Page 11

11

GEORGIA

A uggie is crashed out on the blanket and Cade is sprawled out beside him, arms hooked behind his head, lazily watching me. I stretch out my legs and lean back on my elbows, taking in the blue sky dotted with big puffy clouds. Cumulus clouds, if I remember right. Cade is heavy-lidded, looking like he’s ready to join my son in Lala Land.

“Are you gonna nap?” I ask, feeling an unwanted tenderness.

“I’m so sleepy I can hardly keep my eyes open.”

“Go ahead and sleep. I’ll mind the time.”

“You sure?”

“I’m positive.”

He yawns loudly. “Maybe just a ten-minute snooze.”

I lay back as well and close my eyes thinking about how easy today has gone. Next thing I know I’m drifting off to sleep.

I wake with a start and look at my watch. I’ve only been asleep for fifteen minutes and Cade and August are still napping. I roll onto my side and face Cade. I know I shouldn’t be watching him but I can’t help it. Today, I’m crossing all sorts of lines I’d drawn in the sand. With time to study Cade and him none the wiser, it is surely my lucky day and a rare guilty pleasure. I feel like an intruder but I can’t help myself.

I’m fascinated by the resemblance between father and son and watch unapologetically like a thief in the night. No mistaking that he’s the daddy. Same dark mop of hair, matching lush lashes fanning their cheeks, same flawless golden skin and full bottom lip. Cade’s is slightly parted. Same strong jaw, except Aug’s doesn’t have the angles yet since he still has his round baby cheeks. I’m enjoying my freedom to study every inch of Cade Jennings unchecked. Dear Lord, what a specimen.

My eyes wander leisurely downward seemingly of their own accord, past his handsome face down his broad chest, his cargo shorts revealing strong sexy thighs… all the way to his bare feet. He twitches and there is a moment when I try to look away but my fascination is beyond rational thought. Every ounce of me says don’t get caught , but I don’t listen, I ignore it. My heart is pounding in my chest as he lifts heavy lids and catches me. Time stops. My breath hitches. His eyes flare with desire and I’m drowning in their liquid blue depths.

“Gigi,” he says on a long sigh. Rolling onto his side, he bends his elbow and props his head on his palm, never taking his gaze from mine. We’re only inches apart. He reaches for my hand, grasping it loosely while rubbing his thumb over the inside of my wrist. My pulse skips under his thumb, beating like a wild mustang running for its freedom, which does not escape his notice. We gaze into each other’s eyes, neither willing to look away. The comfortable intimacy between us has cast an enchanted spell. All my promises to myself … completely abandoned.

“Remember when we first met?” he murmurs.

“How could I forget?” I say. “I didn’t know a soul at that reception except the bride and groom.”

“Same.” He chuckles. “You were the prettiest girl I’d ever laid eyes on,” he drawls, his eyes lazily scanning my face. “Still are. That hasn’t changed. You were quite fetching in that olive-green jumpsuit with one shoulder out. Damn, I was smitten. I couldn’t believe my luck. The most beautiful girl in the room, all alone and sitting right next to me. I thought I had to be dreaming.”

“I felt so out of place that I kind of latched onto you. I was out of my league at that fancy weddin’. Crystal glassware, champagne towers, a chocolate fountain, for God’s sake. Course that was before I started catering… now I’ve seen it all, but then I felt like a newborn baby deer.”

“In the headlights,” he says with a chuckle.

“Then they played ‘Cha Cha Slide’ and you pulled me onto the dance floor so I could make a complete fool of myself.”

Cade bursts out laughing. “Every time I looked, you were either facing the wrong direction, turning the wrong way, or bumping into somebody. That’s when I knew, man am I ever in trouble. I’ve got to get this girl’s number—I’m not leaving this reception without it.”

I snicker. “If you’d a been a true gentleman you’d have removed me from the scene of the crime.”

“It was way too entertaining. You were the life of the dance floor.”

“I’d never done that dance before in my life. Everyone else looked like they were in on a flash mob. Especially you!”

“What can I say? I’ve been to a lot of weddings.” His eyes sparkle with humor. “You managed to leave the dance floor without breaking an ankle and it was all going so well too… until you got tipsy and spilled your glass of red wine all over that pretty white tablecloth.”

“I wanted to d-i-e!”

“But I gallantly took the blame and scored your phone number. It was a win for me.”

“You were pretty smooth.”

He leans in and barely touches my lips with his. It’s a mere whisper of a kiss. I can feel his breath against my face. I’m practically squirming with want. I fancy this man more than I’ve ever fancied anything in my life. But he is forbidden fruit. I will not bite the apple again. I will not! As I’m falling head first into his baby blues, thinking I’m going under, he opens his mouth and says the exact wrong thing, or maybe the absolute perfect thing.

“I’ve missed you, Georgia.”

I can hear brakes slamming like a cartoon soundtrack. It’s terrifying how quickly I slipped back in time… like we were never apart. He missed me? How about every moment without him felt like an eternity after he left? I sit up and wrap my arms around my bent knees. I see the regret in his eyes and I’ve got plenty of my own.

“I’m sorry, Cade. This,” I gesture between the two of us, “is not going to happen… I mean it cannot happen. Do ya hear me?”

“It just did,” he says quietly.

I glare at him. “Yes, but as of this moment, I am officially friend-zoning you.”

“Why?”

“Because.”

His eyes narrow. “Good answer. And you’re how old?”

“Old enough to know better is how old I am. Besides it’s the best I can come up with right at this moment. My brain is addled.” He laughs. All teeth and crinkly eyes.

“There you go again being adorable,” he says.

I lie back down with a heavy sigh and face him. For the life of me, I can’t make myself put space between the two of us.

“When are you gonna tell your folks?” I ask picking at the lint on the blanket.

“I wanted to wait until after I met August. I’d like to tell them tonight before I leave town if that’s alright with you.”

I blow out a breath. “I reckon.”

“Remember, you call the shots.”

“Everything is about to change in a big way. I’m nervous is all.”

“We’ve got this. I have your back, Georgia. You have nothing to worry about.”

“So you say.” I look at him, suddenly sad and blurt, “Was it that easy to leave me?”

His eyes darken as he stares at me with an intensity that sears me to my core. It’s almost like he can see clear into my soul. “It was the hardest damn thing I’ve ever done and my biggest regret.”

“I guess I’ll have to take your word for it. I’ve tried to put myself in your shoes and never can come up with a scenario where I’d take off without at least sayin’ goodbye. What we had was so special. Now don’t get me wrong, I knew we were on borrowed time but to leave without telling me…” I shake my head, “I didn’t think you were capable of that level of cruelty.”

His voice sounds husky. “I know it seems indefensible now, but at the time, I thought it was the right thing to do. I didn’t think I could handle saying goodbye.”

I brush my fingers across his cheek. “You know I’m not mad at you anymore. It must have knocked you off your ever-lovin’ feet to get the call you’d worked for your whole life. But I learned something about myself. I never want to be second best. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t care one little bit about being in the spotlight or letting others shine… it’s just… I need to know at the end of the day that’s all just the trappings and when the dust settles, I’m the gravy on the biscuit.”

“But you are… you were… all that’s true. I messed up big time. I made a terrible mistake. I was young and dumb. I thought I’d come back for you and if I was lucky, you’d still want me. I didn’t think I could have both at the time.”

“And you made my point. If you couldn’t have both, you chose baseball. I don’t blame you. Out of all the young boys growing up with dreams of being an MLB player, maybe only a thousand at any given moment make it. That’s a drop in the bucket. You were destined for great things, Cade.”

“I’m older now. I know I can have both. I want to be a big part of your lives.”

“And you will be. I’m not going to stop you from a relationship with your son. He needs you too.”

“What about us?”

“There is no us. We’re co-parenting is all.”

He flops onto his back, jaw tight. I can see the muscles working as he grits his teeth.

“The thing is, the way you keep looking at me says something different.”

“Just never you mind the way you think I’m looking at you. Last I checked, I am still a woman. But besides that, I think you’re seeing what you’re wantin’ to see.”

He snorts. “I don’t think so. It was almost embarrassing the way you were undressing me with your eyes.” His twinkling eyes tell me his humor has returned and he’s having way too much fun at my expense.

I huff. “There’s no denying that you’re a sight for sore eyes but let me make it clear, as temptin’ as you are to look at, you’re definitely off the menu for me. Too many sweets are bad for a person. I’m sorry if you thought I was giving mixed signals.”

He rolls his eyes. “Are you being serious right now? There was nothing mixed about it. You couldn’t tear your gaze away when you thought I was still sleeping.”

My cheeks are on fire. “Take it back,” I exclaim. “Admiring you… maybe, I’ll give you that.”

A brilliant smile lights up his face. “Geege, you’re as red as a strawberry.”

I bury my face in my hands. I’m an idiot. My voice is muffled as I say, “I’m sorry if I was gawkin’ and it made you think a certain way but it’s not going to happen.”

“You’re just sorry you got caught,” he teases, tweaking my ponytail.

I kick him, my bare foot brushing against the soft hair on his legs. Another mistake. Oh Lord, but I want this man.

He reaches up and peels my hands from my face. “I said you call the shots and I meant it. Doesn’t mean I have to like it. I hope I can prove to you that I’m worthy of your trust.”

“If I didn’t trust you, I wouldn’t be letting you into Auggie’s life so easily. But with regard to us as a couple… that’s in the past, where it shall remain.”

He smirks at my fancy declaration and says, “We’ll see.”

Auggie opens his eyes and points at the sky smiling. “Cowds.”

“Big puffy clouds,” I say.

“Is he always this happy?”

“Mostly, unless he’s overtired or hungry, then he can get cranky.”

August rolls onto his stomach then crawls to Cade and climbs on top of him. Straddling his chest, he touches Cade’s face following the contours like he’s reading Braille or something. Cade seems frozen as if he’ll ruin the moment if he so much as breathes.

I decide now’s as good a time as any so I take a deep breath in and out then say, “Auggie, this here is your daddy.”

I’m holding my breath as Cade and I exchange a nervous look, waiting to see how Auggie reacts. He repeats, “Da Da.”

“That’s right, he’s your da da.”

He lunges forward buries his face in Cade’s neck and hugs him. My heart is about to melt clean out of my chest. I swear, it is one of the sweetest moments of my life. Cade has tears in his eyes, same as me. We share another sweet parental moment. That is all it is or can ever be but it is more than enough. This could not have gone any smoother.

I stand up to give them a moment and get to cleaning up while Auggie and Cade play quietly on the blanket. For just a teeny tiny second, I allow myself to think if only then slam that fantasy right back in the vault where it belongs.