Page 20 of Matthias’s Protective Embrace (Cardinal Falls #3)

Chapter Thirteen

FRANK

I’m not the most perceptive guy. Most days, I only get subtlety if it comes in the form of a bulldozer. But my senses are tingling, and I’m pretty sure they’re telling me that Matthias is interested.

In me.

I know, it’s ridiculous. He’s got this whole life put together, and I’m…

well, me. I’m not a complete mess, but most days, I’m holding the pieces together with duct tape and a prayer.

Today included, since I sounded pathetic enough to get myself an invite over to his place on a holiday when he would clearly rather be organizing his sock drawer than watching this movie.

Except, I think he’s enjoying it. Maybe not the actual movie, but being on the couch with me. At least, I think that’s what it means when he keeps inching closer. Each time he reaches for something on the coffee table, he manages to get his tree trunk thighs half an inch closer to me .

At this rate, he’ll finally be touching me sometime around February. I don’t have that kind of patience.

And since he’s being all shy about it, it’s up to me to make things happen. It’s the least I can do. For someone who seems so in control all the time, he almost seems shy tonight.

Lucky for him, I’m anything but timid when it comes to sex. At least, I hope that still applies, given that it’s been… well, it’s been a while. Work, school, and living with my parents don’t pair well with a hook-up lifestyle.

“I’ll be right back,” I say, pushing myself off his oversized sofa. “Bathroom.”

“You want me to pause it?”

“Nah, I’ve seen it before.” Probably fifty times. I could recite the thing by heart if needed. I hear him huff in the background. I can’t help but snicker thinking about him watching the cartoon by himself.

In the bathroom, I dig through the cabinet for the mouthwash I know is there, having used it during my previous stay.

If I’m going to make a move, it’s going to be with fresh breath.

The flavor he has is terrible, some invigorating mint bullshit that makes my mouth burn, but at least I no longer taste like mashed potatoes. Not the best first impression.

I flush the toilet and turn on the faucet, in case he’s listening, before returning to the living room.

When I sit, I make sure to slide myself closer, leaving a sliver of space between us.

Matthias tenses for a second, and I fear I’ve misjudged the situation.

Before I can react, he relaxes his shoulders and sighs.

As he releases a breath, his legs fall open enough that he’s touching me.

It takes all the self-control I can muster not to suck in a breath at the contact, instead trying to pass it off like it’s no big deal.

But. Oh. My. God. Matthias is touching me. And woah, it lights up every fiber in my body. I try to pretend I’m watching the show since it’s my pick, but I can’t keep my eyes off of the spot where we’re connected.

Step one of my poorly formed plan is complete. Somehow, I need to get from here to the next step, which involves kissing. There may be a few details missing in the execution. Basically, I’m winging it.

“Frank?”

“Yeah?”

“Are you okay?” There’s a hint of worry in his voice.

“Yeah, why?”

“You’ve been fidgety ever since you got back from the bathroom.” My seduce Matthias plan now has him worried that I’m in some sort of GI distress. Not sexy.

“Restless, I guess.” Somehow, I doubt that’ll be enough for him to drop it.

“Do you want to watch something else?” He turns toward me, his deep green eyes examining me closely, probably still worried I’m about to be sick on his spotless sofa. “Or we don’t have to watch anything.”

It’s a tiny opening, but I’m taking it. “What would we do instead?” I lick my lips, hoping he can take a hint.

“Whatever you want. I have a couple of board games and an Xbox , though—” Nope, can’t take a hint . I don’t wait for him to finish explaining the entertainment system, instead launching myself into his lap. Subtle? Nope, but that’s never been my style.

As soon as I’m close enough, I press my lips to his, going slow in case he wants to shove me off.

Matthias’s lips are pillowy soft, but the rest of him is stiff beneath me—and not in the good way.

For a second, I’m sure I’ve misjudged the whole situation.

I’m ready to pull back, apologize profusely, and make a run for it when he relaxes, wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me tight against him like he never wants me to leave.

Please don’t want me to leave.

When he licks along the seam of my lips, I’m more than happy to open to him. Despite the urgency coursing through my system, Matthias stubbornly stays gentle, exploring my mouth slowly and deliberately. It’s only when I desperately need air that I let myself pull back at all.

“Frank.”

Oh God, I know what comes after my name.

Discussions of how we can’t do this, why it’s not a good idea.

And likely some version of “ it’s not you, it’s me .

” I’m not sure I can take any of those things right now.

Once again, I’m in his living room wishing a wormhole would open and swallow me up, whisk me off to some strange planet.

“Look at me, Firecracker.”

Firecracker. He called me that once before. As far as nicknames go, it’s not the worst. If he’s calling me that, it can’t be all bad. Right?

I meet Matthias’s gaze, his eyes big, pupils blown.

Even in this position, with me on his lap, our height difference is still noticeable.

Is it wrong to love it? I don’t think I’ve ever found being short quite so sexy.

It’s something about the way he towers over me.

Instead of feeling silly or threatened, I feel safe.

“Frank, what do you want?”

What do I want? I want him to take me to his bedroom and have his way with me until I can’t remember my name. More than once, preferably. I can’t say that, though. Right? “You.” It’s the one word my brain can settle on .

MATTHIAS

Frank kissing me was not on my bingo card tonight. As much as I’ve tried to keep my attraction to him at bay, his climbing into my lap and initiating contact is too much to resist. I’m not that strong. Not even close.

Now he’s sitting here, waiting for a response from me, and there’s so much to say; so much I want to tell him. We need to clarify before we go any further. “I want you, too, Firecracker. But I want to know what you see happening.”

“Like a play-by-play?” he asks with a squeak.

“No.” I manage to bite back my laughter, but only just. “Is this a one-night thing for you?” He bites his lower lip, and I take the opportunity to pull the poor, worried skin from between his teeth. “There’s no wrong answer here, but I need to know what you’re thinking.”

“Ideally?” I nod. The confident man who leaped into my lap and took charge has disappeared, leaving behind insecurities. I run my hands over the sides of his abdomen, hoping it clarifies my interest. “More than one night?”

Thank fuck. As much as I want to see him spread naked on my bed, I’m not a casual guy, not when it comes to partners.

Once I get him, letting him go would break my heart.

I can barely watch him leave my home at the end of the night when he’s been here studying.

Watching him crawl out from beneath my sheets, with no intention of coming back, would destroy me.

I can see his nerves coming to the surface, so I lean in, distracting him with another kiss.

He opens beautifully for me, letting me take as much as I want from him, but without being passive.

It’s clear he’s kissing me back but also letting me lead.

While I doubt he’d ever be truly submissive, it’s nice to see that he’s willing to let me be in charge.

When I come up for air again, Frank’s much more relaxed, forehead pressed against my shoulder as he pants.

“We’ve got a lot to talk about, Firecracker.

” I wish we didn’t, but until we do, I’m not willing to go further than kissing.

It’s only fair to both of us that we’re clear on what a relationship means.

I’ve been down this road too often and had my heart shattered too many times to do it any other way.

“I’m negative and on PrEP,” he says. “I got tested a few months ago for my physical, and I haven’t been with anyone since.”

“That’s good to know, Frank. I’m negative, too, but there’s more we need to discuss.

” He huffs like I’m the most frustrating man on Earth.

I might be right now. To both of us. My cock would much rather we give up the discussion and move straight to the bedroom.

“I want you to be sure before we go further. It’s important to me. ”

“I’ve been trying to figure out how to make a move on you for seven weeks. I’m not going to get any surer than I am right now.”

“Seven weeks?” That’s how long it’s been since they started on my backyard.

“Since you called me a thief.”

I groan, maybe a little loudly. “You’re killing me.” We could’ve been doing this the whole time? Fuck . “Still, I want to talk about some things, and, to do that, we need clear heads.” Some sleep and a little less alcohol on board. And maybe a cold shower. Or three.

He stands up, awkwardly, sliding off my lap. “It’s okay if you don’t want this. I can head out. I didn’t drink that much.”

Absolutely not. “That’s not what I’m saying at all.

” He grumbles something I can’t quite hear.

“Clear communication is important to me and the most important part of building a relationship. Besides that, I’m taking you on a real date before we sleep together.

” I’d put a higher number on that, but something tells me we won’t make it that long.

“You want a relationship with me?” He’s back to biting that bottom lip again. This time, as soon as I give him a stern look, he releases it. Good, we’re making progress.

“I’d like to try that out, but only if you want to.”