Page 123 of November
“Come in,” she replied.
Maisie walked in, closed the door behind her, and said, “I’m sorry.”
“I’m sorry,” India said at the same time.
Then, they both laughed for a moment.
“Glad we got that out of the way,” India added. “You know, we could not drink any of this tonight and just have coffee, water, or tea. I have tea.”
“I made sure to buy the most expensive red wine in the liquor store,” Maisie noted.
“It’s a good red,” she replied, glancing down at the label. “And I appreciate the gesture, but it’s late, and you’re sleeping over, so…”
“So, you don’t want me to snore again?” Maisie teased, glaring at her playfully as she dropped her backpack to the floor. “I see.”
India laughed and asked, “Coffee? I have decaf.”
“Sure,” Maisie said with a little laugh, and they headed to the kitchen.
“Do you want to drop that in the bedroom?” India asked, referring to Maisie’s bag.
“Sure.”
India went about making two decaf drinks: a cappuccino for herself and a caramel latte for Maisie. By the time she was done, though, she turned to see that Maisie still wasn’t back from the bedroom, so she carried their coffeesdown the hall and found her just leaving the master bathroom.
“I just wanted to set my toiletries on the counter. I hope that’s okay.”
“Of course,” India said. “Here’s your coffee.”
“Thanks,” Maisie replied.
India handed it to her, and they stood there awkwardly as if they’d just met and had no idea what to say to each other. India was about to begin rambling about the weather when Maisie sipped her coffee and smiled.
“Caramel,” she said.
“That’s your drink, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Maisie, I really am sorry.”
“You didn’t actually do anything wrong. But so am I,” Maisie told her.
India set her own cup on her bedside table and lay on the bed, leaning back against her pillows. Maisie appeared not to know what to do, so she held her cup in her hands but sat down next to India, facing the bathroom door.
“I think I needed to walk away today just to have some time to process what I was feeling. Sometimes, it’s hard for me to know what’s going on inside my head right away, but I’ll walk through it or be at the bookshop, and somehow, it comes to me. I’ve been alone for a while now. I love Lainey, but when we were together, I never really felt like I could talk to her. I think that’s more about me than it is her. Now that we’re friends, I don’t feel that way very often, but outside of her, I’ve had very few relationships. I had a girlfriend for a few months when we were in college, but she wasn’t from here and didn’t plan on sticking around, and I–”
“You had the bookshop,” India said.
Maisie nodded and added, “And I love it here. I don’t want to ever leave this city. Vacations? Sure. But living somewhere else is not for me. It’s hard to explain to people sometimes, the gravity of having something likeChapter & Versethat represents your family’s work. Everything else is gone: all the other land they owned, the farms, the other businesses,the people. It’s just me and this place still here, and I think I’ve been so focused on protecting that.” Maisie sighed. “I’ve not really let anyone else in. I can’t promise that I’ll always letyouin, but I wanted you to know that I’m going to work on that and that it’s not about you. I feel like Icantalk to you.”
“You just don’t need me to fix everything for you,” India said, nodding in understanding.
“But it doesn’t mean that I can’t talk to you. It doesn’t mean that we can’t figure things out together. I think I get this stubbornness from Grams.” Maisie laughed. “Sometimes, it feels like there’s this major hill I need to climb just to be able to tell someone something important; something that might hurt me, depending on how they react or respond. It takes me a while to climb that hill, but other people don’t have a hill at all. They have this, like, field or something in front of them, so they can just run right up to someone and tell them all their deepest, darkest secrets.”
“I get it,” India replied. “I don’t know that I have a field or a massive hill, but maybe something in between. For years, though, I think I got rather used to getting my own way and not needing to reveal much. Finley let me.”
“I don’t,” Maisie said with a smile.
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