Page 31 of Mr Darcy’s Worth: Three Pride and Prejudice Variations
“Mr. Darcy, please allow me to leave, sir, while I can still restrain myself from being as rude as my anger demands me to be. Having the chance to see you in a different light lately, to recognise your kindness and generosity, has only made me more furious with you and proved to me how little consideration you have shown to my family since we met. It is your prerogative, of course, but I have the right to condemn it, even if it will turn me into your enemy.”
“I trust I am a better man than to consider you an enemy for the mere reason that we disagreed. I have no reason to doubt you — you certainly know your sister better than I do, so if you are right, I must have been wrong. But I did everything for the benefit of my friend.”
“Your purpose might have been noble, but the result is dreadful. My sister will put her heart together eventually, but Mr. Bingley will certainly not find a woman better suited to him, nor one who cares for him more deeply. And if he is unhappy in his marriage, you will have the satisfaction of knowing that it is the result of your doing everything to his benefit.”
Her last sentences affected him so deeply that his expression was transfigured.
“Now please excuse me. I shall leave you,” she said, then hurried back to the Parsonage.
She was tempted to look back and see whether he was following her but overcame the impulse.
She entered, told Charlotte she still had a headache, and retired to her room.
Her heart was heavy, her head clouded, and she released all her tension by beginning to sob, as she had not done in many years.
Knowing that Mr. Bingley had intended to propose to Jane but had reconsidered only because he believed her indifferent — at his friend’s suggestion — was heartbreaking.
It surely took most of the blame from Mr. Bingley’s shoulders and moved it to those of Mr. Darcy, who, in only a few words, could cause misery with much ease.
For the rest of that day, Elizabeth did not leave her room.
She was in no disposition to see anyone, especially Mr. Collins.
She counted the days till her departure — nine.
As she lay in her bed, she wondered whether she could find a way to leave earlier.
Despite being angry with Mr. Darcy, she felt a strange desire to see him again and talk to him more, which was an even stronger reason for her to shorten her stay in his proximity.
She only gathered herself enough to write to her father and warn him about Mr. Wickham. She insisted that Lydia and Kitty should not be allowed unchaperoned in that man’s company, nor should his presence at Longbourn be encouraged.
The following day, the weather was fine, but Elizabeth refused to accompany Charlotte to Hunsford.
Home alone, she wrote to her aunt, enquiring about the possibility of changing her plans, which depended on Mr. Gardiner’s carriage.
In the afternoon, an invitation for tea came from Lady Catherine, mentioning her nephews were away on business and she needed company.
Elizabeth declined, expressing her desire to obey Lady Catherine’s request and not go to Rosings as long as she felt any sort of illness. Mr. Collins was perfectly content.
Two more days passed in which Elizabeth did not leave the Parsonage at all. She would have enjoyed a walk, but she feared she would meet Mr. Darcy, and she could not bear seeing him again.
Later in the afternoon of the second day, just before dinner, Colonel Fitzwilliam called unexpectedly, enquiring about Elizabeth’s health. She was in the drawing room with Charlotte and had the chance to assure him she was well enough.
“I shall only stay a moment as Lady Catherine is expecting me for dinner. Miss Bennet, I am glad to see you. We were truly worried for you.”
“I thank you, sir. There is no need for concern — it is only a silly headache.”
“I hoped that was the case. Darcy insisted on me advising you to send for the doctor if your pain persists, but obviously, it is not necessary.”
“Obviously,” Elizabeth replied, feeling chills at the simple mention of his name.
“Tell Mr. Darcy we thank him for his advice,” Mr. Collins said. “And assure him my cousin will not go to Rosings and put Miss de Bourgh in any danger.”
“Mr. Darcy is well, I hope?” Charlotte asked. “We have not seen either of you lately.”
“He is. I insisted on him joining me, but he claimed his presence might be too much and might upset Miss Bennet. I really failed to understand his reason.”
“Both you and Mr. Darcy are always welcome in our home,” Charlotte replied, while Elizabeth remained silent.
She felt unsettled knowing that Mr. Darcy had spoken of her and was concerned about her health.
She was also grateful that he had not simply appeared at her door, unannounced, which would have caused her even more distress.
The colonel left, and the family had dinner.
“How kind of Mr. Darcy to be so worried for Miss de Bourgh,” Mr. Collins said. “His affection for her is certainly growing, and Lady Catherine is expecting a marriage proposal any day now.”
“Are you sure, my dear?” Charlotte asked.
“They certainly do not behave like a couple who are courting,” Maria declared. “I have never seen either of them say a single word to the other.”
“My dear Maria, you must know that people of high society do not behave like the rest of us. They do not show their feelings so easily, especially around strangers. Besides, Lady Catherine has told me that their engagement is of a peculiar sort. They have been destined for each other since they were in their cradles. It was the particular wish of his mother and hers.”
“It sounds very complicated,” Maria replied. “I wonder why they have not married all these years.”
Mr. Collins looked appalled.
“My dear sister, let us learn never to judge either Lady Catherine or anyone in her family. They know what to do better than us.”
With that, dinner ended, and Elizabeth excused herself, blaming the same headache.
A new subject of reflection kept sleep away for most of the night.
She kept thinking of that particular engagement and could not but agree with Maria.
If Mr. Darcy had not proposed before the age of eight-and-twenty, the chances of it happening were scarce.
Unless perhaps Mr. Darcy preferred to be single for a little longer before binding himself into a marriage.
His voice when he had spoken about unequal affection in marriage indicated to Elizabeth that the subject was not completely unknown to him.
As much as she tried not to allow her mind to wonder about him, she failed; her thoughts refused to turn in another direction.