Page 36 of Madness & Mercy (Deadly Sins #1)

JULIAN

When we roll up to the Estate, Enzo’s already waiting out front like he’s been guarding the place.

“How’s he doing?” Nico asks before the car’s even fully stopped.

“He’ll live,” Enzo says. “Not the first time Luca’s been shot. Bullet went clean through the shoulder. You find Romano?”

“In the trunk,” Nico answers, tossing him the keys. “You know what to do.”

Enzo unlocks the car, his eyes cutting between me and Cassian. One brow arches, the corner of his mouth twitching like he’s not sure if he wants to laugh or ask questions.

“Damn. If it weren’t for the clothes, I wouldn’t be able to tell you two apart.”

I roll my eyes. “Don’t worry. He’s not staying long.”

Cassian smirks like I just dared him instead of making a statement.

“Enzo, is it?”

He sticks out a hand.

“Nice to meet you.”

Enzo mirrors the smirk. “Likewise. You’re a lot more polite than your twin.”

Nico laughs. I scoff. “Whatever. Let’s get this over with.”

We head inside as Enzo drives off. The moment we step through the door, I freeze.

Nico’s mother is waiting at the foot of the staircase.

She lives in the guest house, but I’ve barely seen her since the day I got here.

Nico says she travels a lot, but she’s more like a ghost, appearing only when she wants to haunt you.

Her gaze flicks over me and lands on Cassian. Her eyes narrow.

“Another one?”

Nico smirks. “This is Cassian, Julian’s twin brother.”

“Good evening, ma’am. Lovely home you have here,” Cassian says smoothly. My skin prickles. That smug bastard could charm a snake.

She nods but doesn’t answer him.

“Is it done?” she asks Nico.

“Silvio’s corpse is rotting as we speak,” he says. “Enzo’s handling cleanup.”

“Good.” She steps closer to him. “I’ll be out of town for a few days. Keep things in order.”

“Of course,” Nico says. “Safe travels.”

She nods once, then sweeps outside with two guards in tow.

The second she’s gone, Nico turns to us.

“Follow me,” he says, wearing that smug expression that makes me want to kill him—or kiss him—depending on the minute.

He leads us into one of the dining rooms, and heat creeps up my neck the moment I see the table.

The same one he pinned me against not too long ago.

“Have a seat,” he says.

Its table’s been set, wine already poured.

Nico pages the chef, who appears shortly after, carrying a platter of steaming pasta, roasted vegetables, and a smaller plate stacked with fresh bread still warm from the oven.

The scent hits me first—garlic, herbs, something sharp and citrusy—but I can’t fully appreciate it with Nico lowering himself into the chair across from me like a man about to conduct an interrogation.

Cassian slides into the seat beside me, the corner of his mouth lifting. “Nice place. You always eat like royalty?”

“Depends who’s at my table,” Nico says. His gaze cuts to me. “Some people don’t deserve the best.”

My fork stills halfway to my plate. “Glad to know where I stand.”

“Oh, you know exactly where you stand, cucciolo,” he says. “But I’d like to know why you thought it was a good idea to keep your brother from me.”

“It’s complicated.”

Nico leans back, wineglass in hand, swirling the dark red lazily. “Everything with you is complicated. Tell me, was this about loyalty? Or are you just addicted to lying to me?”

I feel the heat creep up my neck. “You think I lied to you for fun?”

“I think you lie because it’s in your nature,” he shoots back, “And the only reason we’re both breathing right now is because I had five million to wave in your brother’s face.”

Cassian clears his throat. “If you two are gonna start flirting with knives, maybe wait ‘til after dessert.”

I glare at him, but Nico’s mouth twitches in a way that tells me he’s enjoying this too much. “You got something to add, Cassian?” Nico asks.

“Only that you’re wrong,” Cassian says, leaning back like he owns the damn place. “That’s not why I killed Silvio instead of you.”

Nico tilts his head, amused but watchful. “No? Then enlighten me.”

Cassian’s gaze slides to mine. “Because I realized my dickhead brother was in love with someone. And I couldn’t bring myself to take that from him.”

The air goes razor-thin. Nico’s eyes snap to mine, the weight of them sinking straight into my skin.

I look down, tearing a piece of bread I don’t want, pretending my chest isn’t caving in on itself.

Nico’s voice dips low, dangerous and indulgent all at once. “Interesting,” he murmurs, and I know he’s not talking to Cassian anymore.

“What happened between you two?” Nico asks Cassian after a pause, his tone deceptively casual.

Cassian takes a slow drink of wine, like he’s considering how much to give away. “You want the full story?”

They’re both acting like I’m not even in the room. I drain my glass in two swigs. “Fine. You wanna know what happened? Cass and I were close as kids, even if he was a giant pain in the ass.”

Cassian smirks. “Sure. I’m the pain in the ass. Be honest, Nico—how many headaches does he give you a day?”

“Fuck off, Cassian.”

Nico glances at me over the rim of his glass, smiling like he knows exactly how to unnerve me. “Too many to count. But he makes it worth it.”

Cassian laughs, which only pisses me off more.

“You want the story or not?” I snap.

He lifts his hands. “Go on.”

I lean back. “We may look the same, but we’ve never been the same. Everyone loved him. He got good grades, excelled in sports, made friends everywhere he went, had girlfriends. I… wasn’t wired that way. Most people only bothered with me when they mistook me for him. So yeah, I resented him.”

Cassian’s smirk fades. “Don’t act like you weren’t the smartest one in the family. People liked me, sure. But you—”

“That’s not the point.” My jaw tightens. “You could connect with people. I couldn’t. And I was—” I stop before I say too much.

Cassian fills the silence. “What he’s trying to say is, he shut me out because he thought he wasn’t good enough.”

“That’s not why,” I bite out. “It’s… you felt everything, Cass.

You were a sensitive kid. I was the opposite.

I wanted to feel, but I couldn’t. I was broken.

And it pissed me off that you didn’t even have to try.

So I… pushed myself toward destruction. Because I thought maybe if I destroyed everything, I’d finally feel alive. Maybe everyone would be better off.”

Nico’s hand closes over mine under the table, firm and grounding. “You’re not broken. There’s nothing wrong with you.”

I pull away, shaking my head. “You don’t get it, Nico. I’m not someone you want to love. I’m not normal.”

He leans in slightly, voice low. “Do I look like I give a damn? Nothing about us is normal. I still love you.”

The words hit too hard. “No, you don’t. Stop saying that! You can’t love someone like me. I don’t even know if I’m capable of it. I’m a fucking sociopath.”

Nico catches my wrist before I can stand, his stare locking me in place. “Even if you were, what makes you think I’d care? I murder for a living.”

“That’s different,” I say sharply. “You do it for your family. I do it to feel something. I lie without thinking. I don’t feel empathy, remorse, guilt… half the things I should. I’d make a shitty partner. You’re better off without me.”

“You’re just scared,” he says quietly. His thumb presses against the rapid beat of my pulse. “You don’t have to be. I’m right here.”

My breath hitches, and I sink back into my seat.

Cassian’s gaze moves between us. “You’re both insane.”

“Thanks, asshole,” I mutter.

“You didn’t let me finish,” he says with a small smile. “You’re both insane… which is probably why you’re perfect for each other.”

Heat crawls up my neck.

Cassian stands, pushing his chair back. “My brother’s never been in love before. He’s not great at expressing it, but—” his eyes flick to Nico “—take care of him, will you?”

I frown. “Cass… you don’t have to go.”

“I know. But you two need space.” He starts to turn away.

“It’s late,” Nico says. “Stay in a guest room. Enzo will drive you in the morning. I’ll wire you something for the trouble.”

Cassian raises a brow. “That’s not necessary.”

“Please. It’s the least I can do.”

Cassian nods once. “Fine. But just so we’re clear, if you ever hurt my brother, I’ll shoot you for real.”

Nico smiles faintly. “Understood.”

The guard disappears with Cassian, his footsteps fading down the hall until the silence feels too thick. Then it’s just me and Nico.

God, the way he’s looking at me—like he’s peeling me open with his eyes, weighing every sin and weakness. It’s dangerous, the kind of look that says he’s already decided what I’m worth.

And the worst part? My pulse isn’t only from fear.

He makes me feel things I’ve spent years burying deep, things that have no place here.

That’s what scares me the most.

Nico leans in just enough for his voice to curl around me.

“You alright, cagniolo?”

Fuck…

No, I’m not alright. How can I be in this situation?

Alone with him, the weight of everything Cassian said still hanging between us, and the memory of Nico’s earlier words still burning like a brand on my skin.

He told me he loved me. And Cassian, that smug bastard, told him I was in love with him too.

Nico’s gaze pins me in place. Dark. Patient. Almost… hungry.

“You’re quiet,” he says softly, the corner of his mouth curving like he’s already two steps ahead of me. “Thinking about what your brother told me?”

I swallow hard, heat crawling up my neck. “That’s not it.”

“No?” He leans back in his chair, all lazy dominance, the picture of someone who knows he’s in control. “Because he told me something interesting. That you love me.”

I shift in my seat. “He doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”

“Hmm.” The toe of his boot nudges mine under the table. Then it slides forward, the leather brushing along my ankle, my calf, until it rests against the inside of my knee. My breath stutters.