Page 24 of Kentucky Nights (Dead Man’s Ranch #1)

Kentucky walks in front of the wood-burning fireplace, tossing a few logs in that he keeps to the side. After igniting some kindling and tossing it on top of the chopped wood, he straightens. A baritone thrum sounds from him, adding to the rhythm of the rain against the windows.

I love this weather. It’s my favorite kind. Most find rain to be depressing, but not me. I love the serene quiet it brings. The peace one feels during weather like this is different. It’s like nothing else exists in the world. There’s no fear, no harm, no violence—just rain calming your mind.

Kentucky plucks the necklace from the frame, his flesh burning immediately. The smoke drifts and sways. He doesn’t flinch.

“Does it not hurt?” I don’t want him to be in pain to prove anything to me. “Put it down, Kentucky. Don’t hurt yourself.”

“Don’t worry, Darlin’. It doesn’t hurt. Not anymore. I’m used to it.”

My heart cracks a little knowing that piece of information. “So you’ve done this a lot then?”

“Every morning for many, many years.”

“You still love her, then? You’re in love with her?

” A lump of sadness parks itself in my throat and stomach.

I figured any feelings that were growing for Kentucky would be useless.

Kentucky has lived so many lives and has probably loved triple the amount of women.

“Where is she? Does she know I’m here? I’m not trying to?—”

“—No. No. Nothing like that. I would never do that to anyone. I pride myself on being a good man, an honorable one. You don’t have to worry about that with me.

” He comes over, placing the picture on the coffee table, and hands me the necklace.

Opening the locket, he shows me the pictures hidden in the two ovals.

“There’s something you need to know about me before I get into this story.

I never wanted to be a vampire. I never wanted to live an extended life.

I’m a traditionalist in that sense, I suppose.

You are born, you live, you work, you try to do right, you admit your wrongs, and when you die, hopefully you die with beauty and no regrets.

I was happy with that mindset. All I wanted to do was be a cowboy, have a wife, maybe a few kids, and just…

” he blows out a big breath. “… I don’t know.

Be happy until Death finally came for me. ”

I scoot my legs under me, turning my body towards Kentucky. “I don’t understand. You said Lorcan took your maker to Purgatory? What happened? Did you not like your maker? And I’m assuming your maker means this person turned you into a vampire? ‘Made you’ in a way?”

Kentucky nods with a forced smile. “I met my maker, Audrey?—”

“Audrey? Not Daphne?” I point to the frame, showing the woman I thought we were talking about.

“In order to get to the story of Daphne, I have to tell you about Audrey. I’m bad with dates, intentionally.

I don’t pay attention to time. Time means nothing to me.

Sometime in the 1800s, I met Audrey, and she was a breath of fresh air at that time when she came to town.

I had never met a woman like her. She was so carefree, so wild in comparison to me, so full of life, that I really thought I had found the love of my life. ”

His hand lands on my knee, giving it a good squeeze. “I’m not saying this to hurt you.”

I forgot he can smell what I’m feeling. “Don’t worry about my emotions. I know you have had lives and loves. Plus, I’m not anything to you. You don’t owe me an explanation.”

His eyes flash red as anger stitches across his face. “Don’t ever say that. Don’t ever say you aren’t anything to me when you…you’re everything.”

We stare at one another as I wait for him to spill the secret he hasn’t been telling me. I know it has to do with him needing the four days he asked for. I don’t know why, but I will figure it out.

Curiosity always reveals the truth, which is why I will never stop being curious.

He clears his throat, covering his mouth with his fist. “Well, one night, Audrey and I started talking about the future. She started talking about a thousand years together. It confused me. I thought she was joking around at first.”

I scoot closer to him, taking his hand in mine in hopes it brings him a small amount of peace to get through what he has to tell me.

“She revealed herself to me—her vampire nature—that is.”

“I gathered,” I tease, knocking him in the shoulder with my own.

“I told her I didn’t want a thousand years. I wanted my human life; anything extra wasn’t natural. I valued my humanity, and, in many ways, I still do. At least, I do my best to hold on to the amount I have left. She didn’t like that answer. She refused to be without me.”

“A thousand years? I thought vampires were immortal?”

Kentucky shakes his head, confusing me even more.

“No, we naturally live longer. Audrey said unmated vampires live two hundred years. Vampires who choose to mate with someone they love can live for a thousand years, and then there are vampires who meet their fated mates. They live forever. They are the ones with immortality.”

“Wow.” I’m awestruck, speechless, and confused. “Wait. How old are you?”

“I’m not sure? I think I have another twenty years before I die. Anyway, she thought I was weak for having such human thoughts. She changed me. In order to be changed, I had to die with her blood in my system, and at the same time, I staked her.”

“That must have been terrible for you. To be something you never wanted to be.”

“It was. I readjusted my way of thinking. I decided to be alone until I died. One day, years later, I went to the feed store, and I met Daphne. I had mystified everyone in town into not thinking about my age so I could stay here. This is my home, and I wasn’t going to get pushed out because of who I was now.

I had never met her before. She was new to town and Hank’s—the owner of the feed store—step-granddaughter.

It was why I had never seen her before. He was going to train her to take over since he was aging.

I fell in love with her in the best way I could.

Even though she wasn’t my fated mate, I loved her anyway. ”

“I like that you weren’t alone. You’re too good a man to be living a life by yourself.

What was she like? Why didn’t she get turned?

And if you can have a mate for a thousand years, why not do that so you could be together?

” Even speaking those words sends a searing hot blade through my heart.

The idea of him with another woman is almost painful enough to send me to my knees.

“She didn’t want to live that long. I respected her decision.

It wasn’t easy, but we made it work. I never bit her.

She always gave me a few drops of her blood in my coffee, or I’d have blood bags, but I never fed from her.

I wanted to save my bite for my mate, if I ever met her, and Daphne was okay with that.

Plus, biting her would have mated us, and I wouldn’t lose control to go against her wishes like that.

She lived a long, happy life. She’s buried by the tree right there, where all those roses are.

Those were her favorite flowers. I was there with her to the very end.

I held her wrinkled, aged hand, listened to her heartbeat slow, and she died with a smile on her face.

It was one of the hardest moments I’ve ever experienced.

She always said I was here for a reason because I was so kind, but I couldn’t disagree more.

” He stops speaking, eyeing me as if he wants to say more.

“I’m so sorry, Kentucky. She sounded like a very good woman.

I’m so sorry. I’m happy you found a person to spend a part of your life with.

That is beautiful. You created memories in a time when you thought you wouldn’t.

” I climb into his lap, wrapping my arms around his neck, and bury my face into his shoulder.

“I can’t imagine how hard that must have been.

” I lean away, needing to see his handsome face.

“And now what? You’re waiting to die?” There isn’t a part of me that can understand all the heartbreak and betrayal he has experienced.

So many years of being alone, being denied the life he dreamed about, losing what he has loved over and over again. The agony of that must be soul-numbing.

“Daphne kept me alive in hopes I’d find my fated mate; without that, death seems like the next peaceful step.

Right out in the pasture, under the sunset, so I can see the colors in the sky one last time.

I’d see all the stars, get lost in their beauty, and then, in one last exhale, I’ll fade to dust, allowing the wind to take me. ”

“There’s nothing that could change your mind?” I sniffle, hiding my face in his shoulder so he doesn’t see me cry.

He grips the back of my neck, forcing me to look at his handsome face again.

“Hey, hey, hey, none of that. Don’t be sad for me.

Don’t cry for me. I don’t deserve your tears, Darlin’.

I’m not worth the energy spent. I’ve lived for so long, I’ve made my peace with death.

” His thumb brushes over the apple of my cheek, erasing the tears meant for him.

“There has to be something to get you to stay. What if you met a human who loved you and was okay with mating? And you could live for a thousand years?”

The outer rims of his irises flare in response to my question, and I find myself completely hypnotized by the creature that lurks within his skin.

“I couldn’t do that to anyone. I couldn’t take someone’s will like that and force a thousand years on that person. It isn’t right.”

“What if they wanted to?” Another warm tear breaks from my lash line, falling onto his arm.

“The only woman I could live like that for is my fated mate.”

“And if you found her?” I dare to ask, my heart thumping so loudly and hard, there is no way he can’t hear the rush of blood pouring through my veins.

“She’d have to be okay with forever, but forever is a very long time. Everyone she loves and knows will die. Everything in the world will change a million times. People will change. The climate. Paranormals will most likely outlive the human species. It might be a lonely existence.”

“Maybe it will be scary, but it might also be absolutely beautiful.” My hands frame his square jaw, his skin softer than I thought it would be. He feels so human.

Becoming brave, or stupid, considering he could drain me of blood before I could scream, my fingers drift through his pitch black beard, which is also a lot softer than I thought it would be.

“What are you smiling about?” he teases, running his palm up my nape, his fingers massaging my scalp.

“You. You surprise me. You feel so human. Your skin, your hair, I know that’s such a silly thing to say. I expected your hair to be harsh or your skin to be rock solid.”

“That’s not silly. My skin does have a much stronger barrier than yours, but the beard? That’s just the beard kit I have in my restroom. Can’t even blame it on the vampire genes.”

That crooked smile returns, causing my stomach to flip.

“You’d be open to loving someone again?”

He circles his arms around me, a slight purr coming from his chest. “Depends on who that someone is.”

I get lost in how he looks at me. I have never had a man drink me in like this. He takes his time as his eyes wander down, then up, fixating on my lips.

Every breath becomes heavier, the slight scent of syrup sweetening the small amount of space between us.

The rough hold he has on me proves he is fighting control too.

Kentucky’s fingers dig into my back while mine claw into his firm shoulders.

I need him to keep me grounded, to keep me in place, or I might wake up and be disappointed that this was all a dream.

“Kiss me to put me out of my misery.” The words slip out of my mouth before I can stop myself. “Or let me go because I don’t know if I can survive four days of this.” My hand drops to his bare chest, appreciating how his shoulders rise with a deep breath from my touch.

A second passes without him taking me up on my offer. He is deep in thought, considering how furrowed his brows are.

Taking that as a hint, I slide off his lap and regret taking that huge leap. I thought we had a spark all this time. Did I misread his kindness for me?

It’s time for me to go home, not create a new one with a man I don’t know.

Maybe his heart is still taken by a ghost.