Page 132 of Liar Witch

I’m not even as shocked as I should be to see myself shifted in the vision. Despite all the effort I’ve put into fighting against my other half, I’m aware that it’s not exactly healthy. I’ve known for a while that eventually I’ll have to shift again. To work on my relationship with my beast. It’s just... so much more difficult than I thought it would be.

It’s almost heartening to see that Icanstill shift fully. Even if the idea fills me with dread.

But the person in the background, watching the event unfold, is my main concern.

Our alpha hasn’t heard from us in almost seventy years. After our capture we tried to return home, only to find the pack’s territory deserted, with no sign as to where they’d moved to.

It’s the way of our people to leave a place behind when one of our pack dies. A form of grieving that allows the family to move on without being reminded of their lost kin at every turn. A part of me has always thought of searching them out, only to dismiss it. If we inadvertently draw the Eagle’s attention to the fact that we’re not the last of our kind, she’ll come for the others.

It’s safer for them to stay out of it.

That’s why we joined theDeadwoodwhen Val offered and never looked back.

Our old alpha being in my vision feels like a sign of how big the conflict to come will be. Part of me knew that whatever’s coming will be bigger than just the seven of us aboard theDeadwood. But I didn’t know that we'd end up dragging everyone into this.

Yet I’ve not seen anything that shows us breaking the fae bargain. Nothing that reassures me we won’t be forced to turn against them all. Be forced to harm our mate.

My scales arestillitching beneath my skin and I growl in frustration, reaching for the first thing that comes to hand and throwing it with all my might towards the wall.

There’s no thump. No satisfying thwack of an object against wood. No yell from Val about abusing his ship.

“Well, that answers one question…” Cas begins, dropping the book back onto the desk.

I groan, flopping back on the bed, only to miscalculate its position in my anger and end up half-on the floor instead. With a muttered curse, I slide onto my ass and slip my head into my hands.

“How bad is it?” he asks.

“Are you alone?” I can still scent Nilsa, but she was just hugging him. Their scents are almost indistinguishable at this point.

“Yes.”

“It’sbad.” I feel like my skin is on fire with the need to shift, and I fear it will only build until even my memories will do nothing to drown out the cries of the beast within.

Cas kneels beside me, his scent and Nilsa’s softening the blows of my other half, but not by much.

“She has to know what we did,” he says. “Leaving her in the dark about this is stupid when it’s still affecting us.”

“No. Even if we wanted to, the bargain will stop us.”

A beat of silence. Cas deciding whether to chase the subject or let it drop.

He chooses the latter. “She still wants to swim.”

I shake my head, incredulous. “I know. What’s that got to do with anything?”

“It means that she’s not letting what happened to her break her, and we’re pretty shit mates if we can’t do the same.”

I press my palms into my eyes, the vision flashing back into my head. “It’s different for you.”

Cas’s growl is low, so low I almost don’t hear it. “Don’t you start comparing again. You always lose.”

“It’s a shit competition, everyone loses.”

But he’s right. No one ever laid a finger on me. No one would dare for fear of risking Fate’s retaliation.

Fate doesn’t give a shit about mental damage, though. Doesn’t care one iota for the family of her Seers. Something our captors used to their advantage.

“Her presence keeps your beast calmer,” I groan. “Why does she rile mine up?”