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I longed for the day I might feel the sun’s warm rays again. If nothing else, Master Lukain was forcing his property to live as vampires. Perhaps knowing we may one day become their thralls. At least for the women.

I had learned bits and pieces in my short time here.

The girls and women enjoyed acting prim and proper, trying on stolen gowns and tailored clothes that made them look pretty.

They were taught classes by older countesses—education, reading, gossip-making—so they might stand out to the hungry vampires they would one day meet and attempt to seduce.

The ladies also did chores such as tailoring, cooking, and keeping the caves somewhat tidy.

Unsurprisingly, the Firehold was quite patriarchal.

While the girls lived relatively risk-free lives—unless they ran into a man like Peltos—the men trained. Constantly. Our lives were a blur of combat classes, sparring sessions, eating, and sleeping.

Still, I did not feel I’d made a mistake joining the boys in the Grimsons.

The idea of whoring myself out to wretched monsters was not something I could stomach.

I’d already known too many monsters in my short life.

I would much rather die in the ring, fighting for my freedom, or at least the illusion of freedom.

I had lived at the whims of cruel men—Father Cullard, Dimmon Plank, even Baylen Sallow when he betrayed me and did nothing to stop my coming here. Nothing had changed in that sense, with Master Lukain taking over where others had left off, yet I felt different .

For once, I felt like I was coming into my own power. It was a slow clawing feeling that swept through me, rejuvenating my desire to live.

After shattering Peltos’ jaw and condemning him to a grisly death aboveground, I went to the eating hall for midday meal, before I would resume my training. The chamber was vast, with rickety long tables and seating benches set up in three rows.

The eating hall was a loud, raucous place.

It was integrated, which meant both boys and girls ate here, typically around the same time.

We settled in by age group: the younglings like me ate first; the older group on the cusp of adulthood ate after.

Three dozen younglings currently filled the space—about twice as many boys than girls.

In all, according to Lukain’s helper Antones, sixty people inhabited the Firehold.

It was an enterprising underground operation.

Unlike the scraps I had survived on with the Diplomats, Master Lukain was not stingy on providing food. We had to eat, after all—men to fight in the ring, women to plump themselves and become desirable.

Great heaps of meat, potatoes, and vegetables filled domed nickel plates on each longtable. Everyone lashed at the food in a communal upheaval, fending off others to get their fair share.

I kept to myself, sitting at the far end of a table nearest the boys. I was essentially exiled from the girls’ side because of the decision I had made to fight rather than breed. Yet the boys didn’t see me as one of them, either, for obvious reasons.

I had put myself in this position, and I’d live with it.

As I ate quietly from my wooden plate, drinking watered-down ale from a wooden mug, two boys plopped down near me. One on my side—too close—the other across from me.

I knew them as Culiar, across from me, and Rirth, next to me. They were friends and I wanted nothing to do with them. Culiar was a wiry youth about my age. Rirth looked a bit older, stocky, with short stubble on his chin and cheeks. I was taller than him.

“Word’s already out that Master let this mute bitch exact discipline on Peltos,” Culiar sneered, speaking across to Rirth like I wasn’t sitting there.

In the weeks I’d been here, I had yet to say a word to any man during eating time.

In fact, I’d barely spoken to anyone. The boys knew, and were jealous of the fact, that Master Lukain had taken a personal interest in my training.

That came with its own spat of rumors, despite me being so young.

I let the rumors talk, because what could I do to stop them?

Rirth scoffed, shaking his head as he bit into a meaty leg of some sort of cooked bird.

Culiar said, “Peltos was my friend.” His tone was threatening.

I set my wooden cup down and lifted my gaze to give him a dead-eyed glare. I said nothing. Then you deserve the same fate if you consider a fiend like that a friend.

“You’ll get yours,” Culiar promised, slapping the table and standing. “Come on,” he bade Rirth. “Let’s get away from this cursed slut before she rubs off on us.”

I had half a mind to slam my wooden cup against Culiar’s face. I resisted.

Rirth glanced over at me. “It’ll have to be in the ring, Cul. You know how Master takes a fancy to this one.”

Culiar laughed as they left the table with their food, their threats clear as day. They headed for a crowded section with other hungry boys, their friends.

I continued eating in silence. The boys and men here believed Master Lukain was coddling me.

At the same time, he gave me the honor of dispensing punishment on Peltos for his rape of the girl Helget.

News of that was already getting out. Lukain is allowing me to build my own reputation, I realized.

He’s giving me the tools to make myself seem greater than I am. The boys either hate me or fear me.

In the case of Culiar and Rirth, I figured it was a bit of both. A small smirk came to my lips, which I hid behind my cup as I drank.

Despite Master Lukain’s casual cruelty and penchant for alarming violence, I was starting to appreciate him. I wanted to know more about Lukain and learn from him.

What does that say about me?

I finished my food and was ready to exit when Antones appeared in the wide archway of the eating chamber with a gaggle of newcomers behind him. The group of five younglings wore the same rags and chafed wrists I had when I’d first arrived.

Looks like Master has stayed busy buying more property.

I sighed and stood—

Then froze as my eyes landed on the girl furthest back from the group, a wide-eyed expression in her eyes.

It was Jinneth of the Diplomats. The girl who had gone missing just when I had started to know her.

The girl whose brother I murdered, which landed me in Dimmon’s tent, on the auction block, and in the Firehold.