Page 3 of Knot Gonna Lie (Syzygy Omegaverse #1)

“Same here,” I said, feeling the negative tingle inside me morph into an anxious ache.

She knew me completely and had been my stable foundation since arriving here.

All because I’d decided to stop my suppressants, I would need to be claimed soon to avoid experiencing another unbearable heat.

A shiver passed through me, forcing my hands into fists as I tried to block the horrific memory of my first omega heat.

Thankfully, the station had resources to help ease everything.

I would never be able to thank enough for the betas who’d tried to fulfill my needs.

“What happens after I pick my alpha and begin establishing a pack within his clan?” I muttered, hoping the process wasn’t simply cut and release, that we’d still spend time together before I left.

They never explained everything that happened after The Den. I’d only learned fragments from other omegas who’d heard from someone else. The station worked hard to keep us safe and happy, even if it meant leaving us blind to certain aspects.

Happy omega, happy life.

“It all depends on you.” She flicked her guarded gaze at me.

“Some omegas want nothing to do with their gammas once they’re claimed.

They’d rather get to their new lives as quickly as possible, without reminders of their past. Others cling on as much as they can until their need for familiarity fades. ”

“I can’t picture myself wanting to go through another abandonment.”

“I hope that’s the case,” Quinn replied gently.

“You have nothing to worry about. Focus on the task at hand. Once you select your alpha, things will move faster than they are now. It will feel like a whirlwind, but you don’t need to worry.

I’ll check on you often as you become comfortable with your pack and clan.

Once you’re done with your first heat, I’ll slowly reduce my check-ins to only a few times yearly, unless you tell me otherwise. ”

“I don’t think I ever want to reach that point.

” My throat tightened from anxiety coursing through my veins.

How could the station allow such separation to exist?

How could other omegas accept losing their companion—someone they’d had since puberty—simply because they’d moved to the next chapter of their lives?

“I want you in my life. I don’t want to lose you,” I said, my voice filled with iron assurance that might have been mistaken for an alpha’s command.

“I’m not foolish enough to think things will continue exactly as they are now, but you’re an important part of me, Quinn.

If my future alpha lives on one of the colony planets instead of Earth, would you consider relocating there as an enforcer? ”

“It’s not that simple, Elara.” She offered me a sad smile.

“What if Jenna’s omega wants her to follow him wherever he goes?

You’re about to start your life. You’ll want freedom to shape your new existence with your pack and clan, and soon I’ll be forgotten.

That’s a caretaker’s sacrifice—like our parents had to give us up for Syzygy Station.

We care for our assignments, but once they’re claimed, there’s no longer need for us—”

“You keep saying that, but I don’t think you understand.”

“No, Elara,” she corrected, halting in an alcove between two storefront entryways.

Her brown eyes searched mine as we faced each other.

The walkway crowd continued past us as if we didn’t exist, granting us the illusion of privacy.

“I don’t think you understand.” She licked her lips as a sudden wave of her strong scent engulfed me.

The aroma of early morning dew on a field of flowers filled my lungs, instantly calming me with its familiarity.

“You’re resistant because you haven’t found the one, and you’re clinging to the idea of keeping our partnership unchanged.

I know it’s scary, and if you’ve changed your mind and don’t want to continue the process, just let me know.

But you can’t keep fabricating fantasies that you’ll merge your current life with your future one and believing it will all work out.

You can say you want me near, but once you become enthralled by some lucky alpha and wear his mark on your skin, your need for me will fade.

Gammas are safety blankets—your temporary nest if you have to label it—and once you make your perfect nest, fit for mating and bonding with your pack, you won’t want me anymore. ”

“I hate that you keep saying that,” I muttered, shaking my head as I tried to resist the lulling comfort of her scent. “There’ll always be a need for you.”

“We’ll see.” She closed her eyes and sighed. “But first, we need to get the last piece of your outfit for tomorrow, unless you have changed your mind.”

“No, I haven’t changed my mind.” Shaking my head, I gave her a sly smirk. “I know what you’re trying to do. You’re trying to get me to buy some flashy jewelry for tomorrow.”

“You are a gorgeous treasure and deserve to look your best, so you can make all those alphas salivate as soon as their gaze falls on you.” Then, studying me, she grabbed my hand and slowly spun me around, nodding to herself as I halted, facing her.

“I don’t want you showing up without jewelry to complement your gown, even if I have to pay for it myself.

You deserve something to remember your day. ”

“If that’s what I have to do to make you happy, then I will, and I won’t complain about it.

” Her mouth opened as her eyes locked with mine in shock from my lack of resistance.

“I’m serious, Quinn. I may not know what my future holds once I walk through The Den’s doors.

But I know one thing—you’ve been by my side all this time.

I’m scared to think of what will happen once I leave here and what will happen if you’re no longer part of my life. ”

“Same here. You’ll always be in my thoughts, no matter what happens.” She glanced down at our locked hands and gently released hers from mine. Then, jerking her head toward the crowd, her eyes widened as if from fear of what had happened as she studied the passersby.

Out of respect for Jenna and their relationship, I’d prevented myself from becoming too clingy.

She might have been my gamma, but I wasn’t going to jeopardize what she had.

I wasn’t even jealous of Jenna. Other omegas might require their gamma’s undivided attention—a natural response—but as I’d grown older, I knew I would eventually have to leave here.

It would be unfair to prevent Quinn from creating something to look forward to once I was gone.

“Once you pick jewelry for me, what else do we need to do today to prepare for tomorrow?” I asked, breaking the silence as I grabbed Quinn’s attention once more.

She bobbed her head in thought as she turned toward me.

“I’ve ordered your dress and matching shoes to be delivered to your quarters before dinner. Outside of that, I believe you are ready.”