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CHAPTER FIFTEEN

K ara stood before Thraxar in the dimly lit lounge, her heart hammering in her chest. He looked different in the low light—his body loomed even larger in the shadows and his eyes were pools of darkness.

But despite his imposing size, there was something vulnerable in his posture, in the way his tail flicked restlessly.

“That is the third life you have saved,” she said softly. “Mine, Rory’s, and now Talia.”

His jaw tightened. “I put you both in danger by taking you to the market.”

“No.” She stepped closer, drawn by an impulse she couldn’t explain, close enough that she could feel the heat radiating off his body. “If you hadn’t been there, that child would still be in a cage. And we would still be on that asteroid.”

His massive shoulders shifted in what might have been a shrug, but his eyes remained fixed on some point beyond her. “It was the right thing to do.”

“It was brave,” she insisted. “And kind.”

Something flashed across his face—pain, perhaps, or discomfort. She recognized it immediately; it was the look of someone unused to praise, someone who didn’t believe they deserved it.

“You don’t think so,” she observed.

His gaze finally met hers. “What I think doesn’t matter.”

“It matters to me.” The words slipped out before she could consider them, but she found she meant them. This strange, solitary alien had shown more compassion to her and Rory than anyone had in years. “Something’s troubling you. Has been since we found Talia.”

He was silent for so long that she thought he might not answer. When he finally spoke, his voice was lower, rougher.

“It reminded me of something I’ve spent years trying to forget.”

She waited, giving him space to continue. The ship hummed quietly around them, the only sound besides their breathing.

“I told you my family dies,” he said finally. “What I didn’t tell you is that it was my fault.”

“I don’t believe that for a moment.”

His hands flexed against the armrests. “It’s true. It’s my fault the Red Death took my family.”

Her chest tightened. She’d suspected guilt in his past, but hearing it confirmed made her heart ache for him.

“My parents were traders, like me,” he continued, his gaze distant.

“I enjoyed our travels, but I grew restless. I wanted companions my own age. I wanted to stay in one place. They agreed to let me go to Ciresia for further warrior training and insisted on taking me there. The first wave struck while we were there.”

He paused, and she could see him struggling with the memory.

“My father wanted to leave immediately. I didn’t understand the seriousness of the disease and argued against it. By the time I realized, it was too late.”

She moved closer, perching on the arm of his chair. Close enough to offer comfort, but not so close as to intrude.

“My mother and brother were the first to go…” He swallowed hard.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispered.

“My father contracted it while caring for them. He died three days later.” His eyes were hollow with remembered pain. “I didn’t get sick. Not even a symptom. The medics couldn’t explain it. Some genetic quirk, they said.”

His tail lashed once, a sharp crack in the quiet room.

“When the quarantine was lifted, I took my father’s ship and left. I haven’t returned to Ciresia since.”

“You were grieving,” she said, but he shook his head.

“I was a coward. My people needed every healthy adult to rebuild. I should have stayed to help. Instead, I ran.”

“You were young and you’d lost everything,” she countered. “That’s not cowardice.”

“I betrayed my family and my duty.”

Indignation flared on his behalf. “That’s not fair. No one should be expected to just… function after losing their entire family.”

“But it was my fault.”

“That’s why you live alone,” she said quietly, piecing it together. “Why you keep moving. You’re punishing yourself.”

His head snapped up, eyes narrowing. “I’m not seeking your pity, Kara.”

“Good, because I’m not offering it.” She met his gaze steadily. “I’m offering understanding. I know what it’s like to carry guilt that isn’t yours to bear.”

Something shifted in his expression, a softening around his eyes.

“When Rory’s father left,” she continued, “I blamed myself. I thought if I’d been a better partner, if I’d somehow made Rory more ‘normal,’ he would have stayed.”

He growled low in his throat. “That’s different. Your mate was weak and unworthy.”

“And the expectations of your people are cruel and unreasonable,” she countered. “Grief isn’t a weakness, Thraxar. It’s proof that you loved deeply.”

He stared at her, and she had the distinct impression that no one had ever spoken to him this way before.

“Today, when we found Talia,” she said more gently, “you didn’t hesitate. You saved her without a thought for yourself or the consequences. That’s not the action of a coward.”

“It doesn’t erase what I’ve done. Or failed to do.”

“Maybe not,” she acknowledged. “But it shows who you really are.”

She reached out slowly, giving him time to pull away, and placed her hand on his arm. His skin was warm beneath her hand, the tiny nubs tickling her palm.

“And who I see is someone good. Someone worthy of forgiveness—especially from himself.”

His breathing had deepened, his chest rising and falling in a slow rhythm. His tail wrapped itself around her waist.

“You don’t know me,” he said, but there was no bite in the words.

“I know enough,” she replied.

Their eyes locked, and something electric passed between them. Before she could second-guess herself, she leaned forward and pressed her lips to his.

Unlike their first kiss, this one wasn’t tentative. He responded immediately, one large hand coming up to cradle the back of her head. She slid from the arm of the chair down into his lap and his other hand tightened on her ass, pulling her against the enormous ridge of his erection. His erection…

The realization penetrated the haze of her desire and she pulled back.

“I thought only a Cire female would arouse you.”

“Arousal is possible, but not completion,” he murmured, rocking against her and a wave of pleasure washed over her.

“But…”

He kissed her again and her thoughts scattered in a haze of pleasure.

When she regained her senses, she pulled back just enough to search his face.

She hadn’t planned this, hadn’t meant to complicate their already unusual situation.

But looking into his eyes, feeling his tail wrapped around her, she couldn’t bring herself to regret it.

“Kara,” he murmured, her name sounding exotic and melodic on his tongue. “I’m not… I’m not a good male. I’ve done things I regret.”

She cupped his cheek, marveling at the texture of his skin against her palm. “I’m not asking you to be perfect, Thraxar. I’m asking you to let go of the past.”

His hand slid from her hip to her back, pressing her closer. “I can’t,” he said, his voice rough with emotion.

She leaned in, resting her forehead against his. “Then I’ll help you. We’ll figure it out—together.”

His tail tightened around her waist. She could sense the war raging within him—the desire and hope warring with the guilt and fear.

She wanted to show him that he was worthy of love, that he could find happiness again.

She wanted him to know that she understood his pain and that together, they could heal.

“Kara,” he breathed, his mouth a hair’s breadth from hers, “are you certain?”

“I am,” she whispered.

His lips claimed hers again, and she melted against him. His tail tightened around her waist as his arms enveloped her. He tasted of spice and warmth, his tongue exploring her mouth with a gentleness that belied his warrior’s exterior, the nubbed surface sending shivers of desire down her spine.

His big hands slid under her shirt, stroking her back, and she arched into his touch, craving more. He obliged, one hand sliding around to caress her breast.

“I want to see you,” he rumbled against her mouth.

She nodded and pulled back just enough to tug the shirt over her head. His eyes darkened at the sight of her bare skin, and his thumb brushed over one nipple.

“Beautiful,” he murmured, and heat pooled in her belly. She’d never felt particularly sexy before, but the way Thraxar looked at her, as if she were the most desirable creature in the universe, made her feel beautiful.

She reached for him, tugging at the fastenings of his own clothing until the fabric parted to reveal the broad expanse of his chest. Unable to resist, she traced her fingers over the contours of his muscles. He trembled at her touch, and his hands tightened on her hips.

“Tell me what you like,” he said, his breath warm against her skin.

“I like you,” she said breathlessly

He chuckled, the sound reverberating through her. “That’s not what I meant, little human.”

“Kiss me some more,” she suggested, her hands finding his face and drawing him back to her lips.

He obliged, kissing her deeply. She could feel the hard ridge of his arousal pressed against her core, and she arched against it, seeking more contact.

He groaned, his hips rocking against hers instinctively.

“Yes,” she whispered, her body aching for him. “More.”

“Need to feel you,” he growled, tugging at her clothes. “All of you.”

She raised her arms to help him remove her shirt, then wrapped her legs around his waist, pulling him close. His tail brushed against her inner thighs, and she shivered at the intimacy of the touch.

“I want to learn every part of you,” he said, his lips tracing the shell of her ear. “To discover what brings you pleasure.”

She moaned as his tail slipped between her legs, teasing her entrance.

“You’re doing pretty well so far,” she gasped.

His laughter was a dark rumble. “We’re just getting started, little human.”

He kissed his way down her body, his lips and tongue exploring every inch of her skin. He lingered over her breasts, teasing her nipples with his teeth and tongue until she was writhing beneath him. She stroked her fingers down the ridges covering his skull, urging him on.

“So sensitive,” he murmured, his breath warm against her skin. “I love the way you respond to my touch.”

“More,” she gasped. “I need more.”

He obliged, moving lower. His tail continued its maddening caress between her legs, the small nubs creating delicious friction. When he reached her center, he inhaled deeply, as if savoring her scent.

“So wet for me,” he said, his voice thick with desire. “So ready.”

He flicked his tongue over her clit, and she cried out, her hips bucking up. He chuckled and did it again, this time lingering to circle and tease the sensitive bud. She could feel the pleasure building, her body coiling tighter and tighter with each stroke of his tongue.

“Let go,” he murmured against her as his tail slid into her channel.

She gasped at the sensation, the stretch and the fullness unlike anything she’d felt before. He worked her with his hand and tail, driving her higher and higher until she was mindless with need, her body trembling on the brink of release.

“Please,” she begged, not even sure what she was asking for.

He obliged, his tail thrusting deep as he pressed down hard on her clit. She shattered, her orgasm crashing over her in waves of pleasure. He continued to lap at her, his tail gliding slowly in and out, drawing out her pleasure until she was a trembling, boneless heap beneath him.

“That was…” she tried to speak, but her brain was still scrambled by the intensity of her release. “I’ve never… not like that.”

He kissed his way back up her body, his lips curved in a satisfied smile. “I’m glad I could please you, my sweet human.”

“You did,” she assured him. “Very much. But now it’s your turn.”

He shook his head. “Tonight is about you, Kara. I want to give you pleasure, not take it for myself.”

“Are you afraid that I won’t satisfy you?” she whispered.

“No,” he replied firmly, but then his voice dropped.. “I’m afraid that you will.”

“Thraxar—”

“Please, Kara. Just let me hold you. Let me pretend, for a little while, that I’m worthy of such a treasure.”

She wanted to argue, to tell him that he was more than worthy, that he was brave and strong and good.

That she was the one who should be grateful.

But she could see the vulnerability in his eyes, and so she nodded and curled against his chest. She was almost asleep when he stroked a gentle finger down her cheek.

“You should return to the children,” he said softly. “Before they wake.”

She knew he was right, though part of her wanted nothing more than to stay curled against his warmth. She sat up and pulled her shirt back on.

“Will you be all right?” she asked, noting the tension still evident in his powerful frame.

A rumble of amusement escaped him. “I’ve been alone a long time, Kara. I know how to manage.”

She touched his face, struck by the tenderness she felt for this complex, honorable being. “You don’t have to be alone anymore.”

Something flickered in his eyes—hope, perhaps, or fear. “Go,” he said gently. “We’ll talk more tomorrow.”

She nodded and rose reluctantly. At the doorway, she turned back to look at him. He remained where she’d left him, his massive body somehow both powerful and vulnerable in the dim light.

“Goodnight,” she said softly.

“Goodnight, Kara,” he replied, his deep voice wrapping around her name like a caress.

Rory and Talia were exactly as she’d left them, sleeping peacefully on the narrow bunk. She slipped in beside them, smiling as they both curled into her, and drifted off to sleep.