Page 66 of Lessons in Timing

Lucas:damn that’s deep, you a poet now? ;)

Lucas:#dropthatpoetryanthology

I groaned to myself softly.

Lucas:but seriously though, thank you. I’ve never really talked about this with anyone before. Like my mom kind of gets it, but ...

Lucas:also I’m the third wheel in my friend group and skyler is a teenager, so

I floundered, trying to find a way to sayno please keep talking to me I love itwithout sounding utterly deviant or deranged.

Armand:I like talking to you.

Armand:I hope that doesn’t sound weird.

I was holding my phone so stiffly my fingers had started to ache. I shook out each hand in turn, realized that I was making a horrible, sad little whine in the back of my throat, and that I’d been doing it for quite some time. Why wasn’t Lucas responding? Had I ruined it? What, exactly,wasit that I had potentially ruined?

I was about to start typing out apologies when my phone nearly buzzed out of my hands.

Lucas:It’s not weird. You’re sweet.

Oh god. Why was my body reacting to this simple conversation like it was a thrill park ride? I stopped, took a deep breath, and tried to regain even the slightest, barest shadow of chill.

Armand:Speaking of sweets, any requests?

Armand:I was thinking raspberry sticky buns? I could have them ready by the time you get home from work today?

Too much? It was likely too much. Why didn’t I have the ability to operate in middle gears? Why couldn’t Iperson? And to make things worse, I was agonizing over every line like a bloody teenager.

Lucas:I’m supposed to be dieting damn it, I haven’t earned my treats this week

Lucas:but yes those sound amazing

Lucas:also no work today

Lucas:just a depressing lonely day at home

I blinked down at the screen, the hangover still pulsing dully behind my eyes and my mouth going very, very dry.

Lucas:also didn’t you say you bake when you’re upset? Did I bum you out?

I swallowed thickly, heart thumping in my chest, palms sweating. I knew I should type slowly and carefully but my hands were hardly listening to me.

Armand:I’m not upstart are you hammer?

Armand:upset home

Armand:Are you currently at the flat?

A moment, then:

Lucas:yeah

Lucas:wait, are you?

I stood up. I couldn’t help it—my body was suddenly brimming with nervous energy and I circled the room twice before realizing I hadn’t responded yet.

Armand:Yes.