Page 47 of Kilts and Kisses at Highland Hall (Kilts and Kisses #1)

Bex was scrambling for clothes. They didn’t even need to be hers. Instead, she picked up Duncan’s jeans and shirt from last night and slung them on. Then, picking up her heels, she stumbled out of the room and into the front of the house, where Duncan and Katty were standing.

The woman’s eyes widened at the sight of Bex, but she said nothing. Unlike Duncan.

‘Bex, don’t go,’ he pleaded. ‘Please, wait. I just need… I just have to…’

He couldn’t finish his sentence. Of course he couldn’t. What was he going to say to her? His childhood sweetheart was there, and she was having his baby. Whatever had happened between them didn’t matter.

‘I have to get to work,’ she said, pushing past them both, barely hearing Duncan calling after her. Her head was spinning. Katty was pregnant. That was what she’d just heard. Katty was pregnant.

As she clutched the waistband of Duncan’s jeans, her bare feet stinging on the stone paths, she didn’t know if she should laugh or cry.

So much for what she’d said to Kenna about being the one to hurt Duncan.

She couldn’t have got that more wrong if she’d tried.

The way her heart clenched, as if being pierced by Katty’s perfectly manicured nails, was all the evidence she needed.

She had fallen for the groundskeeper, and he was having a baby with another woman.

She fumbled through the castle’s front door, her vision blurred by hot, stinging tears that caused her to trip straight over the bounding red mound in front of her.

‘For crying out loud!’ she snapped, only for the guilt to roll through her. She knelt done on the cold stone floor. ‘I’m sorry, Ruby,’ she said, rubbing the dog’s head. ‘I’m so sorry, girl. I didn’t mean to shout like that. It’s just been a bad morning. A really bad morning.’

‘Everything all right?’ Fergus appeared in the hallway, a blanket wrapped around his shoulders.

‘Guessing the night wasn’t quite the success you’d hoped.

’ His voice was soft and Bex tried to laugh, but the attempt only made the tears spill faster.

She quickly wiped them away, trying to compose herself.

‘I was just going to use that machine o’ yours to make a coffee,’ Fergus continued. ‘Not sure I got it right last time. I was hoping you’d show me how it works? You look like you could do with one yourself. Can add a dash of whisky in it too. I normally do.’

Bex wanted nothing more than to hide under the covers and cry until she fell asleep. But something about the way Fergus looked at her told her this wasn’t the kind of offer you turned down.

‘Okay,’ she said quietly.

While she fixed the coffees, Fergus retrieved a bottle of something dark from the back of one of the cupboards and added a small splash to their mugs. Whatever it was, it warmed her throat and spread comfortingly through her chest.

‘Sorry things didn’t go as you’d hoped,’ he said. ‘If it was Duncan’s fault, I’ll?—’

‘No, no, it wasn’t Duncan’s fault,’ she interrupted. ‘Not at all. Duncan’s a perfect gentleman, which I guess makes it even worse. It’s just… complicated.’ As much as she was desperate to unload, she knew it wasn’t her place to tell Fergus about Duncan and the baby.

‘Grown-up relationships often are,’ he replied with a faint smile. ‘Although, Winny and I weren’t. Not really.’

Bex was curious and seized on the chance for a distraction from her own sorry state.

‘Do you miss her?’

He chuckled, then took a sip of his drink. ‘She was nice. A lovely woman. But she didn’t set my heart on fire the way I suspect young Duncan does for you. And you for him, from what he said.’

‘He spoke about me?’ Bex asked in surprise.

‘Aye, a little.’

She wasn’t sure if that should make her feel pleased or not. Right now, her heart felt like a pile of smouldering ashes, rather than anything remotely on fire.

‘Did you ever have someone like that?’ she asked, eager to shift the conversation from her own heartache. She remembered the photograph of Fergus and Duncan’s grandfather in the study, and a young woman in between them. ‘Someone who set the whole world alight for you?’

Fergus’s gaze drifted off into the past, his face softened by memories.

‘Aye, I did. She lit up my world.’

‘What happened?’ Bex asked, her voice hushed.

‘She got sick.’ He sighed deeply, pain flickering in his eyes.

‘We thought it was just a bug. Something she’d shake off.

She told me she’d see the doctor, get it sorted, and that was the last time I saw her.

Her family came to tell me the doctors found somethin’, and she’d gone away to get treatment.

I thought when she came back, I’d propose. Got the ring and everything, but…’

‘But she didn’t come back,’ Bex whispered.

He nodded. ‘No. After that, I dinnae want to marry anyone else. But, with a place like this, there were expectations. Ishbel was the one who introduced me to Winny. And my sister’s got a good read on folk, most of the time anyway.

And she was right about that match. Winny an’ I had good years together.

She was my best friend, and in lots of ways, that’s all you can hope for. ’

Bex nodded, suddenly feeling as if her own heartache paled in comparison. Her feelings for Duncan, whatever they were, would heal with time. But Fergus had lost something irreplaceable.

As she thought of the old man, she remembered the notebook she had found, with the names of all the different hospitals. Was that to do with this love of his life? She was inclined to think it was.

‘Let me give you a piece of advice from an old man,’ Fergus said, studying her intently. ‘Just keep living. We’ve only got one life, and maybe if I’d lived a little more, opened my heart a bit more, I would’ve made more of it. Just keep living, all right?’

‘I will,’ she said, managing a slight smile before she took a long sip of her coffee. ‘I should get dressed,’ she said, looking down at her attire. ‘And then get to work. Lots to do.’

‘You know what?’ Fergus said, a slanted smile rising on his lips. ‘You should take a day off. I think you’ve earned it. And I promise I won’t tell your boss.’