Page 9 of My Ex’s Billionaire Brothers (Forbidden Hearts #5)

ANYA

I step into our motel room, and the thick air hits me like a wall, laden with the faint smell of pizza and cleaning solution.

My pulse thuds in my ears, and my entire body feels as though it’s buzzing.

My hand still trembles on the doorknob from my encounter with Theo outside.

Leaning my back against the closed door, I exhale shakily, trying to calm down.

I have lost my damn mind.

Because the truth is, I’m horrified by what just happened and aroused by what just happened and horrified that I’m aroused by what just happened. There are no words to describe how disconcerting it is to realize I liked Theo’s hand on me.

I liked the idea of him spanking me in some half-lit motel walkway. And I took him up on the offer. Who does that?

A tiny voice in my head screams that I should be ashamed. But another part—the part that’s been caged my entire life—revels in the memory.

Maddeningly, it’s not just Theo I’m drawn to. I can’t stop thinking about Hunter’s playful smile and how he kissed me earlier, or how Gage’s imposing presence makes my heartbeat quicken when he walks into a room.

I push off the door and walk into the main area of the motel suite.

A thin lamp with a tacky shade sits on an end table, casting dingy light across the worn carpet.

The small television on the dresser is turned off, and the only other illumination comes from the stark overhead fixture, which buzzes faintly.

My heart rate spikes again when I notice Gage emerging from the cramped bathroom, wearing nothing but a white motel towel slung around his hips.

The overhead glare highlights every carved line of his chest and arms, his shoulders broad enough to make me swallow hard.

Beads of water cling to his tan skin, rolling over the Sailor Jerry tattoo sleeve on his left arm.

He’s the eldest of the Carver brothers, and physically, the largest—tall, hulking, with a controlled intensity in his gaze.

He catches sight of me and lifts his chin in greeting. “Everything okay?” There’s a tone to his words that makes me think he’d hunt down anything that made me not-okay.

“Yes, I’m fine,” I manage. My focus keeps drifting to the sculpted ridges of his abdomen, and I’m not sure how to politely tear my eyes away.

He seems to notice but doesn’t comment. Instead, he strides over to a small bag near the table and rummages through it.

“Where’s the whiskey?” he murmurs, more to himself than to me.

“I know I put a bottle in here somewhere.” He pats the outside of the bag, then pulls out a bottle of Jack Daniel’s triumphantly.

He looks at me again, gaze flicking over my anxious posture. “Care for a drink?”

“Maybe,” I say, uncertain. “I’m not much of a whiskey person, but tonight might call for something strong.” I’m not sure if I mean the whiskey or him.

He raises a brow, unscrewing the cap. The subtle smell of whiskey seeps into the room. “I wasn’t in the shower long enough for you to have a rough night.”

I let out a nervous half laugh. “Rough life .” I can hardly believe that a day ago, I was engaged to Calvin, living in the lap of luxury without a worry in the world, and now I’m in a seedy motel with his brothers, who want to help me figure myself out. It’s surreal.

The most surreal part is how much happier I am already. Calvin never understood me. Never loved me. The further I am from him, the more I’m wondering if I ever understood or loved him.

Gage pours himself a small measure of whiskey into a motel water cup, then glances up at me. “You want to talk about it?”

I shake my head automatically, but part of me yearns for connection, for a sounding board to help me process all of this.

“I…I don’t know,” I stammer, stepping closer to the small table.

The memory of Hunter’s kiss and Theo’s careful hands is still fresh on my lips and skin, making me feel uncomfortably warm.

Gage leans one hip against the table, still in nothing but that towel, and lifts the whiskey cup to his mouth.

He takes a small sip, eyes on me. “Anya, I can see you’re rattled.

Doesn’t take a genius to pick up on that.

” A faint, knowing smirk curves his mouth.

“Did something happen while I was in the shower?”

I nearly choke on my own saliva, though I manage to keep my composure—barely. I’m hopeless at hiding my reaction, it seems, because Gage’s eyes narrow with curiosity.

“Well,” he says, setting his drink aside, “you’re red as a beet, so I’m guessing the answer is yes.” His voice is teasing but kind, and it coaxes a reluctant giggle out of me.

I stare at the pattern of the carpet, summoning the nerve to admit the truth. “I might have had a moment with Hunter. And then another with Theo. I didn’t plan it. It just happened.”

Gage nods thoughtfully, not at all shocked. “So you’ve had quite the introduction to our twisted little arrangement, hmm?”

“Maybe.” I push hair behind my ear, fidgeting. “I’m sorry. Is that weird? I mean, you three are brothers, and here I am…”

“The idea is for you to explore, figure out what suits you, with whichever of us you choose—or all of us.” He keeps his tone calm, almost reassuring. “But nothing has to happen if you’re not comfortable. The moment you change your mind or say no, everything stops.”

They keep saying that, but in my experience, guys don’t like to stop once you get them going. “Thank you.”

He offers a faint, comforting smile. “We take consent seriously. Always have, always will. That’s how it works at Sins too. No one does a damn thing without your express permission.”

I slide a hand across my stomach, trying to quell the nervous butterflies swirling there. “I never had that. Billy Street, my first boyfriend, never gave me the option—he just pressured me…the way teenage boys do, and I put up with it, because I thought that’s how it was supposed to be.”

“Sounds like he didn’t deserve you either.”

I snort a quiet laugh. “He was the captain of the Purity Club at our school, ironically enough. But behind closed doors, he was anything but pure. The more he pressured me, the less I wanted to date anyone. I didn’t date again until I met Calvin.

” My lips twist into something like regret.

“He charmed me so easily, but I thought it was real.”

Gage’s expression darkens slightly. “He can be smooth when he wants something. But all that glitters is not gold, yeah?”

“Right.” I gaze at the scuffed toe of my sock. “I guess I never expected anything with you three. You’re so different from him. From everything I’ve known.”

“Is that a compliment?” Gage teases lightly, one brow lifting.

I manage a small smile. “Definitely a compliment.”

He shifts his weight, and I find my eyes following the movement of his abdomen and chest. The man radiates power in the subtlest ways, like a coiled spring ready to snap into action. “So,” he says, letting his voice drop a notch, “are you thinking about the offer?”

“It’s practically all I can think about,” I admit, swallowing around the lump in my throat.

“It’s…a lot to process. But I keep thinking about how I’ve fantasized about you three for so long…

ever since that big Christmas dinner two years ago, when I’d just gotten engaged to Calvin.

I felt so guilty for noticing how handsome you all were, for wishing…

well, for wishing you were him.” Heat scorches my cheeks, and I have to look away.

“Now, I guess I don’t have to feel guilty.

But it’s still terrifying. What if I’m not good at any of this? What if you realize I’m boring?”

Gage sets down his whiskey cup, stepping closer.

The dampness of his towel and the shine of water droplets on his broad shoulders give him an almost mythical air, like some giant Greek statue come to life.

He chucks my chin up to force me to look him in the eyes.

“You’re not boring, Anya. Not even close. ”

Tears threaten to sting the corners of my eyes, because I’ve wanted someone to reassure me of that for so long. “Thank you,” I whisper. “I just…it’s new and it’s huge, and I’m scared of doing it wrong or being judged for wanting…for wanting something more than what I’ve had. I want this?—”

“Then do it,” he says gently. “Say it. Let us help you. But remember, you’re in control. If at any point you’re not into it, you say so. And you should have a safeword, so there’s no confusion.”

My lips quirk in a bashful smile. “Billy and Calvin, neither of them were adventurous enough for a safeword.”

He smiles back, something soft and knowing in his green eyes.

“Then let’s pick one. Think of any word that’s easy for you to remember, something you wouldn’t normally say in the heat of the moment.

Maybe a color, or an animal, or anything you like.

That way, if you say it, we stop. No questions asked. ”

I chew on my lower lip, thoughts spinning. “How about…sunflower?” It’s the first random thing that pops into my head, probably because I once had a painting of sunflowers in my old bedroom.

“Sunflower,” he repeats. “All right. That’s your safeword, if you want it.”

I have a safeword. This is real. I’m actually going to do this.

“Thank you.” Despite my nerves, a warmth floods my chest. My entire body hums with the memory of Theo’s hand, the taste of Hunter’s kiss.

Now, the energy between me and Gage is there too.

I lift my chin, mustering every scrap of courage.

“Could we…?” Somehow, I still can’t say it.

His eyes trace my features, lingering on my lips. “We can go as slow as you need,” he murmurs. “Or we can keep it simple for tonight.”

I shake my head. “I think I’d like to kiss you,” I say plainly, ignoring the heat roaring in my cheeks. “Is that all right?”

His mouth curves in a faint smirk. “I’d like that.”

I close the distance, heart hammering. My palms come to rest on his bare chest, and I can feel the hard weight of his muscles under my fingertips, still damp from his shower.

The hum of the overhead light recedes until all I can hear is the thunder of my pulse.

Slowly, I rise onto my tiptoes, and Gage dips his head, bringing our faces closer.

The first brush of our lips is tentative, careful.

He’s letting me lead. But all his energy feels coiled up, barely restrained.

Encouraged, I press in, and the kiss grows more certain.

My hands slip up to the back of his thick neck, fingers tangling in the buzzed silver hair at his nape.

He tastes faintly of whiskey, a heady flavor that makes my mind spin.

His large hands find my waist, wrapping around me with gentle strength.

I exhale a soft moan when he eases his mouth open, guiding me deeper into the kiss. There’s a tenderness in the way his lips move with mine, but it’s a promise of how much more he could give if I ask. It sets every nerve in my body alight.

When we finally break apart, I’m breathing hard, my fingertips still clinging to his shoulders. His eyes are half-lidded, heat swirling in their depths. I’ve fantasized about this for so long. Now, reality eclipses every daydream.

He presses his forehead to mine, our breath mingling. “No regrets?”

I shake my head, a wobbly grin tugging at my lips. “No regrets.”

His grip tightens briefly, and his lips quirk in a smile. “Good. Let us know if you ever have doubts. That includes right this second, or tomorrow, or next week. We won’t hold you to anything if you decide you’re done.”

Tears prick my eyes at the kindness in his words, but I blink them away. “Thank you. Really.”

He nods, releasing me carefully. The cool motel air hits my skin, reminding me of how warm I was in his embrace. “Then let’s call it a night,” he says softly, “unless you’d rather keep going. But you’ve had an intense day. Maybe sleep is best before we push any further.”

My body hums with adrenaline, but I know he’s right. My emotions are a tangled knot, and I’m not thinking straight.

But those lips of his keep calling me.

“You know…um, I haven’t kissed a lot of guys. I might need the practice so I do this right, and you offered to guide me…”

The corner of his mouth quirks up. “I’m not one to leave a lady in a lurch.

” He reaches out, pulling me tight into his arms, and this kiss is not tentative or gentle.

It’s the sort of kiss that sends tingles through my body, right before he turns us, pressing me against the wall.

It’s all I can do not to lose my balance, but Gage would never let me fall.

His hand skates down my side, along my hip, until his huge hand reaches my thigh, pulling me to hook my leg around his.

That’s when I feel it. The man is hard as a rock.

His towel and my leggings are the only things between us.

If we were naked, he’d be poised to slide inside of me.

He grinds against me like this, and sparks flood my body.

Why is a kiss with Gage better than sex with Calvin?

Doesn’t matter. I don’t want to think of Calvin while I’m kissing Gage, so I squash the thought. It’s easier to do when Gage kisses down my chin and my throat, pulling my sweater out of his way to kiss my shoulder, and I’m melting into his hold like I’m under a spell.

His spell.