Page 27

Chapter 27

Freya

Cinnamon and baked apple smells fill the kitchen as I slide the tray of pastries into the oven.

It’s been three days since the ambush, since Stone was taken from me, and this is the first moment I’ve felt anything close to normal.

My hands still shake sometimes when I think about those harrowing moments, but these three alphas have purred around me for three days now, comforting me and letting me recover quietly in their home.

And now, I’m covered in flour with the rhythm of baking beneath my fingers, I know I’ve found my center again.

“Something smells amazing.”

I turn to find Thorne leaning against the doorframe, his powerful frame softened somehow by the casual black tee-shirt and jeans he wears. He’s been different since the hospital—since everything—and I’m still trying to understand the sudden shift. He knows about Stone now. And I’ve waited for him to ask me more. I suppose I’m also wondering why he hasn’t gotten annoyed that I did what I did that night.

“Apple cinnamon rolls,” I say, wiping my hands on the apron I borrowed from his kitchen. “I hope that’s okay. I just needed to...”

“Bake,” he finishes for me, a small smile playing at the corners of his mouth. “Miller told me it’s how you process things.”

“He did.” I bite my lip to stop a smile creeping onto my face. The fact that they’ve been talking about me, learning about me, has a lovely warmth skittering through my chest. “It helps me think.”

Thorne steps into the kitchen, his movements careful, as if trying not to startle me. “Would you make something else for me? For lunch?”

I blink, surprised by the request. “You want me to bake for you?”

“If you’re willing.”

Such a simple thing, but the significance isn’t lost on me. An alpha asking, not demanding. But more than that. Thorne is showing an interest in something that matters to me.

“What would you like?” I’m already mentally cataloging the ingredients I’ve spotted appearing in his now very well-stocked pantry.

“Those cheese puffs you made for the café downtown.” His admission comes with a slight flush across his cheekbones. “I may have ordered them a few times. Even before I knew they were yours.”

The revelation hits me straight in the center of my heart.

He’d tasted my baking before. Had sought it out. All the while, he claimed to want nothing to do with me.

“Gougères,” I say, unable to hide my smile this time. “I can make those. I just need to get some gruyere cheese.”

“I’ll get some," Thorne says. "Then can you teach me how to make them?”

Zane and Miller keep watching from the balcony while I wait for the butter and water to boil. Thorne stands beside me and I’m not sure why he is here.

"Can I help you?" he asks as the mixture starts to boil.

I take the pan from the stove and mix the flour, nutmeg, and seasoning in.

“You can do this but keep stirring until the mixture combines and then put it back on the stove.”

Thorne takes over. Stirring the mixture while I turn down the heat. "I'm sorry, Freya. About what I did.” His voice is quiet as glances at me. I don’t reply and he continues. “I hate myself for ignoring what we could have been sharing all this time." His voice croaks. "Please forgive me."

I could tell him it's okay, but I want him to tell me how much he wants me. I want him to tell me how much he hurts and understand how much he hurt me. "Why should I?"

"Because I was blind to see what was in front of me. I was so in love with the omega who turned my head all those years ago, I just couldn't get the thought of her out of my mind. I wanted no other omega but her. I thought it was you once." He swallows as he continues his confession. "Oh God, I wish I wasn't so stubborn back then."

“You can put the pan on the stove now,” I say. “But keep stirring until it thickens up.”

He follows my direction pretty well. But now he is talking, I don’t want him to stop. "It was hard for me, knowing you were there in that club and looking past me. I know I'm a bit too much sometimes—"

"My God. You're not too much. You're perfect. I saw that, but I didn’t tell you and I'm so fucking sorry—" My throat tightens as he looks at me. "You followed me because you knew we were soulmates. I was the one who was too fucking stupid to let myself trust you."

I suck back a sob and he goes to turn to me. “Don’t stop stirring.”

He smiles and keeps doing as I ask. "I'm going to prove to you how sorry I am every day of your life, if you let me."

Our gazes lock. "I've been hurting every single day since you rejected me."

“Fuck!” His face crumples, and I see the alpha in him break.

My perfume fills the air. And despite how much I need to hear this, my omega instincts kick in and I want to comfort him right now, but I have to stay strong. “Now take it off the heat and let it rest for two minutes.”

He places the pan on the counter and takes my hands in his. "I know I hurt you, and I'll never forgive myself for it."

I pull my hands away from his, wrapping my arms around myself. Nine years of longing and pain can't just vanish with a few pretty words. "Do you have any idea what it was like to know you were my mate, to feel it in every cell of my body, and watch you walk away?"

"Freya—"

"I waited," I whisper, my voice trembling. "I waited for years, thinking maybe someday you'd realize it was me."

"I did once, but I let myself believe it was wrong. I was too busy chasing the memory of someone I couldn't even remember clearly. When you were right there all along.” Thorne drops his head in shame. “I’m sorry. I was waiting for her when I should have been feeling with my soul."

“We need to put the eggs in the pan,” I say, prolonging his agony. “One at a time.”

He sighs, cracking an egg into the pan and stirring. “Shit!”

“It’s fine, it’ll come together,” I tell him. I’m not sure if I’m talking about the gougères or us. “Add the other three eggs and don’t stop stirring.”

He glances my way and smiles. “You’re really bossy.”

I smile back at him. "You know I finally gave up on you last year." The words taste so bitter as I admit it. "I decided I couldn't waste my life waiting for something that would never happen.” I shrug my shoulders. “What changed for you?"

His hand grips the spatula so hard I’m surprised it doesn’t break. "I knew you were stressed. My alpha knew. It was like he was part of me and clawing to get out. And then I caught your scent. That scent. It was like being struck by lightning. Everything inside me just bolted upright–everything made sense–and I had to get to you."

A tear slips down my cheek. "One scent and now you're sure? After nine years of nothing?"

"It wasn't nothing to me," he growls.

“Keep beating the eggs in, you can’t stop.” I could give him the electric mixer, but he can feel the pain.

He grunts as his arm beats the mixture like a mad man. "I've been trying to find you for years—chasing the ghost of you for years—Freya. Dating omegas who reminded me of something I couldn't place. Unable to form relationships because something fundamental was missing. I've been looking for you everywhere without knowing it was you."

"But you never saw me ." I try not to sound like just saying the words gives me pain.

“Oh I did.”

What?

I hold back a whine. I've protected myself for too long to surrender so easily. "No, you didn’t. Nine years, Thorne. For nine years I felt incomplete. Don’t say this to me now."

Thorne turns and reaches for my hand again, and this time I let him take it. He looks up at me with shiny eyes. "Because despite what you think, I liked seeing you in the club. I used to stand back and watch you dancing, laughing and joking and wonder if you were telling me the truth. Because I saw you. And not just the omega.”

His voice breaks and my omega keens inside me, yearning to forgive, to comfort, to claim him as mine.

He continues, “You. Your laugh, your sassiness, your kindness. But it never took away the fact that I wanted my soulmate. So, I stepped away from you."

“We need cheese.”

“Fuck the cheese.” Thorne drops to his knees before me, his powerful frame shaking. “I’m sorry. I am so fucking sorry. It was always you, only I never knew it.”

I feel my resolve weakening, but I need to be sure. "And Stone? Do you hate me for what I did?"

"No. I’m glad you took action, Freya. Stone is our child. He’s a miracle I never dared hope for." Thorne's voice is softer now. "But even if there was no Stone, I would still be here, on my knees, begging you to give me a chance to be yours. Your alpha. Your mate."

The dam inside me breaks, and the tears finally fall. "I hated you for so long."

"You should hate me. I deserve it."

"But you want me for real?" My voice drops to a murmur.

"I want you, Freya. You're the omega who shares my scent. You're mine and I almost lost you." His eyes flick around my face. "Please say you forgive me and let me love you the way I should have from the beginning."

I close my eyes as Thorne rises to his feet. His hands gently frame my face. "I will spend every day making up for the time we lost. I swear on my life. On everything I am."

As I lean into his palm, my omega purrs at his touch, and for the first time in nine years, I feel close to being whole. But I can’t make it too easy for him. “I might find it hard to forget.”

His thumbs brush away my tears. "I won't ask you to forget the pain I caused, only to let me help you heal it."

"I might hate you forever," I whisper.

"Well, that’s fine, but I’m still not going anywhere. Never again." His scent wraps around me. "I'm yours, Freya, forever. I always have been, even when I was too stupid to know it."

“You were?” But despite nine years of heartache, I believe him.