Page 52 of Not Her Day to Die (Star-Crossed #2)

G et up. They’re going to be here soon. The words echo around us. You need to get up. Don’t let them find you there.

Breaking apart from Veronica, I look around. Trying to find the source of the voice.

Get up! Now!

Jerking to my feet, I grab Veronica and haul her with me back to Darius’s truck.

“We have to get dry.” Casting my attention around the area, I don’t see anyone else. But the voice was as if it were spoken into my ear.

As soon as we are in Darius’s truck, I hear the sirens.

My breathing comes out in heavy broken pants and then there are four cop cars pulling up to Maxwell’s vehicle.

From where I am parked, they can’t see us, but even still, I lower further in the seat. “Veronica, I don’t think they should know we were there.”

That’s correct. Stay out of trouble. Then you will be done with this. All of this. This time, when the voice wraps around me, I am able to recognize where it is coming from.

Me.

Except it’s not me. I chalk it up to another part of dying over and over again.

Veronica is silent as she lowers down, hiding in the truck with me .

“Veronica, I’m sorry.”

She breathes in and out a few times but doesn’t reply. She stares blankly out the window in a nearly catatonic state.

Even as hypocritical as it is, I want to shake her out of it, but then my phone chimes loudly, causing me to jump and my head to hit the steering wheel.

Grabbing hold of it, I answer. “I’m okay,” I say. “I’m with Veronica, I’ll meet you at home.” Disconnecting the call before Axel can lay into me or pepper me with questions I don’t want to answer, I shift back up to my seat and turn the truck on.

Veronica doesn’t get up from the floorboard, and I don’t make her.

Putting it in drive, I keep the lights off as I turn around.

Away from the cops, hidden by the bend and the thick onslaught of rain.

The thunder drowning out Darius’s raucous truck.

The storm is still ramping up all around us, a match to the mood in the vehicle, and I drive extra carefully, maneuvering through it towards my home.

The O’Brien’s house.

***

It isn’t but ten minutes after we have made it inside the house that the front door is slammed open. I have found towels for Veronica and I and we are in the process of drying off when Axel marches his way up to me. He lifts me clean off the ground and forces me to wrap my legs around his waist.

“Never again!” he bites out. And then he is pressing his harsh lips to mine. Enveloping me in his leather scent, mixed with the fresh rain. He is soaking wet, but I ignore it as he fills me with his anger, his worry, his love .

Tugging apart from Axel, I stare into his eyes. “I’m sorry, I didn’t have a choice, but I tried to call you. All of you,” I insist.

Axel heaves a sigh, casting his attention to Veronica. “The police station took our phones and threw us in a locked room. Thank fuck you returned Luna’s call or I would have lost my damn mind if I were in there a moment longer. Fuck, you’re really okay.”

“Maxwell and my brother are dead,” Veronica states evenly, descending to the couch.

I wrestle out of Axel’s arms, but then Darius is there tugging me into his. He offers me a tight hug and a peck before Grayson takes hold of me next. He cradles me to him, apologizing relentlessly under his breath.

“It’s not your fault.” I squeeze him to me tight before releasing him too. My men and I will have our time to tumble into each other’s arms, for me to fall apart. But right now, Veronica needs me.

Spinning away from the brothers, I land onto the couch next to Veronica, this time I don’t break into a mess of sobs when I wrap her back in my arms.

“I’m sorry,” I say.

“If William would have just taken us to you at the estate. If he would have just listened to me!” She is shaking.

“I should have let them know.” Darius is the one who speaks, and I whip my attention to him in confusion.

Angling my head, I watch as guilt settles around him; it is a weight that draws down on his face and body.

“William was supposed to take me to you, back at the Thornes, but then I knew something wasn’t right and I bolted.

I should have told you sooner. I planned to but then everything happened so fast here and I wanted you to have just a few days of happiness before having to deal with it.

” The words whoosh from Darius’s mouth, an unbroken chain of remorse .

“No, you did the right thing,” Veronica murmurs against my shirt, squeezing me tighter. I can feel how close she is to falling apart, it is in the way her fingers curl into my skin, as if I am the only thing keeping her here.

Mulling over Darius’s confession I decide I’m not angry or upset, I understand where he was coming from.

I attempt to portray that with my eyes as Veronica’s sobs intensify, as my shirt grows wet.

“My idiot fucking brother! He went through so much, for me. And then he had to go and die. And leave me behind,” Veronica exclaims.

Her words hit close to home.

Tripp and Auggie. I miss them more than I can even put into words. My guilt and grief will most likely always be unwelcome companions in my life. But I am also angry with them.

Angry they went off on their own and got themselves killed.

Angry and grateful.

Grateful that they kept me from befalling the same fate as so many others in this town.

“Where’s your mom?” I ask.

“She left town when we were young, she tried to take us with her, but our dad wouldn’t let her. Oh god, I need to call her. Tell her what happened.” Veronica is falling apart in my arms.

And I let her.

I feel the presence of Grayson as he walks behind the couch, standing guard behind us. Of Axel as he settles onto the arm of it, Darius as he takes up place at my feet.

I feed from what they provide.

Darius’s serenity. It is a welcome sanctuary after this brutal storm.

Axel’s chaos. It makes me realize it’s okay to not be okay .

Grayson’s power. It helps me to stand on my own feet when I can’t do it alone.

They are the pillars that have allowed me to exist without completely dissolving into a puddle of disgusting mush.

They are all silent, allowing this moment between Veronica and me.

And that is where she and I stay for hours.

After a while, she unlatches herself from me, and then she tells me about William.

How he was always looking out for her; he was so guilt-ridden by everything in this town, but he didn’t have a choice.

He eventually confessed to her that he knew what they were going to do to Tripp and Auggie.

She tells me how he never forgave himself…

how it ate him alive...that maybe, somehow , this was his way of making up for it. He sacrificed himself for her. For us.

William was still so young, but forced to make impossible decisions. And even through it all, I could recognize he tried to keep me safe too, at least to the best of his abilities.

And I tell her that. How he warned me away from the Thornes, how he never hurt me, how when he came to me in that disgusting underground prison, he was the reason I was able to escape.

William wasn’t perfect, but he didn’t deserve to die.

She ignores the men, gushing to me of her past, of memories of her brother, and I offer the same.

And then we move on to Carrie, on how she died, onto Julia and how long she must have been forced to endure alone to only then be cruelly shot. My heart breaks for my friends all over again.

They were taken too soon.

Then we move onto our parents and how it must be to live in a town so encapsulated with evil that they never truly had any choices either .

For hours we go back and forth, exchanging stories, igniting our anger, and eventually the brothers join in. Telling their own tales of Tripp and Auggie’s shenanigans, of fond memories together.

Eventually the conversation turns darker, of how this all came to be. Of how it was under everyone’s noses but nobody came forward.

They couldn’t.

The room is heavy, filled with a barrage of pain and happiness.

Of the weight of those who we have lost, of the memories of their lives.

It’s late, well past midnight, and I am exhausted—I imagine we all are—but that does not stop us.

We are grieving together, we are allowing ourselves to feel, to acknowledge, to tip-toe forward.

And the longer we talk, the closer we shift together, our voices lowering to near whispers.

As if we are a group of huddled children expelling our deepest secrets to our safest friends.

By the time we are finished talking, we are all yawning, but I am much lighter. Part of myself is healing, moving on, accepting that this world is horrible and also beautiful.

That I might not ever truly understand it all.

At the very end of it, I whisper, “I killed Mark.”

The confession is different in this open space, as if it has more room to spread and evolve.

“Good,” Veronica says, reaching out and squeezing my hand. “He was the worst of them all.”

“She’s right. If you hadn’t, I would have,” Axel confirms, wrapping an arm over my shoulders.

Grayson grunts his agreement.

Darius brushes the tears from my eyes.

After a few more beats of silence Veronica asks, “Is it okay if I stay here with you tonight? ”

I don’t confirm with the brothers. I know they want time with just me, but I need to be with Veronica. Be here for her. I don’t want her to feel alone right now. I know that in the middle of the night is when her grief will hit the hardest. “Please.”

It isn’t much longer before I guide her to my room and offer her a change of clothes. When we get into the bed together, I squeeze her to my side and she continues on from before. But this time our conversation is hushed, whispers of dreams and hopes, and questions of why this happened to us.

A part of me wants to tell her about the loops, about my own survivors’ guilt, but I don’t. It would be selfish.

For their part, the brothers don’t invade our space, but I can hear them all outside the door.

“All of them?” Veronica asks on the cusp of sleep. “If only Auggie could see you now.” She laughs around a big yawn.

“Isn’t it weird? You don’t think Tripp and Auggie would hate me for this, do you?”

Veronica’s eyes flutter shut. “No, both of those boys wanted you to be happy. Hell they even joked about you being with the other brothers more times than I can count. Maybe they knew they didn’t have much longer and wanted to set you up for your own happiness.

Or maybe they were just—” A yawn cuts her off.

“Thank you, Sunday. For being here, for everything. I love you.”

“I love you too.” And I do. Veronica is someone who has risked herself time and time again and again for others. She is selfless. She is sweet and kind. She is strong. And I know that no matter what happens, she will always hold a place in my heart. I will always consider her family.

Soft snores break through my thoughts, and it isn’t but a second later that I hear the door open and close.

“Axel,” I warn .

“It’s me.”

Rolling carefully over, I find Grayson’s eyes watching me.

“Grayson?”

He leans down, gently brushing my hair back, before pressing his lips tenderly to mine.

Even outside of the restaurant, away from the water, the smell of the marina carries with him.

The salt and diesel swirling hypnotically.

He is trapping me in this moment with him, keeping my full attention, as his pillowed lips move against mine.

My heartbeat ramps up, my previous calm replaced by a frenzy of energy.

He separates, pressing his cool forehead to mine. “I won’t stay in here, I will give you two space. I’m making Darius and Axel get some sleep, God knows they need it. But I will be right outside. And I won’t go anywhere.”

I have my doubts that either Darius or Axel will listen to him, but I don’t argue. “Are you okay? What about your mother?”

Grayson gently pulls back. “We didn’t see her, but it sounds like she’s going to be placed in a mental health facility.

That’s the direction her defense will push at least. Maybe one day in the future I will go see her, but…

” He rakes a hand through his hair, standing back up to his full height.

“I don’t think she will ever be a part of our lives again.

It’s just the three of us now.” He smiles down at me. “The four of us.”

“What about…” I turn my head to make sure Veronica is still asleep. “What about my parents? The blackmail. Will they be able to come home now?” I’m not sure if I want them to.

“I called them earlier. Let them know that Sterling is dead. They’re coming back. They love and care about you, Sunday. They checked in with me nearly every day about you. They were just scared to contact you directly. Afraid it would mean putting you in the Thornes cross-fire.”

My stomach twists up into a painful cluster of knots. I don’t know how I feel about my parents .

But I need to speak to them.

“Get some sleep. I’ll be right outside if you need me.” Grayson’s lips brush my forehead before he walks silently out of the room, quietly shutting the door.

I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep, but it isn’t but a few beats later that my eyelids grow heavy, my breathing evens, and the weight of the day catches up with me.