Page 6

THIRTY YEARS EARLIER

“Come on, Zay,” I hear a voice in the back room.

I step into the mostly dark house, looking for my dad.

“Nah, baby. Not tonight. I gotta go home.”

That’s my dad’s voice. Anger flows through me, but I know what it is. I don’t give a shit. I want him to know that I know. I continue to the back of the house.

“I’ll tell her where you were.”

“Not fucking with you, Essence. I’ve told you what it is.”

As I draw closer to the room, I hear the moans of a woman being pleased. I step inside of the room and see Essence Hamilton riding my dad’s dick. Those big titties are bouncing up and down, and I just shake my head.

If her boyfriend, Julius, were to see her now, he’d beat the shit out of her. I don’t get why women like her stay with men who can’t do anything more than kick their asses. And I don’t get why they provoke men like Julian to do the shit that he does.

“That’s it, Zay. Ohhh, yes,” she moans, bouncing up and down.

My dad’s eyes are closed, and he’s so deep into what she’s doing that he never heard the door open, but she did.

Essence keeps riding my dad while she’s watching me in the mirror on the wall. There’s a mirror that hangs above her bed in place of a headboard. I guess she likes seeing herself fucking or getting fucked.

It’s been this way with the two of them for the last six months. My dad never cheated on my mama until Essence Hamilton moved into the neighborhood.

She knows that he’s married with six kids. Do you think she gives a fuck? Nope. She’s gone out of her way to get his attention and keep it on her. She did everything that she could to lure him into her trap.

I’ve watched her, but I thought my dad was smarter than that. I thought he was smart enough not to get trapped by a woman like Essence, especially when he’s got a good woman like my mama at home.

Don’t get me wrong, I know my daddy loves the hell out of my mama. He’s protective over her, affectionate with her, and there’s nothing he won’t do for her. But somehow, he can’t keep his dick out of Essence Hamilton’s pussy.

It’s been that way since the first time that he slipped up. She knows that she is his weak spot. And so does everyone else in the neighborhood. Everyone knows my daddy is fucking Essence.

I only hope that Mama doesn’t know. I’ve never heard them argue about it.

If my siblings knew, they would be devastated.

My father is their hero, and they’re too young to get caught up in this bullshit.

Savannah’s the second youngest after me, and she’s only eight.

The twins are six, Cheyenne is four, and the baby, Damascus, is two.

Essence was my dad’s high school sweetheart. Only she broke it off with him when she moved away to go to college, and he stayed right here in Chicora Falls to work and take care of his mama, who had diabetes and heart disease.

He met my mama at the factory where they both worked when they were eighteen and fresh out of high school. When he got her pregnant a year later, they moved in together and eventually got married.

Now Essence is watching me in that mirror, taunting me to let me know that she took my daddy from my mama. I want to beat the shit out of her right here, but the way she’s watching me tells me there’s more.

Essence rolls those thick hips of hers and lifts her ass just enough so that I can see her pussy. She slides her tongue out between her teeth and wiggles it at me in the mirror. She cups her breast, slides it in her mouth, and then out again.

She mouths to me, “You want some?”

My jaw clenches, and my nostrils flare. This bitch is fucking my father and fucking with me. If I said yeah, I bet she’d have me over here the minute my dad hits the streets tonight.

“Zay, you like it like this, baby?” she asks my daddy.

“Ohh, yeah,” my daddy responds.

I clench my jaw and my fists. I want to punch him in the throat.

“Like it better than what Nora Grace does for you.”

“Baby, nobody holds a candle to you,” he declares.

It’s at that moment that I want to throw up. The retching starts first, and I hear my father say, “What the fuck?” as I throw up in the hallway.

“Shit!” my dad exclaims, and Essence hops up and screams as though she hadn’t seen me all along.

“Boy, what the hell are you doing here?” he asks as I continue spewing my dinner on her carpet.

“He’s ruining my floors, Isaiah,” she whines.

When I finally finish, I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand and stare at my father.

“Boy, I said, what you doing here?” he demands.

“Mama sent me out to look for you. She ran out of diapers for Damascus, and you said that you were going to the store to get some. That was two hours ago.”

“I know how long I’ve been gone. Fuck! Go home. I’ll be right behind you.”

“Are you leaving?” I Essence asks.

“I told you I can’t stay.”

“I’m tired of coming second to your family, Isaiah. You need to choose tonight. If you can’t, there will be consequences.”

“Are you threatening me?” he asks as I walk into the living room.

“I’m just saying. Make your choice. I won’t play this game with you much longer.”

I slam out of the door and head down the street, running past my house and not stopping until I reach the basketball court.

“Aye, Zaire. You up for a game?” Parker asks.

“Nah, I ain’t feeling that.”

He bounces the ball toward the other guys on the court and walks my way.

“Aye, yo’ wassup, dude? You look like you ’bout to kill a nigga.”

“Might be.”

“Who?”

“My dad.”

“Oh,” he replies grimly. “Essence?”

I glance sideways at him. “So sick of this shit.”

“I know. It wouldn’t be so bad if the whole neighborhood didn’t know. Or if he didn’t do it right across the street, and one door up from your place. I mean, all our old men fuck around. At least the ones who are still in our lives.”

“Yeah, but not where the whole neighborhood knows.”

“Nah, they usually do like my old man and go across town.”

“They don’t go across town. They go a few neighborhoods over. Your daddy is the only one going across town.”

“That’s because he’s fucking that white woman,” Parker declares, shaking his head.

“I just don’t get it. I mean, Essence left his dumb ass. Why would he fuck it all up for her?”

“Sometimes the pussy’s just that good, man.”

I look at him sideways again and nudge him with an elbow. He cracks a smirk and starts laughing.

“What? I’m just saying.”

“You ain’t saying shit, my guy. You’ve only been with Natasha Stanley. That’s the only pussy you know,” I reply, cracking up laughing.

“Yeah, whatever. That’s all I’ve told you about.”

“On the real, let me get up out of here. I need to get Baby D some diapers. He ran out a while ago, and Moms is gonna be bitching about diaper rash in a minute. Don’t know if my daddy’s pulled his dick out of Essence long enough to figure it out.”

Parker starts walking down the block with me.

“How do you know that’s where he’s at?”

“I walked in on them.”

“Fucking?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s fucked up.”

“Don’t I know it? Then she tried to get with me while she was fucking him.”

“Word?”

“Yeah, she’s got this mirror over her bed.”

I told Parker all the details about what happened on the way to the store. He shakes his head. “That’s a grimy bitch.”

“You telling me. Anyway, I don’t want my mom stressing about this bullshit. I wish she’d just leave him.”

“She can’t take care of six kids on her own, man.”

“I know. I’d help her, though.”

“And what? Drop out of school?”

“If that’s what it takes to get him to wake up, then hell yeah. Maybe he’d come to his senses and be a real man.”

“I don’t know. Maybe leave well enough alone. Six kids ain’t no joke. Even if you were working and she was working, you couldn’t do it. That’s why your dad hustles the way he does. That nine to five ain’t taking care of y’all alone. Hell, both of their nine-to-fives can’t do it.”

I sigh because I know Parker’s right. After I pay for the diapers, I head back home. My dad is there talking to one of his boys when I walk in. He still hasn’t thought about the diapers. I guess he figured I’d do it.

I throw the diapers on the kitchen counter, and my mom looks up from cooking. She leans over and smiles at me before she kisses my cheek.

“Thanks, Zaire. You’re a good son.”

I nod and head back to the room that I share with my twin brothers, Aspen and Denver. They’re only six. Savannah and Cheyenne are only four years apart, and they share a room. Damascus is two, but he sleeps in the crib in Mama and Daddy’s room.

I lie back on the bed, put my earphones on, and listen to some music, eventually drifting off to sleep.

I have some things to figure out to get us out of this mess.