Page 19

I can’t sleep and it’s all Midnight’s fault.

I told him I forgave him this morning, and it was the truth, but I can’t help feeling hurt over it still. I knew it was wrong to let things go that far. I should have stopped him at the kiss.

I didn’t want to, though. For once, I wanted to be selfish. I wanted a reward for surviving this far.

The consequences weren’t worth it, though.

I was so angry that he rejected me after giving me the best orgasm of my life that I stormed into his room. Only, the entire space feels and smells like him. It was torture.

As I lay in his bed, I let the reality of the situation set in. It was an impulsive thing to do. He could fire me from both of my jobs. I would get over losing the tattoo gig, but watching the girls? That would break my heart, especially since I know the kind of pain that they are already in. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself.

That’s why I accepted his apology so easily this morning. I could have made him grovel, but it wasn’t worth it. The girls don’t need to see that. They need to see what forgiveness looks like.

Sometimes forgiveness doesn’t take the hurt away, though. I know I’m younger than him, but that shouldn’t matter. I’ve lived a lot more life than most. That makes my soul older than most.

My phone lights up the room. With it being on silent, I have no idea what it could be. I turn over to see what it is. I assumed it would be an email, but I’m surprised to see a text from Midnight.

Midnight: Come out back, please.

I stare at the text for a moment while I decide what to do. I could pretend I didn’t see it. Even if the message shows as read, maybe I hit it in my sleep.

I called him a coward, though, and I refuse to be one too, so I climb out of bed. I consider putting clothes on, but fuck him. He can deal with my sleep shorts and tank. I didn’t ask for a middle-of-the-night meeting. He did, so he can deal with it.

Crossing my arms, I make my way out of my room. I poke my head in to check on the girls. They are still fast asleep.

Closing the door, I start heading down the hall.

What could he want? I’m not sure I want to be alone with him right now. I still feel the echoes of pleasure he made me feel. After the way he reacted afterward, it only makes me feel dirty.

I take a deep breath, stepping onto the back porch, closing the door behind me. He is facing away from me, wearing that leather jacket I love so much. I should have run off with it.

Then he turns, holding the biggest bouquet of flowers in his hands. There is a variety of roses along with some lilies and other flowers I’ve never seen before.

It’s beautiful.

“These are for you.” He holds them out to me, looking nervous.

I’ve never seen Midnight look less than intimidating, but right now, he kind of does.

I take the flowers and bring them up to my nose. I’ve never been given flowers before.

“What is this for?” I ask.

“You deserve better than what I gave you this morning. You deserve a real apology. I’m sorry I was such a dick last night. It had nothing to do with you and everything to do with me. I don’t want to give you excuses, but if you are willing to listen, I can try to explain myself. If not, I understand. I wouldn’t blame you for hating me.”

My heart beats rapidly in my chest. He doesn’t have to go through all of this with me, but he is. It means a lot to me.

More than it should.

“I’ll listen,” I tell him, moving to the couch.

My cheeks heat at the reminder of what we did last night. I try to ignore the errant thoughts, though, and focus on him as he takes the seat next to me. I hold the flowers in my lap, grateful I have something to keep my hands busy.

“I went through a lot of shit with Miranda. I’ve lived the past eleven years of my life scared of making a mistake that I’ve started living my life based on her reactions instead of what I want. I’m still scared to death that she is going to yank the girls from my life, and she’s not even here. So what I said last night had nothing to do with you and everything to do with the fact that you were right. I was being a coward. I was living in fear of what she would do when I should be living my life for myself and my girls. I can’t predict the future, but I don’t want to let her stop me from living anymore. If she comes back, we will deal with it, but until then, we deserve to live and be happy.”

I nod. “Okay. I’m happy for you that you realized your issue. The flowers are nice, but not necessary.”

He frowns at me. “I want to do this with you, Lainey.”

“I’m too young. You said that, not me,” I tell him.

“I know what I said. I didn’t mean it. Or I guess I did, but I only meant how it would look to Miranda. It was dumb. I like you. A lot, and I want to explore this.”

He reaches out to take my hand, leaving the flowers on my lap.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

I look down at our joined hands. My stomach is in knots. I like the way it feels when he touches me. It’s like electricity.

No matter how much I like it, I won’t risk losing the girls over a fling. If we take this any further, that’s what will happen when he eventually leaves me.

“It probably isn’t, but I can’t keep resisting you. You are on my mind constantly. If I’m not worrying about the girls, I’m worried about you.”

I shake my head. “That’s this hero complex you have. You’ve been saving me since you met me. I don’t want you to confuse that with real feelings.”

He squeezes my hand tightly. “Dammit, Flower. That’s not it. Had you been anyone else walking through that door that night, I wouldn’t have taken a second look. It has nothing to do with that and everything to do with you. What do I need to do to prove it to you?”

“I can’t tell you that because I don’t know. Actions speak louder than words, Midnight. I’m not risking the girls’ happiness over fleeting pleasure,” I whisper softly.

He cups my cheek. “Who said this was fleeting? Do you think I would risk the girls over something temporary? I’m not saying we go out and get hitched tomorrow, but I think this chemistry between us is something real. The question is, are we going to explore it and see if it leads to something permanent, or are we going to pretend it doesn’t exist? I’ll tell you, pretending doesn’t work.”

I rub my lips together as I consider his words. Five minutes ago, I would have said no and went to bed, but now that I have him in front of me, I can’t find the words.

I don’t want to deny him. I want to explore the feelings I have for him.

After several moments of silence, I speak up. “If it doesn’t work out, you can’t just fire me. We would need to figure out a way to let the girls know and not destroy their world.”

“See. This is another reason I’m falling for you. You care about those girls like they are your own. I see that, Lainey. They do too.”

Then his lips are on mine.

I don’t know if I made the right choice, but my heart feels like I did. I only hope it remains intact when my world comes crashing down because it will.

I can’t be lucky enough to be able to keep this man.

I kiss her lips twice before I pull back.

I don’t deserve a second chance with this woman, but she’s willing to give it to me.

I won’t fuck it up this time.

I let my forehead rest on hers as I pull back. “I promise I won’t fire you. In the event that this doesn’t work out, I won’t rip you from their lives. I wouldn’t want to hurt you or them like that.”

Hurting any of them like that would kill me.

“Okay,” she whispers.

“Okay? You’re in this with me?” I ask, heart racing.

She nods. “Let’s live in the moment.”

I don’t waste another second. I devour her lips with mine. She pushes against me, her passion matching mine. She opens her mouth, matching my tongue stroke for stroke.

She pulls back. “Midnight.”

“Michael. If you’re my girl, you call me by my government name. At least when we are here,” I tell her.

She smiles. “Michael then.”

I nip her neck. “Yes, Flower?”

Her cheeks heat. “I have a request.”

“Anything you want,” I tell her, knowing I mean it.

If she asked me to rob a bank with her, I’d do it. If she wants to go on vacation with her, I’d ask where and make it happen. I want to give her everything she fucking wants and then some.

“I don’t want last night being the last memory on this couch. Make me a better one?”

Shit, that’s it?

“As you wish,” I tell her, moving her flowers to the ground as I lie her back. She doesn’t question me. “Try to stay quiet for me.”

“Yes, sir,” she whispers, looking up at me.

I kiss her softly at first, growing more impatient as she grinds up on my cock. Moving from her lips, I kiss and bite down her neck, loving the red marks being left behind. Through her tank top, I bite her pebbled nipple, flicking my tongue against it, making her moan.

I repeat the action on her other breast, making her squirm beneath me. Then I kiss her stomach, making my way to her pussy.

“Michael,” she whimpers.

“Shh. I’ll take care of you. Be a good girl.”

She nods, letting out a little whine.

I fucking love it. The fact that I have her so needy for me that she is losing herself, it is a heady feeling.

Pushing her tiny sleep shorts aside, I smirk at how wet she is. She is glistening for me.

“I’ve been dreaming about how you taste for weeks now. You going to let me taste you?” I ask her.

“Yes, please.”

“Yes, what?” I ask her.

“Yes, sir,” she says breathlessly, making my cock twitch.

“Good girl. Hold on and I’ll make you come,” I tell her.

Then I taste her for the first time. She tastes like heaven. So sweet and all mine.

Mine.

I like the sound of that.

I go to work on her pussy, treating it like my own personal buffet. Using two fingers, I slide into her tight, wet heat while I attack her clit with my tongue. Her hands find their way into my hair as I give her the pleasure I have been dying to give her.

“Oh, oh,” she moans out.

“You’re not being very quiet.” I smack her clit, making her jolt.

She bites her lip, trying to muffle her moans in response.

I go back to work, curling my fingers inside her as I work her up with my tongue. I feel the moment she comes. Her pussy clamps down on my fingers as her legs close on my head. She pulls at my hair crying out.

I continue to lick her slowly until her legs start to relax. Then I push myself up through her legs and kiss her lips. “You taste so sweet. I love it,” I tell her between kisses.

Then she shocks the hell out of me. She licks the side of my lips, taking a taste of herself.

“Not bad.” She winks at me. “The beard is a nice touch. Felt amazing between my thighs.”

I chuckle. “Glad you approve.”

“That was one hell of an orgasm.”

“There are plenty more to come,” I whisper, kissing her softly.

We are slowly getting back into it when my phone rings, and I pull back, cursing. “I need to take this.”

She smiles. “I’m going to go clean up and go to bed. Are you joining me?”

I smirk at her. “If I can, I will.”

She nods. “Club stuff. I get it.”

I answer the phone as I watch her go inside. “What?” I bark into the phone.

“Someone is testy. I found her,” Trigger says.

My heart stutters to a stop in my chest. “Where?”

“She never left the state.”

“Where?” I ask, dread filling my gut.

Trigger pauses. “She’s in fuckin’ Vegas, man.”

My stomach sours. She’s literally next door. Just minutes away.

“What else?”

“She’s staying at some high-end building. Get this, though. A lot of high-profile people live in this building.”

I already know where he is going with this.

I pinch the bridge of my nose. “People like the one running for mayor?”

“That would be the one. You know what this means, right?” Trigger asks.

I do. If she is telling secrets to William, Reaper won’t let her live. It won’t matter that she’s the mother to my kids. Any threat to his woman has to die.

“I know. Have you told him yet?”

“No. I thought you would want to process it. I’ll tell him in the morning.”

“Thanks, I appreciate the heads-up. I’ll head over there in the morning to meet you. I need to see the girls before I leave.”

“Oh yeah. How is your little flower doing?” he teases.

Usually, I would be grumpy and hang up, but instead I smile. I didn’t realize I was giving her a road name when I called her Flower, but I guess I knew she was mine before I was willing to admit it to myself.

“She’s great. About to go crawl into bed. See you tomorrow.”

I hang up as I hear him talking, but I don’t want to hear anything he has to say. Not when I have a beautiful woman in my bed.

I walk around the house, making sure it’s all locked up before I head down the hall. Slipping into the room, I smile at her lying in the bed.

Undressing down to my boxers, I slip into the bed beside her. She turns over, cuddling into my chest, bringing me a level of peace I didn’t know existed.

I know I should be more upset about the shit Trigger just told me, but I can’t bring myself to care. Not when I have Lainey in my bed and in my arms.

“Good night, Michael,” she whispers.

I kiss the top of her head. “Good night, Flower.”

As her breathing evens out, all I can think to myself is one thing.

I could get used to this.