Page 29 of Look on the Heart (Darcy and Elizabeth Variations #10)
Her thoughts drifted again as she watched her young cousins dancing around the room.
The Gardiners’ eldest daughter sat with Lydia, painstakingly tying mistletoe to gilt hoops.
White berries stood in stark contrast to the green leaves and bright red ribbons.
The result was quite pretty. A sudden image of Mr. Darcy reaching up and plucking a berry while gazing deeply into her eyes filled Elizabeth’s mind.
She blinked rapidly to dispel the tears that threatened to spill.
“You have been very quiet this evening.” Mrs. Madeline Gardiner, Elizabeth’s favorite aunt, joined her on the settee. “Tell me, what occupies your thoughts?”
“’Tis nothing,” Elizabeth replied, hoping to forestall her aunt’s further inquiry. “I am not in the mood for festivities—that is all.”
“Lizzy, you must be honest with me, my dear, or I shall be unable to help you.”
“You cannot help, Aunt. My state of mind depends upon another, and you hold no power over him.” Elizabeth’s shoulders drooped as she battled the tears that threatened.
Mrs. Gardiner patted her knee. “Ah, so it is a gentleman. Who is it? Do not tell me you pine for Mr. Bingley—he is utterly besotted with your sister.”
Elizabeth chuckled. “I have no interest in Mr. Bingley, I promise. Jane and he are perfectly suited to one another, and I would never interfere with their happiness. Look at them! Have you ever seen two people more ideally matched?”
Jane and Mr. Bingley sat in a corner, whispering together as they worked on some ornament or other. Jane’s blue gown complemented her fair features, and her admirer wore a coat in a similar hue. They looked as though they had been fashioned to suit one another.
“You will not distract me, Lizzy.” Mrs. Gardiner tapped the back of Elizabeth’s hand with her finger. “Who is he?”
Elizabeth smoothed her blush-colored skirt and clasped her hands in her lap. “He is Mr. Darcy of Pemberley in Derbyshire. He came with Mr. Bingley, and I fear I have foolishly fallen in love with him.”
“Mr. Darcy?” Mrs. Gardiner’s surprise made Elizabeth turn to face her.
“How very singular. Lambton lies but five miles from Pemberley. ’Tis a beautiful place—one I would not mind visiting again someday.
” Her brow furrowed. “I do not recall meeting him. The Darcys rarely left the estate. There were rumors that the boy was disfigured—”
“There is nothing wrong with his appearance!” Elizabeth interrupted hotly.
“Peace, Elizabeth. I am merely telling you what was said. I understand he bears a wine stain mark on his face. I recall hearing that the elder Mr. Darcy was an imposing, handsome man—very concerned with appearances. You can imagine what having a less than perfect son meant to him.”
Elizabeth’s heart ached for her love and the trials he had suffered at the hands of those who ought to cherish him. “His misfortunes have been great, indeed,” she whispered aloud. “Oh, Aunt. He did not even say farewell.”
“Did he leave you with expectations of his return?” Mrs. Gardiner asked.
“He as good as told me he wished to propose. I did not discourage him—indeed, I anticipated it! And then—” She choked on a sob. “Then he was gone. He did not come back. I have foolishly given my heart to someone who will not love me in return.”
Hastily, Elizabeth drew a handkerchief from her pocket and dabbed at her eyes, hoping her tears went unnoticed by the others.
“I want to hate him for it, Aunt, but I cannot. Instead, the ache inside me grows and presses upon me, for I am unable to reveal my heartbreak, as almost no one suspects he paid me court. Mary, observant as she is, discovered it—and now you—but I have felt alone in my misery.”
Her aunt slipped an arm around her shoulders. “Come to me in the new year,” she murmured, pressing a kiss to Elizabeth’s temple. “We shall host you for the season, and you will forget all about dishonorable men.”
Sniffing, Elizabeth nodded. “May I wait until Charlotte and Mr. Collins have married?” she asked. “She has requested that I stand up with her.”
“Of course, dearest. I shall speak with your uncle and father to make the arrangements. Perhaps Mary would like to join you.” Mrs. Gardiner gave her niece another brief embrace and rose to speak with her husband about their plans.
The idea of Mary’s company seemed like a fine one.
As the most overlooked sister, Mary was often left out of such invitations.
Since Elizabeth had begun confiding in her, a stronger bond had formed between them.
Perhaps it might grow even more if they shared a season in town.
Resolving to pose the idea to her sister immediately, she glanced about the room.
Mary sat at the pianoforte, playing Christmas songs.
The melody of God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen floated across the space, adding warmth to the festive atmosphere.
Elizabeth approached and reached out to turn the page as her sister finished a stanza.
Her sister looked up and smiled gratefully.
As Mary played on, Elizabeth shared their aunt’s invitation and asked whether she would like to come.
Mary nodded happily. With that settled, Elizabeth went to her aunt and informed her that she and Mary would be delighted to visit London in January.
Pleased, Aunt Gardiner assured them they would enjoy all that town had to offer.
Elizabeth agreed, inwardly resolute that she would put Mr. Darcy from her mind.
It was Christmas, after all. She ought to enjoy every moment.