Page 21 of Love Me Or Hate Me

Ebony sighed and closed her eyes.

His massages were so different from hers. With him, she spent most of it talking as she worked herself to death to work out his stiff muscles but with her it was vastly different. His touch was always encased in dedicated silence. His hands strong and warm against her skin pushing and kneading her until she was utterly pliant.

The sleeping pill she took earlier flowed through her veins reaching every inch of her body wrapping its chains of sleep around her. The only thing she could concentrate on was the glorious relaxed feeling Gavin was creating as he moved over her buttocks and down the back of her thighs. Each press dragged something out of her, like he was stealing the last threads of tension and leaving her open. Bare.

"Gavin," Ebony groaned against the fluffy comforter. She could barely keep her eyes open. The gentle amber light of his bedside lamp felt like a lighthouse in the far distance.

"Mmm," he hummed, never pausing from his work.

Drunk off fatigue she thought of the one thing she wanted to say and said it without giving it a second thought. "I love you."

She wasn’t sure if she fell asleep or what. One second, she was there and the next there was nothing but darkness. Until warmth draped over her, tucking itself into every line of her body. She tried to speak, to stay tethered, but all that came out was a soft sound, a plea swallowed by sleep.

Then his breath hit her neck, warm and slow, and the words that followed sank beneath her skin like fangs.

"I do notjustlove you, Ebony," he whispered, his voice like dark velvet. "Remember that."

And then she fell deep into nothing.

Chapter eight

Gavin's eyes snapped open. No dream, no sound, just the hollow weight of something very wrong. He blinked, staring into the darkness, the details of the ceiling slowly taking shape.

His senses prickled and his skin tightened. As if his subconscious was reminding him of something very important, something he should very much be aware of. He shifted, the sheets tangling around his waist. He turned and froze, barely breathing as he stared at the sight beside him. The soft sound of her small breaths beside him made everything worse. She was still here, sleeping, trusting, and exposed.

At some point she had turned onto her back, her tank top which was still pushed down, bunched around her waist. Gavin's eyes dilated as he absorbed the image of her. Skin like bronze tempered by fire, her breasts lay soft and heavy against her chest, her head turned away from him. His mouth went dry as he watched her chest rise and fall.

He couldn't look away, couldn't shut his eyes even, he just stared. His eyes slowly traced over her breasts as if memorizing each detail. Like ripe berries, chilled by the night air, tight and small, her nipples sent a palpable pain through him. His mouth began to water, his pulse thundering in his ears. The need to reach out and touch her was nearly unbearable.

Gavin managed to close his eyes. He breathed in and out a few times. After a few minutes he got up, stiffly. His cock felt like a piece of steel between his legs. Carefully, he pulled the blanket up and over her, shielding her from his spiraling thoughts and waning control.

He left the room, stepping over Duke in the hallway. Walking through the living room and the kitchen, he opened the glass door that led outside to the pool.

The humid air hit him in the face. He tilted his head up and stared at the moon. The stars were still and bright against the dark night, like a silent audience watching and waiting for him to scream.

And fuck did he want to.

For the past few years his thoughts about her were growing out of control. Filthy unspeakable thoughts that were getting harder and harder to keep at bay.

He couldn’t even be sure when it all started. Was it a few years ago when she went through her obsession over Harbinger, the fucking piece of shit lead singer of Masked Gods? It had been like a slow poison building up secretly in his system watching her smile and giggle over pictures of the masked singer. The mounting torture as she rambled out endless facts about the rock band. It wasn't until the blind rage had hit him when he had overheard her speaking with Jade of how amazing it would be if Harbinger could be her first.

It had been a cataclysmic shift. Suddenly from that moment on his reality was different. Her soft smile of greeting over breakfast felt like thorns wrapping around his soul. Her laughter was a soothing balm that echoed throughout his head like a ghost. Being near her tore away at his very being, but he couldn’t stay away.

He was stuck. Lost in this fog of inaction. Forbidden to take any steps forward but no desire to pull back—until now.

The image of her lying in his bed flashed through his mind like an afterburn. Gavin closed his eyes. It would haunt him until he died, he was sure of it.

She was right there in his bed, breathing softly, waiting for him. His best friend. The woman he loved. His supposed sister.

Gavin opened his eyes and glared into the dark.

"What the fuck," he whispered into the night.

He clenched his jaw so tight it ached.

Upstairs she was lying there oblivious to the monster she had a hand in creating. Like he wasn’t coming apart at the seams just breathing the same air as her. Like he wasn't committing a thousand unforgivable sins in his head at the sight of her, every one of them darker than the last.

She’s your sister.He tried to remind himself. The thought used to stop him. Now it just pissed him off. Taunted him even.