Page 34 of Just This Once (Stone Family #2)

Taryn

I wake up to my phone buzzing on the nightstand.

Dante’s arm is draped over me, his breath steady and rhythmic.

After everything that happened yesterday with the kids and Craig and then the earth-shattering sex, it was a long time before I was able to find my balance again, so Dante and I stayed up until the middle of the night watching I Love Lucy in bed.

Then we spent the morning talking and laughing and playing with Frankie and Tortellini. We made pancakes and did laundry together before falling back into my bed with clean sheets to take a nap. A glance at my phone screen tells me we’ve only been sleeping for about thirty minutes.

I sit up to answer Maddie’s call. “Hey, honey. Everything okay?”

Her voice is low and rushed on the other end. “No. Can you come pick us up?”

I tense. “What’s wrong?”

“Dad and Jake are fighting. Jake said… He said Da d was shitty, and now Dad’s mad. He said if Jake doesn’t need him for anything, he can leave, and good luck paying for college.”

“Sit tight. I’m on my way.” I don’t think. I move on instinct. To go get my kids.

Dante stirs, propping himself up on his elbow. “What’s going on?”

I hastily shove my feet into shoes. “Craig and Jake had an argument. I need pick up the kids.”

The sheet pools around his waist when he sits up, his chest bare because he can’t ever sleep with clothes on. “Want me to come with you?”

“No.”

He stands in only his underwear, reaching for his pants on the floor. “I think maybe I should, just in case.”

“No, it’ll only make everything worse. I can handle myself.”

He watches as I run my fingers through my hair and throw on a hoodie over my shirt, and I know he doesn’t like that I’m going alone, but having Dante there with Craig might escalate the situation. I can’t risk it.

Eventually, he nods in understanding and kisses my cheek. “Call me if you need anything.”

The fifteen-minute drive to Craig’s house is a blur of anger and anxiety, and when I pull up to the curb, I immediately spy Jake sitting on the front steps. It’s freezing out, and he’s only in a hoodie and sweats.

I step out of my car, slamming the door behind me. Jake peers up at me, his eyes red-rimmed. “Mom?—”

“Where’s your father?”

“Inside.”

“Go in the car and get warm. I left the keys in there.”

I stride past him, pushing open the front door and storming to the back to find my motherfucker of an ex-husband. He’s in the kitchen and spins to face me with a beer in his hand, expression stony.

“What the hell happened?” I demand, but he doesn’t answer right away.

Merely takes a leisurely sip of his beer then moves to lean against the counter.

The kitchen—my old kitchen—is huge. The whole house—my old house—is huge because he can afford it.

When we divorced, he bought me out, though he fought me tooth and nail on everything.

Even wanted to split the garden tools, the rakes and shovels.

Though none of his money can buy him any goddamn sense, compassion, or parenting skills. He sets his beer down and crosses his arms, all smug. “Well, your son thinks I’m a shitty dad, so maybe you should ask him.”

“I’m asking you, Craig. What did you say to him?”

He clucks his tongue. “I told him the truth. If he thinks I’m so shitty, then he doesn’t need me for anything. Good luck paying for college without my money.”

My vision blurs with rage. “You selfish bastard. You think money makes you a father? You think throwing cash at them makes up for all the times you’ve let them down?”

Craig slams his hand on the counter. “I provide for them! That’s more than you can say.”

“You provide the bare minimum,” I hiss, my finger up and pointed in his direction.

“You’re always late for Maddie’s events, if you even decide to show up.

You never help with homework, you don’t do their laundry, you don’t cook their meals.

I mean, my god! You get them for two weekends a month!

How much do you think you’re providing for them in that time? ”

“I am their father!” he shouts, as if that makes it so, and I take a step closer to him, all of the pent-up rage I’ve felt over the last fifteen years boiling over.

“Being a father is more than monthly checks. If you haven’t figured that out by now, then you have your answer as to why my son would call you a shitty dad, because that is what you are.”

His smile is pure self-importance. “You wouldn’t even begin to know what a good dad is, seeing as yours walked out on you.”

I refuse to let him see how much that hurts and instead throw it back on him.

“Unfortunately for you, yours stuck around to spoil you and give you everything so you never had to work a day in your life. Just ran to Daddy with every problem or whenever you needed money. It’s so easy for you to play the victim when you’re really the villain. ”

He steps closer to me, and I’m not afraid of him hitting me.

In fact, I keep my hands behind my back, because I fear what I might do without thinking, and he would love to call the cops on me.

“You’ve been poisoning the kids against me from day one,” he grits out, proving my point. “This is all your fault.”

“Sure. Go ahead and believe that, but it’s not me they are trying to get away from right now. It’s you. And it’s not you they call when they need help. It’s me.”

“You’re such a?—”

“Mom?”

Craig and I both swing around at the sound of Maddie’s voice. Madeline is not a little girl, but the way her shoulders are drooped and her eyes are full of tears, she looks so young now.

“It’s okay,” I tell her, stepping toward her. “Everything is fine. We’re going to go home now.”

Craig makes a sound as if to speak, but when I shoot a glare at him, he closes his mouth. Typical. When the time comes for him to prove he can be a good father, he can’t. He doesn’t know what to say or how to act.

I provide an example of what he should do and caress Maddie’s head. “I’m sorry, sweetie. Whatever you heard, I’m sorry. You shouldn’t hear us yelling at each other, but everything is all right. Go get your stuff. Your brother is already in the car. I’ll be out in a minute.”

She nods and turns away. I wait until I hear the front door open and close to face Craig once more. “I’m going to be contacting my lawyer. Don’t expect to see the kids again unless you’re ready to act like the man they need in their lives.”

I’m impressed that my voice is so steady. Resolute. When I’m shredded inside. For my children. For myself. For what could have been. For what I haven’t been able to protect them from.

But I’m done. I can’t continue to put them or myself through this anymore.

Craig doesn’t respond, and I stalk out of the house, leaving him standing alone in the house we used to share. Jake and Maddie are both in the car, buckled up. He’s in the passenger seat, features unreadable, while she’s in the back, crying quietly.

I don’t know what else to say to them besides, “I love you both so much, and I’m really sorry.”

They don’t reply, not that I expect them to, and I swallow down the lump of anxiety in my throat to focus on driving us home, where we all crash on the couch with Frankie.

We watch reruns of New Girl , and it isn’t until about forty minutes later that Jake finally says, “He brought up Dante, asking about who he is and what I think about him. He was acting like… Like suddenly he had a say in things and had to protect us against this stranger, so I told him Dante has been around more in the last month than he’s been around in the last year.

That pissed him off, and I said it wasn’t my fault he’s a shitty dad.

That’s when he said if he’s so shitty, I don’t need him for anything.

That I could leave and figure out another way of paying for college because he wouldn’t be. ”

I put my arm around him, kissing his head, holding him to me like I used to do when he was younger.

“You have every right to stand up for yourself and shouldn’t feel bad about speaking your mind.

” I rub his back. “You did good.” Then I kiss him again before turning to Maddie to drop a kiss on her head too. “Time for dinner?”

Maddie smiles timidly. Jake lifts a tired shoulder, but he doesn’t say no, so I get up, making sure to tuck the blanket back around them and the dog then shuffle to the kitchen.

I’d planned on going to the grocery store this afternoon, but since I never got to do that, I reach for a box of spaghetti and jarred sauce.

We eat huddled together on the couch, balancing our plates in our hands. Whatever was broken today won’t be healed anytime soon, but this is a start, our time to relax and be near one another.

As I hold out my hand to gather their dishes to take to the kitchen, Maddie looks up at me, her eyes serious. “Mom, I don’t want to go back to Dad’s again.”

I pause. “Okay, honey. You won’t have to.”

Her eyes expand to three times their normal size, and my heart breaks all over again. “Promise?”

My nose stings with unshed tears I refuse to let my children witness. “I promise. I don’t know how we’ll make it work yet, but I’ll talk to my lawyer. We’ll go for full custody, if that’s what you want.”

Maddie doesn’t answer, wiping her eyes with her hands, so I look to Jake, who shakes his head. “I don’t want to see him again if I don’t have to.”

“Okay, then we’ll figure it out.”

He sniffs, his mouth working side to side. “What if… What if he fights it ?”

“I honestly don’t know. He probably will, but we’ll figure it out. We always do.”

Forgetting about cleaning up for now, I snuggle with my kids.

Maddie rests her head on my shoulder, and I pat Jake’s knee.

Thankfully, everything begins to feel a little more normal when they argue over what to watch, and I take the opportunity to text Ian, Griffin, Marianne, and Clara on one thread because it’s better to rip off the Band-Aid at once.

I give them a shorthand version of the events from today and let them know that I’ll be asking for full custody, and that if they ever see Craig to not engage.

To which they respond:

Ian

Oh, I’ll fucking engage.

Griffin

With my motherfucking fist.

Clara

From the man who took an oath to the Constitution!

Clara

But, yes, I would pay to see it.

Marianne

Tar, We’re all behind you 10000000%

I suppose it’s the most I can ask for. Unwavering support in the face of an uphill battle.

Eventually, the kids wander off, Jake to play video games, and Maddie to watch yet another Cynthia Erivo interview.

I curl up with Frankie until Dante texts that he wants to come over and make sure I’m okay.

I don’t really have the energy one way or the other, although I know if I don’t let him see proof in person that I am indeed okay, he’ll keep hounding me.

Because that boy is nothing if not dogged.

I probably should have texted him earlier; I know how he worries.

But I am completely wrung out, emotionally drained, and I don’t want to have to deal with him and all my complicated feelings about him while also trying to keep my family together.

So hopefully he’ll settle for a few minutes and then let me go to sleep.

If only I weren’t such a bitch.

Maybe then I wouldn’t know what it feels like to break his heart.