Page 11 of Mission to Meryton (Pride and Prejudice Variation #25)
Mr. Bennet scowled as the door opened. His day had been swallowed up by guests, and Longbourn was far louder than usual thanks to the presence of the Gardiner children.
He liked his wife’s brother and family very much, but he also required solitude in his library, and today he had only snatched half an hour after a noisy nuncheon.
His scowl only deepened as his wife and yes, his idiot cousin, Mr. Collins, entered the library.
He glared at his wife, but she merely smiled at him innocently as she said, “Mr. Bennet, Mr. Collins has something of importance to share with me, and I thought it wisest that you be a part of this conversation.”
“Very well,” he answered, repressing a desire to roll his eyes. “Please, do sit down. Mr. Collins, would you care for some brandy?”
“Yes, please!” the man replied, looking around with approval. “Mr. Bennet, you have a very extensive library. Did you inherit these tomes from your father?”
In an instant, Bennet’s irritation vanished to be replaced by unholy glee. Really, his cousin was entirely absurd!
“No, I fear that I purchased most of them,” Mr. Bennet stated gravely. “Thus, the books will pass on to my daughters and will not come with the estate.”
Collins looked vaguely alarmed at his host’s tone. “That is surely a blessing to your amiable children, Cousin Bennet, and I do hope that you live a long and prosperous life.”
“Thank you. Given the lateness of the hour, would you care to share what is on your mind, sir?”
“Yes, yes, of course,” the parson agreed, taking an appreciative sip of brandy.
“I wished to tell you that at the behest of Lady Catherine de Bourgh, I came here not only to heal the breach within our family line, but to find a wife. Lady Catherine declared, with her usual condescension, that I must find myself a gentlewoman to marry, one who is an active, useful sort of person, not brought up too high, who is able to make a small income go a long way. She most graciously directed that I consider one of your daughters as my future partner in life, as she is most concerned for their well-being given the entail which will result in the loss of their home upon your death, Mr. Bennet.”
Bennet glanced at his wife, who looked outraged, and suppressed a grin of delight.
“That is very kind of you, Mr. Collins,” he said earnestly. “Do you have a particular one of my daughters in mind?”
“Miss Bennet is the eldest, of course,” his cousin declared solemnly, “and thus by right of seniority is worthy of being the next mistress of Longbourn.”
“That is entirely sensible of you, sir, but I fear ... Mrs. Bennet, am I correct that Jane is being courted by Mr. Bingley of Netherfield?”
“That is correct, Mr. Bennet,” his helpmeet replied with tight lips.
“Ah, very well, then Miss Elizabeth, who is second to Miss Bennet in birth and beauty, will be my bride.”
“Oh, Elizabeth will not do at all, I fear. She is rather too intelligent for her own good, and would no doubt quarrel with Lady Catherine over the position of shelves in the closet.”
The clergyman looked horrified. “Quarrel? Surely my cousin, when exposed to someone of such rank, such beneficence, will be silent and respectful ...”
“Oh, but she would disagree, mostly loudly. She is a very strong willed young lady, my Lizzy, and I fear does not venerate her elders as much as you require in your bride.”
Mr. Collins shook his head disapprovingly. “There is some great mismanagement in your home, Cousin, if your daughter has not learned to respect those of higher rank.”
“I agree, sir, I agree,” Bennet replied mournfully. “But it is rather too late to fix Lizzy’s many failings.”
Mr. Collins’s mouth turned down sadly as he inquired, “Miss Mary, then?”
Mary was not handsome, and he so wanted to return to Kent with a beautiful bride at his side.
“Oh dear me, no, Mr. Collins! You have no idea how very frivolous Mary is! Lady Catherine specifically desires a bride who can make a small income go a long way, and Mary, well, Mary is accustomed to the very best, in certain areas, anyway.”
Collins’s mouth drooped open to reveal slightly crooked teeth. “Miss Kitty ...?”
“No, no, no,” Bennet interrupted firmly.
“Both Kitty and Lydia are far too young for marriage. Most regrettably, I fear none of our daughters are suitable to be your bride – it is a great pity, but as a Christian, I must be entirely honest with you. Mrs. Bennet, do you have any suggestions for Mr. Collins?”
Frances Bennet, who had been watching all of this with respectful awe, smiled graciously at her guest. “In truth, I do have a suggestion, sir – Charlotte Lucas, the eldest daughter of Sir William Lucas. She is a very sensible young woman, good in the kitchen, kind, temperate, and careful with money. I do believe you could not do much better!”
Mr. Collins stared, flummoxed.
“Miss Lucas?” he asked feebly.
“Yes, indeed,” Mr. Bennet replied firmly. “Do try to win Miss Lucas. You will never regret it.”
/
The man stretched his legs out and took an appreciative sip of wine. It had been a good day but a busy one, and he was ready to enjoy a glass or two of wine and a few minutes with a book before retiring for the night.
The door opened and he looked up in surprise which turned to dismay. He took another hasty drink of his wine and rose to his feet, straightening his back to attain a little more height over his visitor.
“I have not found anything yet,” he declared firmly. “I am not certain the information you have is correct.”
“They are here in Meryton somewhere,” his visitor said coldly, “and you will find them. You must.”
Sweat beaded on the man’s brow. “What if you are wrong? What if there is nothing to be found?”
“For your own sake, you should pray that the information is correct, or you know what will happen.”
The man bit his lip so hard that it bled. Yes, he did know. If he failed in this mission, he was ruined forever.
/
The next morning was a mixture of pleasure and pain for the Bennet daughters; on the one hand, their relatives the Gardiners were always wonderful company.
On the other hand, Mr. Collins was a veritable thorn in their sides with his incessant chatter about Lady Catherine and his parsonage.
At least he no longer gazed avariciously at Jane, to Elizabeth’s relief.
It was not until mid-afternoon, when Elizabeth, Mary, and Mrs. Bennet crept off quietly to the conservatory to work on the tulips, that she learned of what had happened the previous night.
“Father encouraged Mr. Collins to pursue Charlotte Lucas?” she demanded in horror. “Oh Mother, how could he do such a thing to our dear friend?”
“Mary, can you check that set of bulbs and add more water if necessary? It feels a little dry in here. Lizzy, surely you must admit that Mr. Collins is extremely eligible with a good living and the ownership of Longbourn in his future. I daresay Charlotte will be very pleased.”
“He is a fool!” Elizabeth said in exasperation.
“He is rather ridiculous,” her mother agreed, “but Charlotte is nearly on the shelf. Her portion is small and she has no desire to dwindle away in her father’s, then her brother’s, home as an old maid.
I do not believe any of you girls would relish being Mr. Collins’s wife but she may appreciate the opportunity.
If not, she has only to say ‘no’ to the man. ”
“She will not give him the time of day,” Elizabeth prophesied.
/
“I never imagined that Charlotte Lucas, of all people, would accept the overtures of such a man,” Elizabeth murmured disappointedly.
The large drawing room at Longbourn was full as Mrs. Bennet had invited the Lucas family and several officers to dinner.
All of this was to the benefit of the Bennets, who found Mr. Collins much improved when distracted by others.
Elizabeth, seated next to Mr. Wickham during dinner, had much enjoyed the handsome lieutenant’s discourse, but she had noted that Charlotte and Mr. Collins, who were themselves seated side by side across the table, seemed to be on marvelous terms. As soon as the gentlemen joined the ladies after dinner, Mr. Collins had settled next to Charlotte Lucas and was chattering at her with great enthusiasm.
Mary, who was helping her pour tea and coffee for the guests after dinner, shook her head decidedly, “I am not surprised in the least, Lizzy. You have a strong will and considerable beauty, not to mention a dowry which currently stands at twelve thousand pounds, and is growing every year. Charlotte is older, plainer, and poor. She is also more accommodating than you are.”
“But if she accepts him,” Elizabeth whispered back, and actually felt tears start in her eyes. It sounded like hell on Earth to share a house and yes, a bed, with such a tiresome dullard.
“If Charlotte accepts him,” Mary continued placidly, “she will have a home of her own, and the expectation of having children. She would also be able to serve the parishioners in the area, and Charlotte is rather wasted at Lucas Lodge. She has a very practical bent and was born to be a parson’s wife.
No, I understand Charlotte’s perspective entirely. ”
Her elder sister bent an alarmed look on her and asked, “Do you wish that Father had pointed Mr. Collins towards you, Mary?”
“I do not,” Mary declared decidedly. “My dowry is sufficient that if I never wed, I can live comfortably on the interest. Furthermore, I would not wish to leave Longbourn and the tulips before I need to do so.”
Elizabeth relaxed a little and struggled to make peace with circumstances beyond her control. At least she would not be forced to call Mr. Collins a brother.
Kitty arrived to take over her duties with the coffee pot, and Elizabeth found herself drawn to Mr. Wickham, who had met her aunt, Mrs. Gardiner, before dinner and was now speaking with her animatedly.
“My dear Lizzy!” her aunt exclaimed as she approached. “This young man is from Derbyshire and knows Lambton and its occupants well! It has been such a joy to speak of the familiar landscapes and mutual friends.”
“I am equally delighted,” Mr. Wickham said, bowing slightly to Elizabeth and smiling to expose his perfect teeth. “It has been longer than I prefer since I walked the beautiful lanes of Pemberley, but I will never forget it, and it is an honor to share my memories with your aunt.”
Elizabeth smiled back at him and felt a strange thump in her chest. This man was almost ridiculously handsome and charming.
“While I have a moment, Miss Elizabeth,” the lieutenant continued, “might I inquire as to whether you and your family will be present at the ball at Netherfield three nights from now?”
“We would not miss it for the world, Mr. Wickham,” Elizabeth declared.
“Might I have the honor of dancing the first set with you?”
Elizabeth tilted her head saucily. “Well, sir, I do not know. Are you a good dancer?”
“I believe it is incumbent on every officer in his Majesty’s militia to be a good dancer, Miss Elizabeth.”
“Then yes, sir, and thank you. I look forward to it very much.”