Page 28 of Obsession (Warriors of the Drexian Academy #4)

Chapter

Twenty-Eight

Kann

T he forest pressed close around us, as we made our way through the ancient grounds of the academy. Even knowing this was all a simulation couldn't diminish the visceral reality of it—the loamy scent of decaying leaves beneath our feet, the way shafts of shimmering sunlight pierced the canopy to create shifting patterns on the forest floor, the constant rustle of small creatures darting through the underbrush. If I wasn’t worried the thing would kill us, I’d be even more impressed by the simulation.

I should have been focused entirely on watching for hunters or scanning for traps. The Silent Hunt had been notorious for its ruthlessness, and my time in the program had not changed that opinion. But my mind kept circling back to that kiss in the cave, to the way Britta had stiffened in surprise when I'd first pressed my lips to hers, then melted against me, her fingers curling into the fabric of my uniform as she'd deepened the kiss.

It should not have happened. I knew that, and I knew all the reasons I never should have given into the temptation of her soft lips and pleading eyes. But I had never been known for my restraint. Was any Blade?

I tried to use my Blade training to home in on the sounds and smells around me, but my mind kept taking me back to the cavern. The memory of her soft skin, breathy sigh, sweet taste was imprinted on me and was all I could think about. Every sound was her hungry sigh, every scent was the sweet smell of her hair, everything that touched me was as petal-soft as her lips.

Grekking hell. I gritted out a rough grunt of disgust at myself.

Focus, before you get us both killed.

The thought of Britta being in danger doused my treacherous thoughts. I had to think of anything but her if I wanted to save us both.

I glanced back at the human whose hand I was still holding, as I led her through the forest. Her face was pinched with worry, and her eyes were on the ground as she stepped carefully where I stepped. She hadn't spoken of it since we'd left the cave. Was she angry? Shocked? Offended? The questions tumbled through my mind, each worse than the last.

I had not asked to kiss her, even though everything about the way she’d looked at me had told me yes. Which I knew was no excuse and no defense. I’d crossed a line I'd sworn never to cross, let impulse override so much carefully maintained control.

A branch snapped beneath my boot, and I winced at the sound, though the crack wasn't nearly as loud as the thundering of my own heart. I paused, stopping our progress to listen for any hint of pursuing Drexians. Nothing. Only the chirping, rustling, scuttling of the woods around us.

"I'm sorry," I blurted out, the words escaping before I could stop them.

She waited several beats to respond. “Why are you sorry?"

I pivoted to face her. "For kissing you." The moment the words left my mouth, I saw something flicker across her face—hurt?

I ran a hand through my hair in frustration. This was not going well, although I had not thought it through, so what did I expect? “I’m not sorry I kissed you. I'm sorry I did it without asking. I should have—”

"That's okay." She cut me off, then looked down at her boots. "If you'd asked..." She took a breath, then continued in barely more than a whisper, "If you'd asked, I might have felt like I had to say no."

My breath caught in my throat. "Did you not want me to kiss you?"

She kept her gaze on the tangle of leaves and vines covering the ground. "I know I shouldn't have wanted you to kiss me.” Her eyes lifted to meet mine, filled with a mix of defiance and vulnerability that made my chest ache. "But knowing I shouldn't want something doesn't stop me from wanting it."

Heat coiled in my belly as her words sank in. She wanted me. Britta—brilliant, beautiful, absolutely forbidden Britta—wanted me. I should have told her it was impossible. Should have maintained professional distance. Should have done anything except stand there imagining how easy it would be to pull her close and kiss her again.

Her confession broke something inside me. I could not keep the truth from her for one moment longer.

“I hated teaching you to flirt.”

Her eyes flared wide. “You did? But you offered. I didn’t even ask, you said you wanted to—”

“I know what I said.” I huffed out a breath. “I don’t know why I did that. Maybe to get closer to you, to spend time with you, to have an excuse to be around you. But I knew it was a mistake almost as soon as I offered.”

She just blinked at me.

“Every time you practiced the walk I taught you or you tried to toss your hair —" I broke off, shocked by the intensity of jealousy that surged through me at just the thought. “I hated the idea of you using them on Zav. On anyone, actually.”

"You were jealous? But…but you can get anyone you want.” She shook her head as if rejecting what I was telling her. “From what I’ve heard, you have gotten anyone you’ve wanted.”

I shrugged, cutting off whatever rumors she'd heard. "None of them were you."

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

There had been so many reasons, and I suspected she knew them all. “Why do you think?”

Her shoulders sagged. “We can’t happen. You’re an instructor, and I’m a cadet.”

Before I could nod, she turned and walked ahead, her movements slightly unsteady. I watched her move through a patch of dappled sunlight, the golden rays catching in her hair, and something inside me broke. To hell with propriety. To hell with regulations. I no longer cared about any of it. I only cared about her. But was she willing to risk everything the way I suddenly was?

I started after her. "Britta—"

As I caught up to her and she started to twist toward me, the ground beneath her feet crumbled.

One moment she was there, the next she was dropping into darkness, one arm flying up as she fell. I lunged forward, reaching desperately for her outstretched hand. Time seemed to slow as my fingers stretched toward hers, knowing that if I missed, if I couldn't catch her, if she got trapped in a pit and we couldn’t get to the academy—

I wasn’t sure of all the technicalities of holotechnology and what was happening to the simulation, but I had a horrible feeling that none of what we’d been discussing, none of what I’d been agonizing over, none of the risk I was willing to take would matter if I couldn't reach her in time.