Page 43 of Lethal (Wellard Asylum #1)

“ I can stop the pain you’re feeling in this moment, Cecelia.

” Halstead’s words run through my mind, causing a shiver to race down my spine.

Nothing that man does is ever with kindness; he’s an opportunist, with malevolent intentions.

I shouldn’t even be tempted to consider his offer.

It’s akin to a snake promising not to bite you, if you just put out your hand in front of its mouth, but you know full well that it will. It’s in its nature after all.

“Please, broken dolly, listen to him, just this once,” Wren’s heartbreaking voice calls out to me, and my chest tightens with pain.

How can I possibly feel this way about men who never truly existed for me?

I know that all of this is sick, that I’m mentally ill, and should just let them go, but I can’t.

In them, I found a kindred spirit, and whether they were real, or not, no longer matters.

“How?” I question, preparing myself for the devastation of when Halstead tells me the only way is with my death, so that I can meet the twins in the afterlife.

Bash’s form shifts again, coming even closer, until I swear I can reach out and touch him.

“I... I can’t live without you, I don’t want to exist if you don’t,” I whisper, my hand shaking as I reach for him, but touch nothing solid.

“I know, little toy, it will all be fine. We’ll protect you, and if he tries to hurt you, I’ll kill him.”

His words should fill me with hope, and also humor.

How is he going to protect me from Halstead, or even kill him, if he’s already dead?

A hysterical chuckle rips from lips that soon turn into deranged sobs.

I don’t want to live in this world if they’re not in it, yet I’m terrified to die.

I force myself to meet Halstead’s observing gaze.

He’s cataloguing all my reactions for his heinous research, research I know won’t end with me, because he’s the biggest monster in the room, maybe even in all of Wellard Asylum.

Bash, Wren, and I are killers, but Halstead.

.. he’s something much worse. “Why would you help me? You said I was weak, and that I was no longer of any use to you? Are you going to kill me?”

A flicker of an emotion crosses Halstead’s features, so quickly that I’m not even sure that I actually witnessed it, and it isn’t my broken mind supplying what I want to see.

“The reasons are my own, Cecelia, but to answer your questions, no, I don’t plan to kill you, unless you leave me no alternative.

You need to understand that you will never leave Wellard, whether you agree to this or not, not even when your heart ceases to beat.

Your flesh will rot, and your bones will turn to dust, and you will still remain here under the bowels of this asylum. ”

Every word out of his lips is another painful slice into my resolve.

The desire to tear my gaze away from his, and look at the twins for reassurance, almost overwhelms me, but I hold strong, needing to show Halstead that I can handle whatever he throws at me.

It’s not like, now that I’m semi-coherent, I don’t remember that I’m serving a life sentence, without the possibility of parole, for Thomas’ and Caterina’s deaths.

That was before you even add the dead orderly to the mix, and that’s if his murder’s been reported.

Somehow, I don’t believe that Halstead wants the authorities wandering around Wellard, and investigating his patients.

No, he’ll make sure that my crime never sees the light of day, just like I’ll never get out of here, to reveal what he’s doing to his vulnerable patients.

I raise my eyebrow, with cockiness that I for sure don’t feel, urging him to continue.

It hasn’t slipped by my attention that Halstead needs to feel in control, and the fucker likes to hear the sound of his own voice.

My eyes slide discreetly around the room for a weapon.

If he’s going to send me to hell’s door, perhaps I’ll take him with me.

Both his henchmen, Jason, and Henry, have moved closer, awaiting their unscrupulous master’s instructions.

I shake out my hands, clenching and unclenching my fingers, and my eyes spy Halstead’s pompous silver pen in the front pocket of his pretentious doctor’s coat.

I quickly divert my glance, so he doesn’t realize what I’m looking at, and lean closer, bringing myself nearer to him.

In his arrogance, he doesn’t even seem to notice.

“In your weakened state, a transorbital lobotomy is what I’m offering you, Cecelia.

It would be a type of ‘soul cure’, freeing you from the weight of all your sins, and trauma. ”

“Don’t trust him, little toy!” Bash rages.

“He’s going to hurt our pretty, broken dolly, Bash! Don’t let him hurt what’s ours!” Wren screams as he moves closer, his body twitching like a live wire.

“ A lobotomy? You’re going to cut into my brain?

What the fuck is the matter with you?“ I dart forward, my hand ripping the shiny pen from his pocket, and lunging toward his face with it, but he moves suddenly out of the way with a gasp, and Henry rushes forward, placing himself in the way. I don’t have time to think, I raise my hand and put all my strength into the movement, as I swing forward and embed the pen into Henry’s eye.

Both his eyes widen dramatically, filled with pain, as if he can’t comprehend what I have just done.

Blood sprays all over my hand, coating it with stickiness, making it impossible to maintain my grip, as the two of us go tumbling to the floor.

His frantic limbs tangle with mine, as various shouts and screams surround us.

I can hear the twins urging me to get up and run, but before I can scramble to my knees, a sharp pain assaults me in the back of my neck.

“Oh, Miss Vaughan, how you surprise me. I do believe now that I will be doing the world a favor, by ensuring you can’t hurt anyone else.”

The room spins around me, and I can hear both the twins screaming at me to get up and fight, but my limbs feel like they suddenly weigh a ton, and I can’t lift my head more than a few inches.

My body drops with a thud on top of Henry, as his body ceases its twitching.

The last thing I see is the pen sticking out of his pupil, as a horrified expression fills his features.

“Bash... Wren... I’m coming... wait for.

.. me.” Darkness blankets over me, soothing the rage that inhabits me.

I no longer care what happens to me, as long as I get to be with them, my Carnevil Twins .

“Please... don’t leave me...”