Page 31

T he last couple of weeks have been a borderline shit show. Between everything that happened at the game with the players being spelled, Eris' attitude, spending time with Zoey, finishing my classwork for the semester, and preparing myself for this trip, I am both mentally and physically drained. The trip especially.

This isn't just another trip abroad. This trip begins abroad, and then I'll be going to a completely different realm, and not the one I'm a lost-freaking-princess of. I can't seem to wrap my head around the fact that I will be on a completely different plane of existence. Like I'd absorbed the information I’d been given. I've seen werewolves and witches alike. But there's something about going there that I just can't seem to process.

I keep trying to relax, but it's just so much. Roman's taken my wolf out on a few runs with his, and it seems to help. When I let my wolf take over, I can pretend that all the troubles of the real world can't reach me. The wind rushing through my fur. The pads of all four of my paws hitting the dirt, pushing off with my claws and moving so fast at times that even the trees around me seem to almost blur. There's such a peace in allowing my wolf to consume my actions for a while. It's like sitting in the passenger seat. You can hear and see everything, but you're not the one driving the car.

I also love watching our wolves interact. Roman and I are still in there, but they prance around together in circles, panting with their tails wagging. Even in my wolf form, he still towers over me, but you wouldn't know it by the way his wolf lets mine tackle him, pinning him to the forest floor. I can feel her excitement pulsing through me and his love through our bond. It's an absolutely incredible experience that I wish I could accurately put into words.

I've even been able to spend time with Khaos and Andrei, really trying to learn who my brothers are.

My soul-brother is so much different than my first impression led me to believe. Like Roman, I think he does it on purpose. If he doesn't get attached to people, then they can't disappoint him later. He loves nineties rock and heavy metal music. He plays drums as a hobby as well as a form of exercise and release. He's not sure what all he wants to do after he retires from hockey, but he really seems to be at peace with his decision. The way he's talked about it, I don't think he ever really loved hockey the way some of them do. I think it was always just an outlet that also happened to let him beat the shit out of people, my mate included.

My twin, on the other hand, is every bit my other half as is my mate, in obviously very different ways. Andrei seems to be the yin to my yang, opposite in so many ways. He only likes hot coffee while I prefer iced. He doesn't care for television or movies but agrees to watch stuff with me when I ask. Where I need structure and things to make sense, he likes to fly by the seat of his pants. Sometimes I just catch him looking at me similarly to the way Roman does…like I might disappear if he blinks. I can't imagine what he went through his whole life. He was forced to live his life without his parents because he could be stolen from them too. He was raised knowing his twin sister was kidnapped, making it his life's mission to find me. It probably doesn't help that I haven't been ready to accept the letter from our parents. As much as I want to, I want to be able to enjoy the words that they wrote for me, and with everything we're constantly facing, that doesn't feel like it will happen any time soon. He swears they'll love me, but there are too many what-ifs pinballing through my brain.

Roman managed to surprise me again by arranging a girl’s weekend for me. He even went as far as taking the men to the pack to spend time with them and introduce Khaos to Brutus and the others. Runa, Zoey, Matilda, and I had the townhouse to ourselves for nearly forty-eight hours. Fran was, of course, hovering around somewhere just in case. We had one whole day that we designated as our Spa Day and pampered ourselves with all kinds of ‘girly shit,’ as my mate calls it. The second day was spent gossiping while movies played in the background. We finally finished Runa's Twilight lessons, and I've never seen her laugh so hard. It’s always my favorite watching people watch the last movie. I'll never forget the entire theater gasping when we got to the part that we all know oh-so-well that turned into a complete plot twist. Chef's kiss. Runa didn't see it coming, and it was all just so carefree and fun.

He definitely knew what he was doing. Allowing me time to unwind before I spend the next however long wound so tight; I don't know how I'll function, but I'll get through. We have to do this.

The dark witch still refuses to speak after all of the men's interrogation tactics that I do not want the details of. Willa also tried to help to no avail. I think she's being brought with us on our trip and brought in front of the witch council to see if they can help us find out what's going on and who they're working for...or with.

“Why must you always think so loudly?” Roman grumbles into my ear, effectively scaring the shit out of me.

I squeal and leap into the air. When I realize it's him, I laugh and swat at him. “How can someone so large sneak up on people without being heard?”

He throws his head back, freely laughing, and I'm taken aback by the beauty of him. Hearing him laugh and seeing him smile fills my tummy with butterflies, my body stops working, and I can't help but just stare at him.

When his attention returns to me, he notices the way my eyes are devouring him. “Come now.” He smiles. “You must finish packing. You've put it off long enough,” he finishes, kissing the top of my head and making his way into the bathroom.

And how exactly am I supposed to focus on packing when he is so good at distracting me?

He snorts from the bathroom, telling me that, once again, my thoughts made it to him through our bond.

When I've finally finished packing, filling all three pink hard case suitcases that Roman bought for me, I smile at the accomplishment, but my stomach churns with thoughts of our trip.

Chasing the worry away, I head back to the kitchen to be with everyone. We decided to have another family dinner since we'll be apart for so long. Just as I almost set myself onto the barstool to watch the way Miss Tilly flits around the kitchen, the doorbell chimes.

That should be Khaos. “I've got it!” I shout. Benny throws me an ornery smile, and we both bolt for the door for no reason other than to have fun. He's way faster than me, but I still beat him because he's a sweetheart and lets me win sometimes. I smile up at him as I reach for the door, letting Khaos in. “Hey, Squirt!”

I beam up at him. I didn't care much for the nickname at first, being sensitive over my size for no reason. Instead, I've decided to fully embrace it. “Hey, Draq!” I spout back, biting my lip to try not to laugh.

Benny and Khaos look at me like I have two heads as Roman joins us, still by the door.

“Draq?” they all three ask in unison, making me lose control of the laugh, and it spills past my lips.

“Well, you call me squirt because I'm little. So, I decided I'll call you Draq because you've got those dark vibes, and you're old as fuck.”

The space erupts into laughter, even Khaos'. He pulls me into his body once more, giving me a soft noogie and messing up my hair, but I can't be bothered to care.

Khaos keeps me tucked under his arm as we head back towards the kitchen, Roman taking his place on my other side.

Our big family dinner went much more smoothly this time. Even Eris didn't look totally miserable tonight. We talked and ate the most delicious spread of American-style Italian food. The stuffed manicotti was my favorite pasta, and I could easily eat my weight in those breadsticks. Olive Garden's got nothing on Miss Tilly.

With our bellies full, the chatter around the table slows, and my heart hurts that we all won't be together. For them, it'll only be a week. For us, it'll feel like three.

“I'm gonna miss you guys.” My voice cracks as I look around the room at our family.

Miss Tilly's eyes water with mine, and Runa smiles sadly.

Roman pulls me from my chair and onto his lap, wrapping his strong arms around me and making me feel so safe and loved.

“We'll miss you too, but you're going to have way more fun than you think,” Runa speaks up. “I've heard Sabbax is stunning. You might be on a mission for information, but don't forget to have a good time,” she finishes with a large encouraging smile.

“She is right about their realm being a sight to behold. You did pack all your camera gear, didn't you?” Andrei asks.

“I did.” I nod. “Roman made sure to add it to my packing list for me…Runa, would you mind texting and checking on Zoey while we're gone? I told her we wouldn't have reception where we are going, but I don't want her to be totally alone if she needs anything.”

“Of course. We already exchanged numbers.”

Nodding and thinking to myself to make sure I'm not forgetting anything, I try to remain calm and not show what I'm doing. Speaking through the pack link, focusing on only Roman and Dolos, Dolos, please really work with your brother while we're gone. Runa's heart hurts, and she's not going to sit around and wait forever.

He flinches slightly at my words, and Roman pats my thigh in approval when Dolos' words reach me, I have been, and I will find a way to get through to him. I feel like I've been making progress. Trust me, Runa isn't the only one hurting through this.

I break character, no longer caring about being inconspicuous, to smile softly at him and offer him a small nod.

“All right, enough of that,” Roman announces as he sets me on my feet to stand. Before I can even think, I'm picked up and heaved over his shoulder. “We should all get some rest. We have an early morning tomorrow,” he says calmly, like I'm not kicking and squealing at him to put me down. I can feel his humor skipping down our bond as he turns to leave the room.