Page 9 of Luke (Rogue County Rangers #1)

Marie

I’m on cloud nine when I walk into the hospital. I feel guilty for being so happy when so many around me are in pain and suffering.

My mother is awake but on painkillers. Her doctors from Denver checked her out earlier this morning.

Her condition isn’t ideal, but it’s not nearly as bad as it could be, so they’re still optimistic about her overall recovery.

Her treatment program will have to be either extended or intensified.

They need a day or so to work out the best course. I imagine they have to run tests.

Doc at Rose Haven General tells me she’ll probably be here for two or three more days. Thank goodness she’s drugged up. She’d throw a fit if she knew she couldn’t leave.

“You’re not liking these magazines, are you?” I laugh and put down the glossy gossip rag I picked up from the gas station on the way here. Not the gas station where Luke’s father died. I’ll never go to that gas station. I’m just grateful that a town as small as Rose Haven has more than one station.

In response to my question, my mother shakes her head. She might not be with it enough to understand what she’s indicating, but I’ll take any excuse to stop reading the magazine. I should bring some of her books next time.

If she were more with it, she’d say the magazine is nothing but consumerist propaganda urging me to buy things I don’t need and hate my body. She’s not wrong.

“Okay, how about a story? You’re too high to remember this so I can tell you without emotionally damaging both of us for life, right?

” I’m only half-joking. She nods once before her head droops onto her pillow.

Incoherent as she may be, she looks relaxed and comfortable.

I haven’t seen her relaxed and comfortable in some time.

“I left town after graduation for a really stupid reason,” I say. “So stupid that I didn’t even tell you. I’m sorry I didn’t. It might have made things easier for all of us.”

My mother blinks. Her eyes are glassy and unfocused.

“I’ve been crazy in love with Luke for years,” I laugh. “He was my very first crush. I loved him from the second he told Mary Jane Patterson to screw off when she called me a cow. I thought it would wear off but it never did. I loved him more with each passing year.”

The corners of my mother’s mouth twitch. I think she’s trying to smile.

“Watching him date was terrible. He was gorgeous, athletic, and popular. Obviously, all of the pretty, popular girls wanted to be with him. The worst was Emmaline Kay Hudson. Do you remember her?

My mother shakes her head faintly.

“She’s not worth remembering. She used to put ham in my locker.

” I roll my eyes. “Anyway, she was Luke’s girlfriend in senior year.

After we walked and did the cap toss, I heard her telling her friends that she thought she was pregnant with Luke’s baby.

She was so convinced they were going to get married. I was convinced, too.”

My mother furrows her brow. Maybe she’s more aware than I originally thought. Oh, well. I can’t stop now. I don’t want to. I’ve held this inside for years. It needs to come out. If I can tell my mother without a hitch, then I can tell Luke. I just need a rehearsal, that’s all.

“I couldn’t stand the thought of watching Luke get married and raise a family with Emmaline.

I knew he would do it because it’s the right thing to do.

I also knew that he’d be miserable if he knew he was causing me pain.

I did the only thing I could do, for all of our sakes. I removed myself from the equation.”

My mother nods faintly.

“It was stupid and selfish, but I’ve loved him so much for so long. I didn’t think my heart could take it. I never thought he’d love me that way, ever. Then, something happened last night. I won’t go into details but it was amazing. I’ve never felt so great.”

My mother narrows her eyes just slightly.

“I’m sorry to feel so great when you’re so miserable,” I say as if I can read her mind. “If it makes you feel better, I had an anxiety attack that lasted twelve hours.”

Laughter twinkles in her eyes as her gaze slides behind me. I look over my shoulder expecting a doctor, but instead, Luke stands in the doorway.

“Oh!” I leap to my feet, sending the magazine onto the floor. “Hi. Um, how long have you been there?”

“I came in at ‘she used to put ham in my locker’,” he smiles.

“Ah.” My face heats up before I can control it. “And you heard the rest?”

“All the rest.” His smile grows bigger. “I now feel like the biggest idiot on the planet.”

My stomach flutters in a way that feels more like a knife. “You do?”

“I’ve been in love with you for years and I was too stupid to see that you loved me too.”

At first, I think I’ve hallucinated his words. Then, he closes the distance between us and wraps me in his arms.

“Is there any chance you still love me, even though I’ve been an oblivious moron?” He asks.

“A chance?” I nearly choke on my words. “Of course, there’s a chance. I’ve loved you for over a decade. I’m going to keep loving you through all of the decades to come.”

When he kisses me, I feel like I’m going to dissolve into a cloud of sparkles and flower petals.

“You know,” he murmurs when we break apart, “that means you can’t run off to New Orleans for another six years, right?”

“I’m only going to run off if I can run off with you.”