No. I don’t think he’s capable of love the way I need.

For the past three days, we’ve settled into a routine. He comes home earlier, joins me in the library, and we talk—about ordinary things. But his gaze lingers on me as though he’s waiting for something. What does he want? Should I take a step toward him, like he did in the car? I wish I knew.

Fate barks, breaking my trance, and I throw the ball again, watching her dash after it. Her energy is infectious, carefree in a way that I can’t seem to be lately. The question remains, persisting. What if I let myself fall? Could I handle the consequences?

I rub my hands together to dispel the chill, both from the wind and from the thoughts racing through my mind.

“Mrs. Lucchese, Ms. Lucia is here to see you. Are you available?”

I turn briskly, surprised but relieved to see Teresa standing at the back door. Relief washes over me at the idea of seeing Lucia.

“Yes, please!” I respond, perhaps too quickly, but anything to take my mind off the confusing whirlwind of emotions Rafaele has stirred up in me.

Teresa smiles and heads back inside, giving me a moment to collect my thoughts. As much as I’ve grown used to the grand estate, it still feels too large, too empty at times—especially when I’m left alone with my thoughts.

Lucia brings energy with her—a break from the quiet tension that has settled into this house. As I step inside, Lucia is already there, standing in the foyer with a wide grin on her face. It’s impossible not to feel lighter when she’s around.

I can’t help but laugh when I see her drop to her knees within seconds of noticing Fate.

“Oh my god, and who are you?” she coos, rubbing Fate’s belly as the little dog sprawls out on the floor, soaking up the attention. “You’re little Fate, aren’t you? How cute are you?”

I watch them for a moment, a soft smile playing on my lips. Lucia’s energy is infectious, and I hadn’t realized how much I needed her energy until now.

Finally, she looks up at me, her eyes twinkling with mischief. “I’m sorry. I promise I didn’t come just for her.” She stands, brushing her knees off with a grin.

“You also came for her,” I reply, still smiling. “Honestly, I’d think it was weird if you didn’t. Everyone’s in love with Fate—even Rafaele.” The words slip out before I can stop them, and my mind drifts back to him, always back to him.

Lucia arches an eyebrow, her smile turning sly. “Oh sure, Rafaele loves the dog,” she says, with a teasing tone that makes me blush a little. She sees right through me, and I’m not ready to face that.

I clear my throat, and she continues. “He mentioned that I could visit anytime, so I figured I’d take him up on the offer. I’ve always wanted to see this place. It’s… well, it’s a little less gothic and bloody than I expected, but it’ll do.”

I frown, surprised. “You’ve never been here before?”

She shrugs. “Nope. First time. Rafaele is not keen to have people in his space.”

“Well, then,” I say, eager to distract us both from the weight of Rafaele’s absence. “Let me give you the grand tour.”

As if on cue, Teresa pops her head in from the kitchen. “I’ll get some coffee and cookies ready for you both in the library,” she says, already bustling back into the pantry before we can protest.

“This woman is a treasure,” I tell Lucia, who nods in agreement, her eyes twinkling.

“She really is,” she agrees, glancing toward the pantry where Teresa disappeared. “You’re lucky to have her.”

The estate’s grandeur can feel cold, but with people like Teresa and a dog like Fate, it’s starting to feel less like a fortress and more like a home.

Lucia hooks her arm through mine. “Now, come on. Let’s start that tour. I want to see the infamous Lucchese estate. Maybe I’ll find some secret torture chamber or something.”

I chuckle, shaking my head. “Sorry to disappoint, but no hidden dungeons—at least, not that I’ve found.”

We walk through the grand hall, the house somehow feeling less intimidating with her beside me, her curious eyes taking in every detail. The heavy atmosphere of the house seems to lift a little with Lucia’s presence. As I guide her through the rooms, I realize I’m relaxing more than I have in days, letting her energy lift the weight of Rafaele’s kiss and the swirling doubts it brought.

“This place is amazing,” Lucia says, pausing in front of one of the oil paintings. “I mean, it’s no wonder Rafaele never brings people over. It’s like… too personal, you know?”

I blink, surprised by her insight. She’s right. Everything about this house is so carefully curated, so guarded. It’s just like him.

“I never thought of it that way.”

She looks at me, her expression softening. “He’s more guarded than anyone realizes, I think. But then, I’m sure you’re figuring that out.” She nudges me gently. “You look different, you know.”

“Different, how?” I ask, curiosity piqued.

She shrugs, her gaze playful but sincere. “Lighter. Maybe you’re starting to make this place your own.”

I smile, though her words tug at something deep inside me. Could I really be finding a place here? Or was I just convincing myself that I belonged in Rafaele’s world?

We reach the library, and Fate scampers off to explore while Teresa appears with a tray of coffee and cookies.

"Let’s sit,” Lucia says, tugging me toward the sofa with a playful smile. “And you can tell me all about what it’s like living with the great Rafaele Lucchese.”

I laugh, though part of me feels heavy. How do I explain a man like Rafaele? Even I’m not sure I understand him yet.

“You’re going to be sorely disappointed if you’re expecting any excitement. We mostly spend time here reading.”

She pours herself a cup of coffee, tilting her head slightly. “Rafaele isn’t comfortable with most people. They either bore or irritate him. I’m a bit of an exception—he finds me more amusing than annoying. But sharing not only his home but his quiet moments with you? That’s not a small thing.”

Her words hang in the air, and I realize just how intimate these quiet moments with Rafaele have become.

I let out a sigh, grabbing a cookie from the plate between us. “I don’t know with him anymore. He’s all hot and cold.”

She raises her eyebrows, a teasing smile playing at her lips. “You are probably the first person in history to describe Rafaele Lucchese as ‘hot’ about anything.”

The humor is a welcome relief from the tension, but there’s truth in what she says.

I feel the blush creep up my cheeks. “Why aren’t you afraid of him?” I blurt out, realizing too late how blunt it sounds.

She lets out a startled laugh. “What?”

I stammer, feeling my face flush even more. “It’s just… Rafaele is more than just his reputation—we both know that. But everyone I know is either scared or at least wary of him, and you… you seem to look at him like he’s a puppy.”

“Oh.” She leans back in her seat, her smile softening. “Don’t get me wrong. I know he’s not a puppy. I’m very aware my cousin is a dangerous man. But he lives by a code—trust. His rules are stringent, but they all come back to that one thing. If you’re loyal to him, he’ll be your fiercest ally. It’s not fear—it’s respect.”

I nod, but something shifts in her eyes, the carefree light dimming just a little.

“You don’t have to say more,” I murmur, sensing the weight behind her words.

“No, actually, I think I do. We’re friends now, aren’t we? And a little trust goes a long way.” She takes a sip of coffee, staring off as if gathering her thoughts. “You know, for most men in our world, women are just… transactions. Of course, you know that—you’ve just been auctioned off to the Lucchese.”

I wince at her bluntness, but she continues with a wave of her hand. “We don’t hold much value except as a means to an end. But Rafaele—he’s different. He doesn’t see women that way. He’s… well, ahead of his time, I guess you could say.”

She takes a deep breath, her smile fading. “A few years ago, a powerful man wanted me. Whether I was willing or not didn’t matter. He took what he wanted.”

The reality of her words hits me, and I feel my heart clench with pain for her. “Lucia, I?—”

She cuts me off with a small smile, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. “It’s okay. It was a long time ago. But I was supposed to marry him afterward, of course. That was the plan—tie me to him forever. My father was all for it. But Rafaele… Rafaele was the only one who came to me and asked what really happened. He was the only one who cared.”

I swallow hard, the image of the cold, ruthless man I’ve known for such a short time suddenly shifting in my mind. Rafaele, who everyone fears, who I’m starting to see in a different light, was the only one who stood by her.

“And you told him everything?” I ask softly.

“I did,” she says, her voice barely above a whisper. “And Rafaele made sure that man never touched me again. He put an end to it. For good.”

My breath catches in my throat, and suddenly, everything feels heavier. I’ve heard the stories, I’ve seen the fear people hold for him, but hearing this? It’s something different. Something more.

“Rafaele has a heart, Nora,” Lucia says gently as if reading my thoughts. “It’s buried deep, and not many people get to see it, but it’s there. And if he’s opening up to you, even just a little? That’s not something you should take lightly.”

I bite my lip, hesitating for a moment. But this is Lucia, and something about her feels so safe, so easy to talk to. I don’t know why, but I feel the pull to share what’s been in the back of my mind since that kiss in the car.

“Rafaele kissed me,” I admit, my voice barely above a whisper.

Her eyes widen, and for a second, she’s completely still. Then, a grin breaks across her face, and she practically squeals, her excitement bubbling over. “Oh my god! He kissed you?! That’s huge!”

I blush, not expecting such an enthusiastic reaction. “It was… it was intense,” I murmur, the memory of his lips against mine sending a shiver down my spine.

She grabs my hands, pulling me closer. “Nora, this is way bigger than you think. You don’t understand—Rafaele doesn’t just kiss people. He doesn’t go for physical contact. Ever.”

I blink, my mind racing. “He doesn’t?” Her words make me pause. I thought maybe the kiss was just in the moment, but now, I’m not so sure.

“I thought… I don’t know. I thought maybe it was just in the moment,” I confess, my voice trembling slightly. “But now I don’t know what to think.”

She squeezes my hands, her eyes softening. “You know as well as I do that he’s all about control. I’ve known him my whole life, and trust me, he’s never been the touchy-feely type. It’s just not who he is. So for him to kiss you? That’s a big deal. Like, a huge deal. He doesn’t slip like that easily. I think he cares about you more than he's willing to admit. He’s probably just scared to show it. That’s who Rafaele is. He hides behind all that coldness, but when he feels something? He feels it deeply.”

I nod, even as doubt gnaws at me. Maybe she’s right. Maybe he feels something. But I can’t let myself fall for him.

“We’ll see,” I reply evasively, eager to change the subject. “How are things with you these days?”

Lucia smirks, clearly aware of my deflection. “I’m doing good. Still annoying everyone, as per usual.” She grins, her eyes lighting up with mischief. “I was thinking, maybe we could have a girls' day out? What do you think? Get out of the house, do something fun?”

Her suggestion brings a smile to my face, and I find myself nodding. “That sounds like a great idea.”

“Good! I’ll text you the details. Maybe shopping, a nice lunch, something to take your mind off certain tall, brooding husbands?” She winks, and I laugh despite myself.

“Yes, and come visit whenever you want. I enjoy your company.”

“Same. It’s so refreshing to be with you instead of the stuck-up housewives who make criticizing me a national sport.”

“Urgh, I know. This is the reason why I always stayed back.”

Before long, she’s leaving, but with a promise to come see me again soon, and I’m once again left alone with my thoughts.

And as I sit there, the memory of Rafaele’s kiss presses in again, floating at the edges of my thoughts. Maybe Lucia’s right. Perhaps I’ve been holding back out of fear. What for? What am I so scared of? I should be able to guard my heart, right? A lot of people do it. Being intimate or physical with a man doesn’t mean you have to love him. It can’t be that hard.

I just can’t ignore the nagging truth—Rafaele’s kiss has opened a door, and whether I’m ready or not, I know I’ll have to walk through it.