Page 18 of Of Ash and Iron (Flame Cursed Fae #3)

Chapter 18

Maddy

W hen I show up at magic practice, two hours later, I have a plan to teach the high and mighty Brynhild a lesson.

She humiliated me in front of the other ice-fae when I arrived here, and now, immature as it is, I want to embarrass her.

The correct thing to do would be to go to her before magic practice and show her that I'm now able to access all the powers and skills we talked about a few days ago.

But I'm not going to do that, and I don't care how petty that makes me. She deserves to be knocked down a peg or two.

So I line up with other rooks outside the Bird Wing, making sure Thyrvi is still lumbering around in the foliage beyond, finding herself some breakfast.

"Hi," Martom says to me as I stand beside him. He looks sincere enough, so I smile at him.

"Hi."

"Are you rejoining us now?"

"Yup."

"Have you got control of your magic, then?" Erika asks, leaning forward.

"Yup."

Brynhild strides out the main door to the Bird Wing, and falters slightly when she sees me. "Madivia?" It's a clear question, but I treat it as an acknowledgement.

" Hersir ," I say, nodding.

"You are… joining us today?"

"I am. You told me that 'if the innate magic is not there, then you cannot be taught.' Well, my innate magic is present."

"It is?"

"I can do every single thing on that list you gave me."

Brynhild stares at me. She's not looking at me like I'm lying—she knows I wouldn't make such a bold claim if it were untrue.

I'm waiting for her to tell me to prove it, but she asks something else instead. "What changed?"

I pause. Do I avoid conflict and be generally contrite and evasive? Or do I tell her that all of her "advice" was totally wrong for me, and the way she treated me was cruel and did nothing but hold me back?

Unable to make the decision, I instead call one word. "Thyrvi!"

There's a long, tense silence, then the crashing of undergrowth behind us. The other rooks turn, and I hear gasps as my huge, beautiful white bear bounds into the clearing. The others scatter as she lumbers to a stop beside me, and I look at Brynhild.

I've never seen the look that is currently on her face.

She's staring open-mouthed at Thyrvi, and for the first time I can see an actual smile tugging at her mouth. I'm almost sure there's wonder in her eyes.

Thyrvi moves slowly toward the Valkyrie and leans her head down to sniff the ice-fae. Her wings flutter out, and Thyrvi jumps in surprise.

"You… you can keep her here now?" Brynhild keeps her eyes fixed on the bear when she speaks to me, carefully lifting an outstretched hand toward her. There's a shimmer of light, and I see her bird appear.

Wariness engulfs me. Can her bird read information from Thyrvi?

"Yes, hersir ," I say, and my tone fails to hide my wariness.

Brynhild turns, and I only just take my eyes from her bird in time. "How?"

I make my decision.

"I let her in. I stopped trying to concentrate. I stopped trying to clear my mind, or focus on one thing. I stopped doing everything you told me to do, and I let my instincts and emotion take over, and now…"

I hold my hand up, creating an arc of ice shards just like she did. Instead of making them form a tiny Frost Giant, I have them merge as a small but mighty bear, which spins in the air before landing on my hand.

Thyrvi swings her head around to peer at the little ice bear.

Martom whispers, "I want to do that!"

"Pathetically sized, but visually appealing," Thyrvi says to me.

"Thanks," I tell her.

Brynhild's bird is flying in increasingly fast circles around her, and it's hard not to look at her. "Fascinating," the Valkyrie says eventually.

Fascinating ? That's all she has to say? How about sorry , or I was wrong ?

I'm unable to stop my glare, and I'm rewarded with the tiniest flinch of regret in her eyes.

It's not what I wanted, but it might be enough. She knows she was wrong, even if she'll never admit it aloud.

I set the ice bear down on the ground, where Thyrvi noses it. On contact with the bear's black snout, it instantly melts.

"How do you do that?" It's Martom again, and when I turn to him, he's pink in the face and bouncing on his heels.

"I just will it," I say with a shrug. "Like I think about eating or breathing, or anything natural. It just… happens."

"You… you don't clear your mind and find your power first?"

I shake my head.

Martom closes his eyes and holds out his hand, and ice whirls above his palm. Nothing happens. "It's not working."

Brynhild clears her throat, and we all look at her. "Madivia's way of accessing magic is not the way most of you will succeed," she says.

Indignation swells in me that she's trying to justify how she treated me. But as I form arguments in my head, I realize slowly that she's right.

That's kind of the point I've just learned and accepted. I don't work like everyone else.

You're the weirdo, Maddy, remember?

The only one.

The loner.

I make a conscious effort not to touch the brand on my arm.

"But," Brynhild continues, "if there is another way to perform such feats with ice magic that I have been previously unaware of, then we should explore it."

My lips part slowly. This is not what I thought she would say.

She looks directly at me, and there is no challenge or sarcasm in her face, or her voice, when she speaks. "Tell us, Madivia. Describe how it feels to be connected with your val-tivar —Thyrvi, is it?"

I nod mutely.

"And tell us how you use your new magic with such incredible control. Be detailed. Anything you say may help another here."

Again, I search her tone, her eyes, even her body language for any sign of contempt, for any sign that she is setting me up to fail. But she's sincere. I'm sure of it.

So, I take a breath, look at the others, and do as she asked.

By the end of the day, it's clear that what I'm doing is not going to work for everyone. Martom swears that he feels he has more control by leaning into his instincts, but I'm not convinced. As we are starting to walk away from the Bird Wing, though, Erika gives a yelp, and we all freeze.

"I saw an eagle!" she squeaks, her eyes fixed above her head.

Thyrvi speaks in my mind. "A large gray one," she confirms.

"Your val-tivar ?" everyone asks in unison.

She's beaming as she nods.

At dinner that evening, three more rooks are talking about seeing signs of their val-tivars . The room is filled with chatter, and it only takes a short while before rooks are coming over to me, Martom's enthusiastic retelling of my bear's appearance at magic practice spreading quickly.

"Is it true you're not concentrating to use your magic?"

"How did you get your bear to stay here all the time?"

"Why did you need the bear to get your magic?"

"Does she really talk to you?"

"Can we see her?"

The questions are endless, and eventually I just take them all outside to see Thyrvi.

I'm nervous about being the center of attention, but the pride I feel when I watch over twenty faces stare in awe at the colossal white bear is one of the best feelings of my life.

Most of them saw her on the frozen spring, but now they are close to her, and seeing her standing by my side, it's a different feeling altogether. It's pride making me swell, not fear or rage.

Thyrvi is loving it too, pawing the ground, swinging her huge head, and occasionally baring her teeth for no reason whatsoever.

"Your enemies do not come to admire me," she says in my head.

She's right. Of the group, only Ulrika is here, the first time I've seen her in such a public place since her punishment. She's looking at Thyrvi from the very back of the group with a hint of genuine fear on her face. I'm not surprised, given what she saw my bear do in the glade. What she nearly did to Inga.

But Inga and Orgid, along with Dimec and Thira, didn't show up for dinner. I regret that they are not here to see this. Both them and I know that Inga's bear is a match for Thyrvi—enough that two on one they can still get to me. But I beat them. Injured.

And Inga may have made contact with her bear, but I'm the first to get control.

My eyes instinctively seek out Kain.

He's leaning against the side of the feasting hall, watching. There's a glint in his eye, and I'm almost sure that he's enjoying my moment too.

I've wanted to talk to him all day, but I don't trust myself not to say something I can't take back.

He's the reason Thyrvi is standing beside me right now. I wouldn't have control if it weren't for him.

But I shouldn't say that to him. I shouldn't connect him with all this power and excitement; it'll only make my fascination with him worse.

I force my eyes away from him, but it's not so easy with my thoughts.

Who in Odin's name am I kidding?

Kain is the reason for all this power and excitement, and trying to ignore the connection is impossible.

I don't have a fascination with Kain.

I have an obsession.

I was learning to live with my physical infatuation with the fire-fae, but now… This has gone so much further than the physical.

What happened in the glade was enough to make me realize that he has a dangerous hold over me. It was enough to confirm that all self-control abandons me completely, and that the desires of my own body are astonishingly powerful on their own.

But what happened yesterday in the healing room…

That has changed everything, irrevocably.