Page 42 of Ly to Me

“Talk to me, sweetheart.” She needed to stay awake. If she had taken something else—“Did you take anything?”

“Nnnn.” Her head rolled to the side, and she groaned. I lifted her eyelid, feeling an ounce of relief as her pupils dilated with the light, the whites of her eyes still just as bright. If she had any drugs, I would have found evidence of it in her car. She wasn’t lying, but—

The fucking bottle. The liquor smell permeating from her lips.

“Ly. I need you to answer me. How many times did you refill your bottle with liquor?” She groaned longer, and her hand moved to my chest, fisting my shirt.

White-hot anger rippled through me, this time, at myself. Of what I’d done. I’d been so focused on getting Lyra to crumble that I’d completely missed how her bottle with the same picked-over label came back to the table when a fresh bottle should have been in her hand.

“Stay awake.” Beautiful brown hair was stuck to her forehead over a sheen of sweat. I smoothed it away and her lips parted as her hazy eyes opened. “Stay with me.”

I glanced at the bathroom door, knowing sooner or later, that was the next stop. She adjusted herself against me, like she’d do when we were young and I was her comfort, then murmured into my chest, “I’m sorry, Car.” She nodded off, her breaths lengthening while mine struggled to regulate. I traced the lines of her brows with my knuckle, the angle of her jaw with my fingertips, and the top of her forehead with my lips as I held her closer.

“Me too, sweetheart. Me too.”

TEN YEARS AGO

“You are comin’ tonight, right?” Jared asked, looking at me like he hadn’t been my friend for years.

“Depends. Is Noah going to show his face?”

His backpack straps raised as he shrugged. “I dunno. Probably not if I tell him you’re going to bring the weird—” My eyes bore into his. Jared cleared his throat. “Lyra,” he finished and kicked a rock before leaning against the school’s brick wall. “Man, I don’t know if you’re just really into it this time because you’re about to go enlist once you graduate and get shipped off to Cali or Paris Island, but, I mean, are you calling it?”

My teeth ground together painfully as my eyes darted across the field, landing on the yellow flowers. “I don’t fucking know what I’m doing.”

Jared snorted. “That’s obvious.”

I snapped my gaze to him, my eyes narrowing. “I didn’t mean about her.”

“Oh.” His throat bobbed, and he pushed off the wall. “Look, I don’t know if you want my advice or not—” He paused, apparently waiting for me to speak. When I didn’t, he continued,“So, I’ll just give it to you, then. We are young. You’re going away”—his arms swayed back and forth with each point he made—“She has no future, and you made a—”

“I can’t do it,” I cut in, dragging a hand down my face. “I’m going to tell Noah I’m callin’ it.”

His eyes widened. “You’ve never called one before.”

“Well, it doesn’t matter to me anymore.”

He searched my face with his hazel eyes before sighing. “Which partexactlydoesn’t matter?” His fingers swept over his short braids. “The money?”

“Any of it.”

“The Marines?”

I shook my head. “Not that, either.”

“Carver. Dude.” Jared shook his head. “You have been training for the Marines since I’ve known you.” My focus narrowed to the several awards on his JROTC uniform. His hands clasped together, pointing at my name badge. “I remember the first time you put that shirt on, and I know it’s Army-related but you were still so proud.”

My fist balled at my side as I looked away. “Your advice, then?” I dipped my head before raising it to meet his gaze again. He was the only one I’d ever talk to about this, besides my parents. But they hadn’t even met her yet. I’m not sure they’d be too proud of the things I dabbled in with the guys, either.

“My advice is: don’t call it. Any of it. Ask her to prom and do what you said you’d do. Get the money from Noah and use it to get her a promise ring or some shit. Go through with enlisting right after you graduate, like you’ve planned to do for years now, and have her wait for you. It’s only a few months and then you’ll get to visit. She will still be here.” His eyes softened as he looked at my fist. “Your life doesn’t have to be upended by some girl you didn’t even know a month ago.”

“I think I love her.” The words tumbled from my mouth.

Jared just sighed again. “Let me ask you this: have you slept with her yet? Have you already won the—”

“No.”

He pinched the bridge of his nose. “Do you want my advice in that department, too?”