Page 54

KLAUS

T he image of Emma dancing with another man plays in my head on a loop.

I want to scream at her. I want to confront her and ask her how she could do this to me. I want to ask her why she let me down like this.

But instead, I retreat inside myself.

Alaric sits across from me. I told him he didn't have to come over, but he invited himself over anyway. I'm not going to lie, having him here helps a little. With him around, it no longer feels like the world is going to end.

"What the hell am I going to do now?" I ask, flipping the ring box open. I can't believe I thought she was the one for me.

"Okay, this will probably backfire, but I'm going to throw something out there," he says. "Do you think it's possible that you might be overreacting?"

"Are you kidding me?" I ask. "You were the one who told me the truth about her. You were right all along."

He looks at me with sad eyes. "I usually take joy in being right, but this isn't one of those times. I never wanted it to end like this."

"I saw her dancing with another man," I say. "Who knows what else she would have done if I hadn't stepped in?"

"The two of you had a whirlwind romance," he says. "I don't think you even had a chance to speak about things like being exclusive to each other."

"It was implied," I say.

"Maybe for you," he says. "Because believe it or not, people can't read your mind, Klaus."

"It was fucking implied, man," I say. "I knew it, and she knew it."

"Fine." He clears his throat. "There's one more thing I need to tell you."

"I don't know if I can handle any more, Alaric," I say.

"I told you that Emma took a client at Elysium," he says. "I just found out tonight that the client was you. She was the girl who came up to your room that one time. It was the first time she was anything more than a cocktail waitress at the club."

"I know."

"You knew ?" he asks.

"I didn't realize it until tonight," I say."She was wearing a mask at the time, so I didn't recognize her. I wish I had. I would've known then that it was all about the money to her. She's just another girl who tried to play me."

I feel hollow inside as I say the words out loud. I'm trying to switch the pain to anger, but I just feel so numb inside. I really thought what we had was something special.

And if I'm being honest, a big part of me still hopes this is all just abad dream.

"I still think you should talk to her about it," he says.

"What's the point?" I say. "There's nothing left to salvage in this relationship."

Every time I close my eyes, I see her dancing with that man. I can't erase the image from my head.

"Don't you want to hear her side of the story?" he asks.

"Not one bit," I say. "I know it'll just piss me off even more. And besides, asking her to explain it would be pathetic."

"Don't let your ego ruin a good thing, man," he says. "Trust me on this."

"It's not about my ego. It's about what she did," I say. "It's not something I can forgive. You know this about me."

"But she wasn't even with anyone else," he says.

"Working at a place like Elysium, it was only a matter of time," I say. "I want nothing to do with her. The right thing to do would be to fire her."

"What's stopping you?" he asks.

"The kids." I swallow. "They're fond of her. She brings out the best in them. She might have been trying to use me, but I know she cares about the kids."

I have cameras all over this house. I've seen the way she is with them when nobody is watching. I know that it wasn't all an act.

"That's very mature of you," Alaric says.

"I can't believe I was being played this whole time," I say. "I told myself I wouldn't let another woman make a fool out of me, but here I am."

"You're being a drama queen," Alaric says. "It might feel like it right now, but it's really not the end of the world."

When I learned that my high school girlfriend wasn't faithful, it bruised my ego. With Emma, it feels like my very soul is bruised. Everything is black and blue.

"I know it's a cliché, but everything heals with time," he says.

"Oh really?" I ask. "Is that why you're still pining after the girl you met over a decade ago?"

I know it's uncalled for, but I just want to be in a bad fucking mood for a little while. I don't want to make the best of the situation. I just want to sit here and stew in my negativity.

Alaric came here with the intention of trying to make me feel better, but the opposite is happening.

I'm dragging him down to my level.

He stares at the window now even though it's still dark outside and there's nothing to look at.

There's a knock on my door.

"Come in," I say.

Helena steps inside, holding a tray of pancakes. It's accompanied by bowls of fresh butter and blueberry jam.

"I made breakfast," she announces in a cheerful voice.

"Helena, that's wonderful, but it's four in the morning," I say.

Alaric grins at Helena. "You're an angel. We don't deserve you."

"This is homemade blueberry compote," she says, pointing at the chunky blue jam. "I made it just for you."

"Helena, I'm not really in the mood to eat anything right now," I say.

"Speak for yourself," Alaric says, reaching for a plate.

Helena glances at the table, where the ring box still sits, taunting me.

"I heard about what happened," she says, looking at me. "I'm sorry, Klaus."

"It doesn't matter," I say.

She piles three fluffy pancakes onto a plate and tops it with butter and blueberry compote.

"You need to eat something and rest," she says.

"I really don't have much of an appetite right now," I say.

"I know you," she says. "Left to your own devices, you're going to neglect sleep and food. So I added a little something to the blueberry compote. It'll help you rest."

Alaric's eyebrows shoot up.

"Helena," he says. "I didn't know you were cool like that."

Helena keeps her eyes fixed on me. She looks like she wants to give me a hug, but she's holding back.

I stand and open my arms for her.

Her eyes widen as she looks between me and Alaric.

"Oh yeah, that's a new thing he's doing," Alaric says around a mouthful of pancakes. "He let me hug him first."

"I prayed for this moment," she says, wrapping her arms tightly around my middle. I hold her back and notice the way I feel.

There's no more resistance inside me.

Before, even the thought of touching another human being used to make me feel like I would break out in hives. But it feels different now. I'm more open to love.

And...I need this hug, too.

She wipes her cheeks with the back of her hand when we pull apart. Alaric has nearly demolished half of the pancakes.

"Go easy on the blueberry compote," Helena warns him. "You're going to end up in a coma."

"That sounds so relaxing, honestly," Alaric says. "I think that's just what I need. I've been working so hard lately and..."

He trails off when Helena snatches the bowl of blueberry topping away from him.

"You don't even know what I put in it," she says.

"That's how much I trust you," he says.

I don't really feel like eating, but the fluffy pancakes look too inviting. I take a bite and understand why Alaric can't get enough of it.

"It's delicious," I say to Helena.

She watches with satisfaction as I finish my plate in a few bites.

"Get some rest now," she says, clearing the tray and leaving my bedroom. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Good night, Helena," we say in unison.

She smiles at us. The door clicks shut behind her.

"I don't deserve her," I say.

"She really is an angel," Alaric says. "Although it stings when she shows favoritism. You've always been her favorite. You have no idea how jealous that makes me."

"I wonder what she added to the pancakes," I say, leaning back in the armchair.

It feels like having a great cup of coffee in the morning, but ten times better. Some of the anxiety in my head fades, replaced by chemical bliss.

"I don't know, but it was the best breakfast I ever had," he says.

There's a crack of lightning outside. A moment later, thunder follows, along with pouring rain. The scent of wet earth fills my nostrils even though the windows are closed.

"Do you ever wonder if you're cursed?" I ask.

"Cursed to be awesome and superior to everyone else? Yeah, all the time," he says.

When I look over at Alaric, I find him already watching me.

"Shit happens," he says. "But life goes on. You have to keep it moving. It's okay to mourn the relationship you almost had, but you can't let yourself be sucked in by the darkness."

"How?" I whisper.

"By giving your life more meaning," he says. "Reconnect with the children. Do things that you used to love as a kid. Watch a pretty sunset. Read a book. Find beauty in the little things and just keep going."

"Is that how you did it?" I ask, looking over at him.

He clears his throat. "Yeah, I had to learn it the hard way."

"Be honest with me now," I say. "Does it ever get better?"

He's quiet for a moment as he stares out the window. The rain creates a secluded environment, making it feel like the words we exchange tonight are sacred.

"You learn how to cope," he says. "The beautiful thing about life is that each new day is a fresh start. And it gets boring if you stay stuck in the same loop of thoughts."

The rain intensifies, beating against the window like a steady drum. And in this moment, I know that I can say whatever's on my mind and not be judged for it.

"I really don't want to go back to the way I used to be," I say.

"I won't let that happen," Alaric says.

It's not a promise that he should be making, but in this moment, I believe him.

Alaric clears his throat and blinks.

"Fuck, I thought the pancakes were supposed to make us happy," he says.

"She said nothing about happiness," I reply. "Maybe they were meant to make us cry ourselves to sleep."

"You know what? I wouldn't put it past her." He laughs.

I stand and walk toward the bed, seeking some warmth and comfort. Alaric turns off the lights and gets on the other side of the bed, just like when we were kids.

I chuckle into the dark.

"What?" he asks, turning his head toward me.

"I'm thinking back to when we were kids," I say. "If you told me that this is how my life would end up, I would have laughed in your face."

"Why?" he asks, sounding genuinely curious.

I make a sweeping gesture with my arm.

"What do you mean why? It's a dumpster fire."

"Bullshit," he says. "You've done well for yourself. You run multiple successful businesses. You provide for your family. And the biggest achievement of your life—you have a smoking-hot body. Do you have any idea how much I envy your calves?"

"You're right, I am pretty sexy." I chuckle.

"And let's not speak about how humble you are," Alaric says.

"I learned from the best," I say, smiling at my best friend.

There's a warmth in my chest. I know it's artificial, a culmination of chemicals in my bloodstream. But I let myself enjoy the moment of peace.

"Do you hear that?" Alaric asks.

"What?" I say.

"Footsteps," he says.

All I can hear is the sound of the rain pattering against the windows. But a moment later, a shadow appears outside my door. It's in the shape of a person. It could also be a small animal, but I know it's not.

"She always shows up whenever you drop by," I whisper.

"Is she going to try to come inside?" Alaric asks.

"She's harmless," I say, stifling a yawn.

"Should we call someone?" he asks.

"She'll leave when she wants to," I say. "She never stays for more than a few minutes."

The shadow outside shifts. Alaric yelps out loud, which makes me laugh. I stop laughing when I hear a soft, feminine laughter join me.

"Dude, this is beyond creepy," he says, pulling the covers up to his chin. "You heard that too, right?"

"I didn't know she could speak," I say, sitting up in bed and pushing the covers off me.

"Um, where are you going?" he asks, reaching for me.

I ignore him and walk toward the door.

I hear another giggle before the shadow disappears.

"For God's sake, don't open the door," Alaric pleads.

I reach for the door handle.

"I can't watch this," Alaric says, hiding under the covers now.

I swing the door open. At the same time, the door to the room opposite mine opens as well.

Emma stands before me in a long white nightgown. Her hair is in a loose braid, and there are still remnants of glitter on her skin. Her eyes are wide as she stares up at me.

She looks like an angel that entered the world by mistake.

This is how men get deceived—by pretty eyes that look like they contain the entire universe.

"I thought I heard something in the corridor," she says, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

Like always, I notice every little detail about her. The spots of color that appear on her cheeks, the way her breasts stretch the material of her nightgown, the delicate column of her neck.

I want to rage. I want to demand an explanation. I want to hear more of her lies.

Instead of moving toward her like I always do, I close the door in her face and return to my bed.

"Did you see anything?" Alaric asks.

"Nothing important," I reply.

I close my eyes and sink into sleep.

For once, I don't dread any nightmares. It can't possibly get worse than real life.